


Last First Kiss

by Laces



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Boss/Employee Relationship, Bottom Sam Winchester, Break Up, Comatose Sam Winchester, Eventual Happy Ending, Gun Violence, Intern Sam Winchester, Law Student Sam Winchester, Lawyer Lucifer (Supernatural), M/M, Major Character Injury, Married Ellen Harvelle/Bobby Singer, Mechanic Dean Winchester, Memory Loss, Minor Character Death, PTSD, Post-Break Up, Samifer - Freeform, Surgeon Castiel, Top Lucifer (Supernatural), background cas/dean - Freeform, brief mentions of underage prostitutions, lawyer!au, lots of fluff then lots of angst, no actual sexual harassment, only a couple sentences I swear, sexual harassment allegations, tags are being added as I go to avoid spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-24
Updated: 2018-12-03
Packaged: 2019-05-16 09:17:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 23
Words: 80,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14808521
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Laces/pseuds/Laces
Summary: Falling in love with the new intern is perfectly acceptable when you're the boss...But finding a balance between work and play is harder than expected.





	1. You Owned the Room

**Author's Note:**

> This is my very first Samifer fic, and first chaptered fanfiction altogether, so please hang with me - I'd love feedback.

Sam pushed open the front door, trying to keep quiet since he knew his brother didn’t need to get up for at least another hour. 

“Sammy? Get your ass in here!” Dean yelled from the kitchen and although surprised, he couldn’t help but smile. Drenched in sweat from his run, he made his way to the kitchen, only noticing the smell of bacon as he got closer. 

“I got up early to make my baby brother a nice damn breakfast before his first day and you went off on a run!” The man complained, glancing at Sam’s top knot and making a face. 

“It’s good for you, Dean. Endorphins and whatnot. Plus, I needed to stretch out. I was stiff as a board when I woke up this morning,” Sam defended himself between gulps of water. Dean got that guilty look on his face like he did whenever the topic of their sleeping arrangements came up. 

“Man, I offered to let you take the bed last night. For your first day and everything.” He was rubbing the back of his neck with a sheepish look. Sam glanced in the direction of the sofa-bed that he hadn’t bothered to fold up before he headed out that morning. 

“I was fine, Dean.” 

“Yeah, but-” 

“Stop it. I’m going to go take a shower and then we can devour this breakfast you made, yeah?” 

Dean didn’t answer, but that was only because Sam was already too far away for him to even bother to protest. 

An hour later, Sam was dressed in his newest suit with Dean fussing over his appearance -- specifically, his long hair. This suit had been bought straight from a retail store instead of second-hand and even though it was still a cheap little thing, he was still proud of it. 

“Dean!” He finally chided, lifting a hand to stop his brother from fiddling with him. “Stop with the Mother Hen thing, yeah? I’m going to be okay. I’ve been waiting for this my entire life,” he assured his older brother with a smile. 

“Just.. make a good impression, okay? Be polite and shit.” 

That phrase brought back vivid memories of the morning over their last adoption interview and Sam couldn’t help but grin. 

* * *

_Dean was perfectly content to continue traveling from group home to group home until he turned eighteen. If he only had to worry about himself, he wouldn’t have made a damn effort for any of these adoption interviews. He didn’t want to be with any of these families just as much as they didn’t want him. But it wasn’t just him. Sammy was only eleven and the kid needed something stable. So when the house mother told him that she had high hopes for the next family, he took her seriously. Dean put on clean clothes, got the house mother to patch up the hole in the one pair of Sammy’s jeans that actually fit, scrubbed at the younger’s tennis shoes until they looked like they had been bought in at least the last year, and made sure Sammy brushed his hair. That morning specifically, Dean had grabbed onto Sam’s shoulders, pulling him away from the door that hid them from their potential new family._  


_“You make a good impression, okay? Be polite and shit,” he warned, patting his brother’s hair down._  


_Thankfully, finding Bobby, Ellen, and their daughter Jo on the other side of the door was easily the best thing that had ever happened to either of the boys._

* * *

____

Sam nodded at his brother before grabbing his beat-up briefcase from beside the sofa-bed. Dean coughed awkwardly and held up a finger, gesturing for him to wait a moment as he disappeared into his bedroom. When he returned, he was carrying a brand new briefcase that still smelled of new leather. Sam’s face lit up for just a moment before the guilt rushed over him.  


“Dean, you really didn’t have to do that. I’m scared to ask how much it cost,” he said, not taking it out of Dean’s hands. His brother scowled and shoved the briefcase at him.  


“You’re not gonna ask because it’s a damn gift. Just take it, man.”  


“But Dean-”  


“You can’t go walking in to that fancy-ass law firm with that old thing, okay? I know even this one ain’t nothing like the kind of quality they’re gonna have but you just pretend that it is and one day it will be. You make them take you seriously, Sammy.” Dean tried to sound casual but Sam could detect the wave of emotion that traveled behind his elder brother’s words.  


“Thanks, Dean. Look, I really appreciate it. I know-”  


“Don’t get all sappy on me. Just go, you don’t want to be late for your first day.”  


“Jerk.”  


“Bitch.”  


Both boys left for work that morning with wide smiles. 

\--

Lucifer tried not to hold office-wide meetings very often. Respecting everyone’s time was something he actively put a lot of effort into. If it could be said with an email, it would be. If anything, his own time was much too valuable to spend doing office-wide announcements. That was one of the reasons he hired only the most competent people for his firm - he didn’t have to walk them through their own jobs.  


Despite his distaste with these types of affairs, welcoming the new interns each year was always an office-wide event. It was the quickest way to introduce the interns to everyone in the firm and lay out his expectations for how they were to be treated by their full-time staff. Interns at Alighieri Law were to actively participate in cases, not be made to only fetch coffee. That was one of the reasons that there was such tough competition for his internship positions. His interns left ready to conquer.  


Alighieri Law had received nine-hundred seventy-two internship applications this year to fill their five open spots. Lucifer had trusted his staff to narrow down the pile to a solid seventy-five third-year students before he took over and handpicked his five. It was an arduous task but their reputation for only having the best of the best had to be represented all around - from their interns to him himself.  


Once he moved up front to give his little speech, the room quieted down before he could even bother to ask for their attention. As he spoke, he continued to look in the direction of the new interns, as this entire rendezvous was for them. At one point, when he made eye contact with a long-haired beauty, he almost forgot what he was saying mid-sentence. He knew from the file that it was Sam Winchester - an outstanding applicant who had impressed Lucifer so much that he filled the first out of the five spots. The younger simply smirked at him until he looked away, finishing up and dismissing everyone.  


Most of the employees lingered, munching on the breakfast items that were provided for the meeting, if only as a way to prolong starting their Monday. The interns took the opportunity to begin to schmooze with the partners of the firm. Making connections was important, even after the position is secure. A recommendation from Alighieri Law could get an intern into any firm they wanted or, if they were good enough, an offer here. Lucifer found pleasure in watching the fresh faces nervously bounce around, introducing themselves with a ferocious enthusiasm that only a baby lawyer could have.  


Except for Sam.  


Sam had wandered into a group of chatting workers and made himself at home. He had introduced himself, of course, but let the others lead the conversation and jumped in when it was necessary. There was no nervous energy around him.  


Lucifer’s attention was torn away from Sam when one of the other interns walked up, introducing herself.  


“Mr. Alighieri! I’m Jessica Moore. It’s a pleasure to finally meet you in person!” She was enthusiastic, trying too hard not to look nervous. He noted that she had a nice, firm handshake but she held onto his hand for way too long. She told him the usual - she was excited to work with him, thank you for the opportunity, blah blah blah. When she made her escape and the others realized that he hadn’t eaten her alive, they made their way over to him, one-by-one. He stayed put after number four, waiting for number five to wander over. And waited. And waited.  


But Sam wasn’t coming. Out of curiosity, Lucifer found himself walking in the man’s direction. He was welcomed into the conversation with the small group and only then did Sam finally introduce himself.  


“Sam Winchester, nice to meet you,” he said casually, handshake firm. After that one sentence, he turned his attention back to the group as a whole, as if he belonged there all along. And Lucifer could see it was because he did. 

\--

The first thing Sam heard when he walked in the door after his first day was, “I don’t know, Momma, he hasn’t gotten home yet!” Sam chuckled quietly to himself as he listened to Dean fight off Ellen, who had most definitely heard the door open and knew that her younger son was the only one who could’ve just come in. He appreciated Dean’s efforts greatly, as he was exhausted after his first day, but he knew it wasn’t going to last very long. Setting down his briefcase, he squeezed past Dean in order to pour himself a glass of water, giving him a gesture that asked him to hold on a minute. When he was done, he held his hand out for the phone and Dean jumped at the chance to get their mother off of his back. Not that he didn’t love her dearly, but he just didn’t have the answers that she wanted about Sam’s first day.  


Sam had assumed that Dean would’ve ran off after successfully getting rid of the phone, but he stuck around in order to listen as well. The two sat down at their kitchen table, put Ellen on speaker on the table, and they listened as Sam launched into his spill about the new firm.  


“Like I told you, there were only five new spots for interns. And let me tell you, these people are smart, Momma.”  


“You’re smart too,” Dean jumped in before their mother could, defensive.  


“I didn’t say I wasn’t, calm down. It’s kinda neat, you know? Knowing that Mr. Alighieri thinks that I’m on the same level as they are. Did I tell you that he handpicks the interns too?”  


Sam carried on, talking to his family (as Bobby had joined the conversation eventually) about everything he could think of that had happened that day. He even bragged on Dean -- telling them about how he had gotten up to make him a big breakfast and told them all about his gift as well, earning himself a kick in the shin from his big brother as Ellen told him how sweet that was of him.  


“Okay, okay, I gotta fix us some dinner. It’s been nice catching up and all, but if I don’t get something in my belly soon, I may have to result to eating the brand new baby lawyer,” Dean joked after a while, getting up from the table.  


“You make sure to get some vegetables on that plate, Dean!” Ellen shouted from the phone.  


“‘Vegetables, Dean,’” Dean mocked in a high-pitched voice, causing Sam to snicker.  


“Boy, don’t you disrespect your momma like that,” Bobby’s gruff voice came through the phone for the first time since he announced his presence. Sam laughed as Dean’s face turned pink.  


“I’m sorry, Ma!”

* * *

_The first time Sam called Ellen “mom,” it was four months after the adoption had become final. He was talking to some friends at school and had mentioned that his mom had planned on taking him out for ice cream after dinner because of his perfect report card. Dean had been coming to retrieve him to walk him home and, overhearing his brother, grabbed Sam’s arm tightly, yanking him away._  


_“She ain’t our Ma, Sammy, don’t call her that,” he had hissed at him.  
_

_“But Dean, she said I could-”  
_

_“I. Don’t. Care. She ain’t our Mom, don’t call her that. Jo can call her that because Jo is her real kid. You ain’t so you call her Ellen like I do.”  
_

_Sam had cried all the way home and it didn’t take but ten minutes after their arrival back at the house before Bobby intercepted Dean on his way to the backyard, calling him into his office.  
_

_“Look, boy, I understand that you remember your folks and you still miss ‘em. That is perfectly alright. We didn’t bring you into our family to force you to forget ‘em. But Ellen and I love you boys and you have no right to be telling that child that Ellen don’t love him like he was her own. You ain’t gotta call us nothing but Ellen and Bobby - as long as you respect me and my wife, I don’t care. But you let Sam make that decision on his own.”  
_

_Dean had grumbled as he walked away but didn’t say a word the next time he heard Sam call Ellen “mom.”  
_

_It was eight and a half months later when Ellen was woken up with a phone call at three in the morning by an officer telling her that Dean Winchester had gotten caught trespassing with a bottle of liquor in his possession. When she showed up at the station, Dean looked nervous, but she didn’t say anything. She signed the paperwork and led him to the car, staying silent throughout the drive as Dean grew more and more fidgety. Five minutes away from the house, the teen burst.  
_

_“Look, I know what happens next. You gotta send me back now. And that’s fine, I understand, I ain’t mad. But here’s the thing, I ain’t leaving without Sammy and even if I would, he wouldn’t stay without me. He likes y’all a whole lot though and he’s gonna be real upset. So I’m going to need you guys to let me be the one to tell him that we gotta leave ‘cause he’s gotta hear it from me,” Dean rambled, not giving Ellen a chance to interrupt him before he was done. But there wasn’t a risk of that, as she didn’t open her mouth until the car was parked in the driveway.  
_

_“Boy, you ain’t stupid so don’t act like you are,” she declared, turning in her seat to face him. The look on Dean’s face changed from anxious to bewildered.  
_

_“What-”  
_

_“Dean Winchester, that is not how this works. You don’t get ‘sent back’ the second you screw up. That’s not how family works,” she said sternly. Dean still looked confused and she sighed, reaching for the boy’s hand and giving it a tight squeeze. “You and Sam aren’t going anywhere. You’re in trouble, Dean, but that doesn’t mean you have to leave. None of us want you to leave, son. You are our family and family doesn’t turn their backs on each other,” she explained, a bit more gentle than before.  
_

_Dean will never admit that he started crying right there in Ellen’s pickup truck at four in the morning, but he did. And Ellen would never dare tell on him. In that moment, she just pulled him in close, giving him a tight hug. “I love you, Dean, whether you love me back or not. You will forever be a part of this family unless you make the decision that you don’t wanna be,” she whispered in his hair, gently rocking him back and forth.  
_

_“I love you too, Momma,” he mumbled against her shoulder as he clung tightly to her.  
_

_Ellen Harvelle cried right then and there, but Dean would never dare tell._


	2. Sealing Sammy's Fate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't get me wrong, I LOVE a good slow burn.  
> This just isn't one of them. xxx

**(Six weeks later)**

Lucifer groaned as he slumped over his desk, glancing at the clock on the wall for the twentieth time in the past hour. It had only steadily gotten later with no results to prove for it. He had promised himself that he could go home as soon as he made some kind of breakthrough, _any_ breakthrough on this case. He got up to go to the bathroom, freezing when he heard rustling coming from the breakroom. At this time of night, he had presumed he was the only one still in the office. 

“Hello?” Lucifer called out, standing alert. A moment later, a giant poked his sleepy head out of the kitchen. 

“Hey, sorry if I scared you. I’m just making another cup of coffee,” Sam explained, looking sheepish. 

“It’s almost one in the morning, Sam,” Lucifer chasitized hypocritically. 

“The Johnson case isn’t going to work itself out,” he said with a shrug. Lucifer couldn’t help but chuckle. Of course the damn intern had also been working on the Johnson case. Kid never took a damn break. 

“Make me a cup too and meet me back in my office,” Lucifer muttered, heading off to the bathroom.  


* * *

It was exactly 2:04am when Sam Winchester finished his breathless announcement on how they were to win the case. Lucifer had listened intently, following the paper trail as Sam rapidly moved through it, the young man way too awake for the hour. 

Perhaps it was the time. Perhaps he was delirious. Perhaps it was the caffeine. Perhaps it was just because he had been working on this case with no end in sight for way too long. Either way, Lucifer cupped Sam’s face between his hands with a bright smile. 

“Sam Winchester, you are a genius!” He shouted, immediately pressing their lips together. When he pulled back, Sam was staring at him with wide eyes and Lucifer only then came to his senses about what he had just done. He had just kissed his intern. Sam could report him for sexual assault and it’d be the end of his career. Before he could open his mouth to apologize though, Sam was pulling him back in for an enthusiastic kiss. Their tongues danced, hands roamed, and papers were knocked off of the desk as the two continued their hands-on search of each other’s bodies. Lucifer bit the boy’s bottom lip between his teeth, dragging his teeth across it slowly and dragging out the most beautiful moan from Sam’s mouth. Once the two finally fell apart, Sam Winchester looked properly debauched. 

“Well that was a first kiss to remember,” Lucifer mumbled, more to himself than to Sam, watching the younger as he turned pink and moved to pick up the papers that had fallen to the floor. “Hey, I’ll worry about that tomorrow,” Lucifer murmured, a hand on Sam’s arm to get him to stop cleaning up the mess they had made. Sam looked at the papers scattered along the floor for a moment before shrugging. They gathered their belongings instead and made their way out to the car lot, hand-in-hand and pausing multiple times in their walk in order to kiss again. 

“Where’s your car?” Lucifer asked him and Sam shrugged sheepishly. 

“I try not to drive to work unless I have to. I like to walk, or take the bus if the weather’s rough,” he explained quietly. “I was just gonna walk home.” 

“I’ll drive you.” 

“You don’t have to-” 

“Sam, I’m _offering_. And, if there is any way in hell that I can convince you to let me drive you to my house instead, then I will be trying my best. But I will also gladly drive you to your home and drop you off at the door like a perfect gentleman.” 

Sam knew he should’ve said that he’d like to be taken to his own apartment. This was his boss. Hell, it wasn’t even just a higher-up at the firm, he was the fucking owner, the damn namesake of the firm. If things went south, the man could blacklist him from every law firm in the state of California. 

“Take me home with you,” Sam answered, dropping his briefcase as he was pushed against Lucifer’s car for another kiss. 

“Okay, okay, get in before I get distracted again,” Lucifer groaned when he pulled away, picking up Sam’s briefcase for him. He looked at the object in his hands long enough for Sam to get uncomfortable and he gently took it back with a word of gratitude. 

When they were on the way to Lucifer’s house, Sam began to get nervous, unsure if he had made the right call. Lucifer picked up on the strong change in demeanor and held out a hand for Sam to take. 

“Hey, this doesn’t have to happen,” he reminded his intern, squeezing his hand. 

“No, no, don’t get me wrong, Mr. Ali-” 

“Stop right there. You don’t get to kiss me like _that_ and then still call me by my surname,” Lucifer teased, getting a smile out of Sam for the first time during their car ride. 

“Fine. Don’t get me wrong, _Lucifer_ , I’ve found you attractive since before we even met face-to-face. And afterwards, I mean, I just didn’t think something like this, someone like you, would ever want someone like me.” 

“You are a beautiful man, Sam Winchester. I don’t know who has led you to believe otherwise, but I will make it my job tonight to make you realize it yourself,” he said, flashing the younger a devilish smirk. Lucifer loved the way Sam’s cheeks painted themselves red in response. 

It was less than twenty minutes later when Lucifer pushed Sam against the door of his bedroom, kissing him for all he was worth. Sam reached down, grabbing the back of Lucifer’s thighs and hoisting him up, using his size to his advantage. He put his boss down once they reached the bed and he crawled over top of him, kissing him hungrily as he hovered above him. To his surprise, Lucifer easily flipped them around, straddling Sam’s hips as if he was always meant to be there. 

“No, no, no, Sam Winchester… I’m treating you, remember?” Lucifer whispered, unbuttoning Sam’s shirt. 

And oh God, did he fucking treat him that night. 

* * *

The first person to find out about their love affair was Meg, Lucifer’s personal secretary. 

\--

“Ah, Winchester. What can I do for you?” Meg asked as Sam came into her office space. Her area blocked the way to Mr. Alighieri as it was her job to make sure that he wasn’t bothered unnecessarily. 

“Mr. Novak just sent me up with a file that he needs Mr. Alighieri to take a look at. I’m not to come back downstairs without his signature,” Sam responded, holding up the file that one of the partners in the firm had put into his care. Meg eyed him before pressing a button on the office phone and within seconds, Lucifer’s voice came through the small speaker on the phone. 

“I already told you to tell that goddamn judge that I will be down at the courthouse when I have the damn time to-” he growled over the phone and Sam snickered quietly. 

“Luci, darling, it’s not about Judge Miller,” Meg purred into the phone, the only person in the office brave enough to ever interrupt the man, much less call him pet names. “I have the long-haired intern here with a file from Mr. Novak. It contains…” she paused, glancing up at Sam for the answer to finish that statement. 

“The final tax statements of the month,” Sam filled in helpfully. 

“Send him in, Meg,” he ordered before canceling the connection. Meg gestured towards the door behind her. 

“You heard him. The King says you may enter,” she said with a smirk, turning back to her computer screen. Sam ignored her antics and let himself into the office, closing the door behind himself. 

“Mr. Alig-” 

“Nobody can hear you, Sammy,” Lucifer reminded him, looking at Sam as if he wanted to eat him. “What do you have for me?” 

Sam set the file down on the man’s desk and Lucifer opened it, flipping through the pages with a sigh. 

“You couldn’t have brought me anything fun?” Lucifer whined and Sam shrugged. 

“I don’t get to decide that. I just carry out the orders,” he said, leaning against the side of the desk. Lucifer made a face before grabbing a pen and beginning to sign the bottom of each page. When he finished, he held out the file but pulled it back before Sam’s hand could close around it. 

“Seal it with a kiss?” Lucifer asked, for the dozenth time since their first night together a few days ago. With an eye roll, Sam leaned forwards, giving his boss a quick kiss before pulling away. Or, attempting to pull away, as Lucifer’s hand had found his tie and tugged him right back in. 

“A proper kiss, Sammy,” the man complained and Sam couldn’t help but comply after seeing the pouty look on Lucifer’s face. Lucifer quickly stood to keep Sam from having to lean down so far, wrapping his arms around the man’s neck and pulling him in closer. What was the point of an office romance if he couldn’t enjoy it in the privacy of his own office? 

“Fuck, Luce,” Sam groaned, tilting his head as the older man bit at his neck. The edge of the desk was pressing into Sam’s back in a horrifically uncomfortable way but in that moment, he didn’t care. Lucifer’s lips were _everywhere_ , setting a fire ablaze on Sam’s skin wherever they touched. 

Not that Sam was complaining. How could he complain when Lucifer was- “Oh, Luce, fuck, we can’t,” he panted out as he felt expert fingers undoing his pants. Lucifer shot him a wicked smile that would make even his namesake shudder as he sunk to his knees and swirled his tongue around the tip of Sam’s cock. Sam moaned loudly and Lucifer pulled back to shush him teasingly before taking as much of Sam’s length as he could in one go, sealing Sam’s fate. Feeling his knees buckle, Sam reached behind him for purchase, his hands scrambling to keep him up. One hand just landed on some papers while the other landed on the phone. 

Ignoring any and all outside factors, Sam became a whimpering mess from Lucifer’s mouth, watching the man as he sucked his cock like it was his God-given duty. “Luci, baby, I can’t… fuck… I can’t, it’s too much… m’gonna…” Sam chanted, gasping for oxygen. Lucifer didn’t pull back, if anything, he got more enthusiastic. Sam spilled his seed straight into Lucifer’s mouth, shouting as he did so. Luce sucked him dry and while Sam started to recover, began to carefully tuck the intern back into his pants as if nothing had ever happened. 

Both jumped when a sarcastic, feminine voice came through the speaker on the phone. “So, does this count as phone sex or…?” 

Sam turned pale while Lucifer jumped to cut the connection with Meg. The room was quiet for a solid minute before Lucifer started giggling. 

“Luce, it’s not funny! She just heard us!” 

“On the contrary, she heard you and that makes it very funny,” Lucifer corrected with a smirk. Before Sam could fuss back, Lucifer kissed him as a distraction. 

“Just so you know, if Meg knows, the whole office will know in a matter of hours,” Lucifer warned, mumbling the statement against Sam’s lips as if to keep him from panicking. It didn’t work. 

“If people know, then they’re going to think that you only picked me as an intern because we’re fucking. It’s only been over a month since I started, they could think we’ve been hiding it since the beginning. And the other interns are going to hate me because they’ll think I’ve slept my way into getting a position here while they worked their asses off for it and the partners aren’t even going to take me seriously anymore and-” Sam’s breathing was getting faster and faster as he rushed through all the possibilities of what could happen when the office found out that they were fucking. Lucifer grabbed Sam’s shoulders, kissing him once more in an attempt to shut him up. When he pulled away, he cupped Sam’s cheeks in his hands. 

“Sam… Sam, look at me… Good. Okay, here’s the thing. Nobody is going to dare treat you any differently because then they’ll have to explain themselves to me, do you understand? As long as we aren’t making out in the breakroom or fucking over the conference table, then we will be fine,” Lucifer assured him, moving one hand to stroke Sam’s hair. 

It wasn’t helping much. “It’s not fine, Lucifer. We’ve fucked and now everybody’s going to think I’m some kind of office whore, fucking anyone it’ll take to get ahead,” Sam urged, pulling away from Lucifer’s touch. 

“Sam, did you fuck me to get ahead in your career?” Lucifer asked simply, the incantation in his voice impossible to decipher. 

“What? No! Of course not! I’m not like that, Luce, how could-” Sam started, bewildered and slightly hurt. 

“I know that, Sam. And you know that too. So why does it matter if that’s what they think? I care about you. I’ve thought about you every second of every day since we first kissed, Sam. I want to see where this takes us but if you’re so worried about what the rest of the world thinks, it’s going to take us straight into the ground,” the man explained, the calm to Sam’s storm. Sam slowly stepped back into Lucifer’s reach, laying a hand on the man’s waist. Suddenly beaming, Lucifer cupped Sam’s cheeks and kissed him gently. 

“Let’s make this real, yeah? Me and you? We’ll lay out some work boundaries later, tonight at my place. But let’s make this something real,” he offered, foreheads pressed together. Sam’s smile immediately cured the anxiety in Lucifer’s stomach from voicing the words. 

“I’d like that,” Sam whispered, placing a hand in Lucifer’s hair. 

“Yeah?” 

“Of course.” 

“Who knows, you may just be my _last_ first kiss,” Lucifer said with a smirk, giving him a quick kiss and a smack on the bum before releasing him, picking up the file. “You should probably get this back to Gabriel, yeah?” He asked with a grin. 

Sam reluctantly took it, despite not wanting to leave Lucifer’s side after that. When he left Luci- Mr. Alighieri’s office, he blatantly ignored the wolf whistle that Meg let out, walking straight to the staircase and making his way back to Mr. Novak with the file. As soon as he set it down on the man’s desk, Mr. Novak grinned up at him. 

“Oh this is going to be fun,” Mr. Novak said, clapping his hands together as Sam groaned and retreated to his own desk.


	3. Meeting the Brothers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here, have the beginnings of some Destiel ~
> 
> I'd love to hear feedback. Otherwise, enjoy! xxx

The next ones - outside of the office - to find out about the blossoming relationship were their brothers, of course. Sam had blown off Dean’s concern when he hadn’t come home that first night, making the excuse that he had stayed the night at the firm. The excuses were harder and harder to come by as he began to stay with Lucifer more and more, sometimes not even on purpose. A dinner date after work would turn into something more, whether it was sex or one of the multiple times where Sam would wake up in the middle of the night to discover that they had fallen asleep on the couch watching a movie. Sam was also being dropped off from a very fancy car in the early mornings, sometimes coming in only long enough to change clothes before dashing back out into the car and driving off. In the evenings, that same car would drop him off once more. 

So Dean was confused, to say the least. At first, he was just pissy, trashing Sam’s boss as much as he could for making him work so many all-nighters. But as he noticed the car more and more and saw that his brother wasn’t nearly as sleep-deprived as he should’ve been, he realized that he was missing part of the story. His questions on where Sam had been weren’t being truthfully answered and one day, finding Sam in the kitchen right after work, Dean quickly cornered him against two cabinets. 

“God so help me, Sam Winchester, if you don’t tell me what is going on with you right now, I will call Ma and Jo. And if you think for a second that they won’t jump straight on a plane and fly their asses out here from Kansas to come and get some answers out of you, you are seriously mistaken,” Dean threatened as he pressed one hand against Sam’s chest to keep him from going anywhere. Sam just glared at him for a moment, not appreciating Dean’s forceful approach, but soon softened when he reminded himself that Dean was just doing his Dean thing. Sam sighed and moved Dean’s hand, sliding out from between him and the counter and grabbing two beers out of the fridge. 

“Dean, I have a boyfriend. That’s it. There’s no grand scheme, I’m not running away to Mexico without you, I’m just seeing someone. It’s new and I’m still exploring and I just didn’t want to say anything yet, you know?” Sam explained, sitting down at the table. Dean planted both hands down on the table in front of Sam, raising an eyebrow. 

“You’ve been keeping secrets from me because of a damn boyfriend? If you dare say you thought I’d get mad that you were seeing a guy or some shit, I’m going to punch you in the face,” Dean grumbled. 

“What? No! It’s just that… I’m seeing Mr. Alighieri. And I just wanted to wait a bit. I was testing the waters and making sure he was someone to call home about, that’s it,” Sam rushed to clarify. 

“Sam, I’m your brother. I don’t care if it’s a fucking one night stand, you can tell me. Someone you’ve been seeing multiple times is definitely someone that you should- Wait. Who?” 

“Mr. Alighieri.” 

“Mr. Alighieri… As in Alighieri Law, Mr. Alighieri?” 

“That would be the one.” 

“ _Lucifer_ Alighieri?” 

“Yes, Dean.” 

Dean stayed quiet for a long time after that. He couldn’t decide if he was impressed that Sammy was dating the bossman or if he was upset that the older man may be taking advantage of his little brother. He finally crossed his arms and leaned back against the counter. 

“I need to meet this dude and see what he’s up to.” 

“He’s not up to anything, Dean. It’s too soon for you guys to meet.” 

“If you’re fucking him, it’s not too soon!” 

“It’s too soon, Dean. I’ll let you know when it’s time, yeah? Until then, refrain from calling Ma, yeah? She’ll be so excited that I’m seeing someone that they’ll be hearing wedding bells all the way from Kansas.”  


* * *

A week and a half later, Sam found himself on Lucifer’s sofa after work, sipping on tea and scrolling through a document. His laptop was propped up on the arm of the couch since Lucifer had decided that Sam’s lap was the perfect place for his feet. In retaliation, Sam had propped up his own on the coffee table, ignoring his boyfriend’s protests about his nice furniture. 

“My legs have to go somewhere, Luce,” he said, flashing him a grin. 

“The floor, Sam, the floor!” 

“Your table is too close to the couch for it to be comfortable. It’s like I’m stuck on an airplane with no leg room.” It wasn’t that bad, but he also loved teasing his man relentlessly. “Besides, I thought you’d give up fighting me about it by now.” With a huff, Lucifer turned back to the file in his lap, picking up his highlighter once more. Sam could _break_ the coffee table and Lucifer wouldn’t really care at all. 

Sam absentmindedly stroked the cotton of Lucifer’s pajama pants after both had gone back to their readings. They were both more than ready to go to bed but having dipped out of work a little earlier than usual, catching up was necessary to keep the rest of the week running smoothly. 

“My brother wants to meet you,” Lucifer said abruptly, looking up from his case file to see Sam’s face. Before Sam could react, he launched into an explanation. “My little brother, Castiel… He started asking why I was acting different lately and I told him about you and now he’s curious and wishes to meet you. He’s odd but he means well. I think you’ll really like him.” 

Sam gave Lucifer’s leg a squeeze, giving him a bright smile. “Dean has been bugging me nonstop for over a week to meet you too.” 

“Why didn’t you say something? We could’ve done dinner over the weekend, we weren’t doing anything,” Luce asked, raising an eyebrow. 

“I don’t know. He’s a bit.. Much. Especially when it comes to anyone I’m seeing. And I didn’t really care to have him threatening you and whatnot. I wanted to have you to myself a bit longer, make sure you wouldn’t be scared off by him.” 

“Are you suggesting that I could possibly be scared off by anyone, much less your brother?” 

“When he gets into big brother mode-” 

“I can handle him, Sam.” 

“Well, what about Castiel? What have you told him about me? Does he know that I’m an intern or did you just tell him that I worked in your office? I’m sure he won’t be happy to know that his brother’s new boyfriend is substantially younger and in an inferior position,” Sam said nervously, beginning to mess with his fingers. He couldn’t decipher the look that Lucifer gave him, which only amped up his nerves. 

“Sorry, I’m just trying to figure out if you’re trying to call me old, Samuel Winchester,” Lucifer finally said, raising a sharp eyebrow at him. “‘Substantially younger?’” The color drained from Sam’s face as he scrambled to set the laptop down and turn towards Lucifer completely, shaking his head. 

“No, no, Luci, that’s not what I-” Sam was cut off by Lucifer’s chuckles and cold hands gripped his cheeks. 

“Shush. I know, I was just giving you a hard time,” he promised, leaning into kiss him. “I think it’s about time to introduce each other to our siblings, yes?” 

* * *

That’s how the couple found themselves sitting at a nice restaurant with Dean that Sunday evening. There was an empty chair at their table that Lucifer kept glancing at nervously, checking his watch repeatedly. Dean had been grumbling about being hungry but Sam shushed him, hissing at him that he could wait. Fifteen minutes after Lucifer’s brother was supposed to have joined them, Lucifer turned to the Winchester boys, sighing. 

“I’m sure he’ll be here soon. He’s not one to be late; I’m sure he has a good reason. Why don’t we go ahead and order an appetizer, he’ll probably-” Lucifer was still speaking when a man with messy black hair and bright blue eyes rushed up to the table. 

“I am so sorry that I am late, I hope that you haven’t been waiting too long,” he apologized frantically, taking a seat. 

“M’fucking starving, of course we’ve- OW!” Dean glared at his little brother from across the table, who had just bruised his shin indefinitely. 

Castiel looked at both brothers and even though his eyes lingered on Dean’s face for a few seconds too long, he held out his hand for Sam. “You’re the one that has roped in my brother, yes? I’m Castiel, it’s nice to meet you,” he said with a smile. Introductions were made and food was ordered, quickly bringing the group at ease once more now that Lucifer wasn’t worried about his own little brother and Dean was being fed. 

“So Sam, you work with Lucifer, yes?” Castiel asked before taking a bite of his salad. 

“I do! I’m in my final year of school at Stanford. Since Alighieri Law only accepts third-year interns, I did rolling internships up until this year before wiggling my way into a spot as a year-long intern with Luce,” Sam explained. “And what about you? What do you do, Castiel?” 

“I’m a pediatric surgeon down at the hospital.” 

Dean groaned, making a face. “Son of a bitch. I’m surrounded by lawyers and a fucking baby surgeon and then there’s me and I’m not sure I can even pronounce the name of the wine you’re drinking.” 

Castiel frowned and tilted his head, looking at Dean. “Well, what do you do, Dean?” 

The man turned slightly pink, accentuating his freckles, and rubbed the back of his neck, embarrassed. “I’m just a mechanic. I own my own garage.” 

Castiel’s eyes lit up as if Dean had said that he was the most recent Nobel Peace Prize winner. 

“Oh! The reason I was late is because my car wouldn’t start. I finally had to just give up and take the bus. Does your shop tow? I’m sure you’re wonderful at what you do,” Castiel started and Dean grinned widely. 

“I can come and take a look for you after dinner, if you’d want? It’d give me a chance to prove that I’m not completely useless, even without years of student debt,” Dean offered, causing both of them to laugh. Lucifer watched the interaction with narrowed eyes until Sam laid his hand over top of his boyfriend’s. 

“Luce, stop it,” Sam whispered, chiding his partner for looking at Dean so angrily. 

“He’s flirting with my baby brother,” he muttered in response, frowning. 

“Yeah, well, you’re fucking his baby brother. I think you’re even… if it helps, Cas is looking at him like he hung the moon, so I don’t think he minds.” 

Sam honestly thought it was adorable, the way that Castiel and Dean got on. Well, it was, at first. Until the two practically forgot that their brothers were sitting across from them for the sole purpose of an introductory dinner. 

By the end of the night, neither Dean nor Lucifer knew which one of them was supposed to give the shovel talk.


	4. Get Dressed, We're Going to Court

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise there's a real plotline coming along. Enjoy the more fluffy stuff for a bit though, yeah? 
> 
> Enjoy! xxx

Come Monday morning, Sam found himself clutching a travel mug full of coffee to his chest as he made his way into the conference room, side by side with Kevin Tran, another intern. Lucifer was holding a meeting with the partners of the firm and because the interns mostly helped the partners and not the associates, they were required to be there as well. The five of them sat at the far end of the long table, jotting down notes about what was said. Most of the meeting was merely delegation and Sam had partially tuned out his boyfriend/boss, doodling in the corner of his notebook. 

“The defense for the Johnson case starts first thing tomorrow morning. Mr. Winchester will be assisting me with the case, so do not expect his assistance within the next week,” he heard Lucifer say and he looked up, surprise written all over his face. Assisting Mr. Alighieri in court was a coveted position and so far, none of the interns had been allowed to do so. Being the first caused a few whispers on the partner’s side of the table and a couple nasty looks from the intern side. Lucifer caught on before Sam could and stood up even straighter, shooting an icy glare down both sides of the table until all attention was sheepishly back on himself. 

“Mr. Winchester will be joining me in the courtroom because he was the one who assisted in preparing the case in its earlier stages. If anyone has a problem with my decision, they may address me, now,” Lucifer said sharply, making eye contact with a few people at the table as Sam turned pink in his seat and attempted to make himself smaller. Nobody had anything to say to the owner of the firm, of course, and the meeting shortly adjourned after that, with everybody except for Sam and Lucifer filing out of the room. 

“You didn’t tell me that I would be joining you in court,” Sam said hesitantly, leaning against the table near where he had been sitting and watching Lucifer gather his belongings. 

“I haven’t had time.” 

“We were together all weekend.” 

“Okay, I had time, but I was attempting the whole, ‘let’s leave work out of our personal lives the best that we can,’ thing. Are you bothered?” 

“I just don’t want people to think that-” 

“Stop it. I handled it. You were the one who stayed at the office, upon your own initiative, and tried to find what we needed to win the case. Not only tried, but you are the one who figured it out, not me. Whether we’re together or not, you deserve it,” Lucifer interrupted, fussing at the taller man. 

“Lucifer, I appreciate your faith in me, but-” he started once more but stopped talking when his boyfriend gave him a signature glare. “Okay, okay. Thank you, Luce,” he surrendered, lifting both hands as a small smile revealed itself. 

“You should get to work. I’d reeeeeally appreciate it if you could manage to get done early today. Perhaps around four?” Lucifer asked, his hands finding Sam’s hips as he gave him a puppy-dog look. 

“Wait, why? I didn’t think we had anything planned for tonight.” 

“We’re going shopping, my love.” 

Sam gave his boyfriend a suspicious look, raising an eyebrow. “What for?” 

“Something to wear.” 

“Lucifer, I have clothes.” 

“You need court clothes, Sam.”’ 

“I have a nice suit for court!” 

“Under whose definition of nice?” Lucifer asked, then immediately regretted it when he saw the look on Sam’s face. He began to backpedal, quickly. “Sam, I just want to treat you. You deserve so much more than the world has given you. If I want to get you a few nice things, please let me. Let me spoil my boyfriend,” he said, his voice a lot softer than it was just moments ago. 

“I don’t need your charity.” 

“Who said anything about charity? I’m just a man trying to spoil his lover.” 

“I didn’t ask for a sugar daddy either.” 

“Sam!” Lucifer exclaimed, exasperated. “I am more than aware that you are the kind of man who wouldn’t ask for a bucket of water if you were on fire. But you aren’t asking, I’m trying to gift something to you and you won’t take it.” He was holding onto Sam’s face at this point since the younger man kept trying to avoid eye contact. “I know that you do not need anything from me. But I truly want to spoil you. Please let me,” he murmured softly, pressing a kiss to his cheek. 

Sam sighed, rubbing the back of his neck as he chewed on his lip, trying to decide on an answer. He finally threw his hands up, looking Lucifer in the eyes with a hint of a smile. 

“Fine. We’ll go shopping,” Sam muttered, earning himself a very enthusiastic kiss from his boyfriend. Sam was the first to pull away, laughing as he took a step back. “Okay, okay, I’ve gotta get back to work since somebody wants to sneak me out early,” he said accusingly, gathering his things. 

“Work hard and play harder, Sammy!” Lucifer called after him as he slid out the door, earning himself a middle finger from Sam as he passed by the room’s window. 

* * *

**[TO: Dean W.]**

**Remind me never to go shopping with Lucifer ever again. SW**

_That bad? DW_

**Worse. SW**

**I’ve been measured so extensively that I think I’m getting a full body cast, not an outfit. What happened to grabbing your size and moving on with your day? SW**

_Sounds like you hit the big leagues now, Sammy. What are you buying anyways? DW_

**Luce is buying me a suit. Says I need to look presentable for court. SW**

_Court? You just carrying his shit around or are you actually doing something? DW_

**Actually doing something, Dean. I suppose that’s why he’s having me play dress-up. SW**

_Perks of dating the bossman, huh? DW_

**Fuck off.SW**

_Oh come on. What’s the point of fucking the man in charge if you don’t even get to enjoy a little perk here or there? DW_

**The point is that I care about him. A lot. I don’t give a shit who he is, so shut the hell up, Dean. SW**

_Oh come on, you know I’m just messing with you. DW_

**Can’t deal with it from you too while everybody at work is whispering the same kind of shit behind my back. SW**

_Do I need to come kick somebody’s ass? DW_

**No. I’m fine. Do you want to do dinner tonight? SW**

_Uh, I’m kinda meeting Cas… DW_

_I can cancel, if you want? DW_

**No, no, of course not. Should probably be preparing for court with Luce anyways. SW**

**Didn’t you have lunch with Cas yesterday? SW**

**Could’ve swore you texted me something about his scrubs. ]SW**

_They had monster trucks on them! He’s such a little dork. DW_

_Man’s gotta eat. Might as well do it in good company. DW_

**Mhm… That’s it. SW**

_Fuck off. DW_

**You met him on Friday night and went over to his after dinner. You had lunch with him yesterday and now you’re having dinner with him tonight? That makes for three dates in 72 hours. SW**

_Not a date. DW_

_Go get your fucking monkey suit. DW_

**Have fun with the doc, Dean! SW**

* * *

Sam would’ve kept happily bothering his brother regarding his status with Castiel, but he only gave up because Lucifer was looking at him rather impatiently. He had started off ignoring that too but when the foot tap started, he knew it was time to give the man back his attention. 

“It was Dean,” he defended as he got up, wrapping his arms around the man’s waist and propping his chin on his shoulder. 

“Oh, you mean the man defiling my baby brother? Makes it so much better,” he grumped, crossing his arms instead of melting into the embrace. 

“Your brother is a grown man, Luci. And he’s merely returning the favor,” Sam pointed out, kissing the man’s temple before letting go of him. “So what are we doing now? Don’t they have everything they need from me?” 

“Yes, but I need you to pick out some ties.” 

“I have-” Sam stopped his protesting after seeing the look Lucifer shot him. “Okay, ties it is,” he relented, heading over to the display. He picked up two black ones, one skinnier than the other, and then shrugged. “Five seconds, Luce, that’s all it took.” The older man groaned loudly and took both ties from Sam, placing them back on the display. 

“Sam, you have black ties.” 

“That’s what I was trying to tell you!” 

“You are allowed a bit of color with your ties. In fact, it’s preferable. C’mere,” Lucifer explained and began holding up a multitude of ties to Sam’s chest, looking to see which ones went best with his hair and eyes. By the time he was done, he had an array flung over his arm and Sam raised an eyebrow. 

“You are aware I only have one neck, right?” 

“Shh. You’re going to look positively _edible_ when I’m done with you.” 

\-- 

They left with one full suit in hand, having waited until it was tailored to meet Sam’s needs because, “ _Really, Sam, a man of your size truly needs a tailored suit._ ” Sam was as satisfied as he could be, considering it seemed like Lucifer didn’t go too overboard. Except for the damn ties, for some reason. He had been shooed out of the store to go get Lucifer’s car while he paid and he couldn’t even find it in himself to protest. He didn’t want to see the final total. Perhaps he should’ve stayed, as the final cost could’ve tipped him off to what Lucifer had actually done, but hindsight is always 20/20. 

By the time he had pulled the car out of the parking garage and to the storefront, Lucifer was strolling out with the suit bag and hung it up in the backseat. When Sam didn’t move to get out of the driver’s seat, Lucifer raised an eyebrow at him, causing the larger man to laugh. 

“Oh come on. You trusted me enough to go and get it.” 

“I trust a valet enough to drive her that distance, Sammy.” 

“You sound just like Dean, you know that right?” 

“Get out of the driver’s seat.” 

“You owe me! I have been pinched and prodded and had random strangers touch me everywhere since four-thirty! It’s been hours, Luce!” This must’ve been enough to convince him because even though he didn’t get an answer, a very grumpy Lucifer resigned to sitting in the passenger’s seat. 

“Then I’m picking dinner.” 

* * *

Sam had been in the courtroom before. Obviously, you don’t get to be a third-year law student without doing so. But most of the time, an intern’s job was to carry the acting lawyer’s belongings, sit in the first row behind the table, and take thorough notes of everything that happened. He had also seen Lucifer in the courtroom before. He had watched from the front row on the opposite side of him as he spoke, weaving his webs and make the jury positively melt over his intelligence (and sometimes, his appearance as well). It was well-known that the interns at Alighieri Law assisted in the courtroom, sitting at the table and even getting a chance to speak as well. It was rare when Mr. Alighieri himself had shown up and allowed an intern to argue, but it did happen. 

So he shouldn’t have been as dumbstruck as he was on their first day with the case. They had spent hours last night going over everything that would happen. Sam knew the case inside and out, he knew the argument because he had been the one to discover it. Lucifer had perfected it, of course, ironing out the details and finding the extra information necessary in the time between that night and the trial date. He had been feeling good that morning as they got dressed and he even almost let it slip to Lucifer how much he actually liked the new suit. It fit him perfectly, clinging in all the right places but never too tight. He felt powerful. 

He did **not** feel powerful once they were at the courthouse. He had tried to take Lucifer’s briefcase for him when they were stepping out of the car but his boyfriend merely scowled at him, taking it back. When he walked two steps behind him, Lucifer allowed it for perhaps thirty seconds before giving him a look. 

“How am I supposed to speak to you when you are behind me?” 

“Oh. Uh.. Sorry,” he muttered, scrambling to Lucifer’s side. He left a professional amount of space between them, the two already having discussed that there would be no fraternizing at the courthouse. They couldn’t afford the attention it would bring. 

“Breathe, Winchester. You are fine. We have this.”

\--

God, watching Lu- Mr. Alighieri in the courtroom was an even more beautiful sight up close. He may be biased, of course, but it was difficult to keep his eyes off the man as he walked the length of the floor, giving his opening statement and practically charming the pants off of the jury in the meantime. The Johnson murder trial was highly publicized in the weeks leading up to it and the room was full of people - lawyers, family and friends, interested actors in the criminal justice system, and a few reporters. 

Sam was enraptured and when it was announced that they were breaking for the day and would resume in the morning, he was surprised. It hadn’t felt like that much time had passed. As each day passed, Sam was falling deeper for the man who _owned_ that courtroom. 

After the opening on day four of the trial, the judge offered Mr. Alighieri a chance to cross-examine the witness whose interrogation had been wrapped up with the ending of court the day before. Sam looked over at Lucifer as he stood, then turned his attention to a few documents that were laid out in front of him. 

“Mr. Winchester will be performing the cross-examination on Ms. Carter,” Lucifer announced and it took everything in Sam not to visibly react. He was saved by the opposing lawyer throwing a hand in the air. 

“Your honor, I object. He is just an intern and for a case of this caliber, it’s absurd!” He exclaimed, leading the judge to quiet the room and take a look through the papers on his stand. 

“Mr. Winchester’s name is listed on my docket as an acting lawyer. He may proceed.” 

“Then I request a recess.” Their day had barely even started yet but it seemed as though Judge Miller was already done with the drama, as he entertained the request. Sam and Lucifer exited the room silently and Sam waited until they found a secluded hallway before he spoke. 

“Do you want to explain what the hell is going on?” 

“...You’re doing the cross-examination of the witness?” 

“And you just wanted to throw me up there with no warning? I can’t do this.” 

“Sam, you spoke for two hours yesterday about what you would say if you could get your hands on the witness. Here’s your shot.” 

“I didn’t actually want to!” 

“Don’t lie to me.” 

“I. Can’t. Do. This.” 

Lucifer’s expression went from encouraging boyfriend to angry boss in about five seconds flat. There was a very tense silence between the two of them for a solid moment before Lucifer finally opened his mouth. 

“Then leave.” 

“What? Leave the courthouse? We’re in the middle of a trial!” Sam exclaimed, flabbergasted. 

“Leave the courthouse, leave my law firm,” Lucifer responded, giving him a shrug and gesturing towards the door. 

“Lucifer, I-” 

“If my third-year intern can’t handle a cross-examination of a witness, then he’s chosen to intern at the wrong law firm.” 

“You can’t be serious.” 

“Do I look like a man who’s joking?” 

“I _deserve_ to be here, Lucifer. I’ve worked my ass off for years, for my entire life, for this career. I-” 

“Then prove it.”


	5. I Love You(r Faith in Me)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One: I am not a law professional and the beginning of this chapter will probably reveal that. Forgive me and just recognize that Sam is a badass, yeah?  
> Two: Heads up for some smut in the middle of the chapter! 
> 
> Enjoy! xxx

Lucifer Alighieri was a magician in a courtroom and many knew it. What they didn’t know was that Sam Winchester was a goddamn force to be reckoned with. Fueled by the fire that Lucifer had lit under his ass, Sam had marched back into the courtroom with a taste for blood. 

\--

“Ms. Carter, thank you for your patience. I apologize that you had to take another day to join us here today and I’ll try to make this brief. You were called by the defense team because you witnessed an altercation between Mr. Johnson and the victim, Alexander Simmons, earlier in the day prior to Simmons’ death?” 

“Yes, that is correct.” 

“And where did you see this altercation take place?” 

“They traveled from the crosswalk and further down the street towards my home. I saw through the window.” 

“And you live on Elderberry Drive, is that correct?” 

“Yes.” 

“And there are four houses between yours and the crosswalk, is that correct?” 

“There are, yes.” 

“And were there cars parked on the north side of Elderberry?” 

“I’m not very good with directions..” 

“Forgive me then. Were there cars parked on the opposite side of the road from your house?” 

“Yes, yes there were.” 

“And I’d like to make sure that it is clear that Elderberry Drive goes east and west. Can you confirm that for me please?” 

“Yes, it does.” 

“Thank you, Ms. Carter. Now, regarding where you were at the time of the incident. You were standing in front of your window - how wide would you say your window is?” 

The question earned him an odd look from the witness and he internally sighed, realizing the answer would need to be prompted. He used his hands to show approximately the width he knew the window to be. 

“Would you say the window is about this wide?” 

“Yes, that looks about right.” 

“Can you confirm that the width of the window is between two and a half and three feet wide?” 

“Closer to three feet, I suppose.” 

“And the window faces north?” 

“Yes.” 

“Towards the street?” 

“Yes.” 

“And it is on the west side of your house, am I correct?” 

“The west…?” 

“When you walk up towards your house, is the window on the left or on the right?” 

“It is on the right.” 

“Perfect. And stay with me for a moment - when you walk up towards your house, the window you were standing in is on the right. Which side is the crosswalk on?” 

“Uh, the left.” 

“Thank you,” he smiled at the woman in the seat before turning to Judge Miller. “Your Honor? I have an exhibit that I would like to present in order to make sure that I, Ms. Carter, and the jury are all on the same page. May I present it?” After getting the approval, Sam went back to the table, blatantly ignoring making eye contact with Lucifer. He was still pissy about their earlier conversation and honestly, he didn’t want anything he saw in Lucifer’s facial expression to determine how he continued the interrogation. He removed a photograph from his own stack of papers - Lucifer was right, he _had_ ranted about the irregularities in the witness' statement the day before and he had even worked on a visual to intensify the point he was trying to make in convincing Lucifer to be aggravated too. He was grateful that he did as he headed up to the stand where Ms. Carter was. 

“Now I just want to confirm that this is the set up of the scene in question,” he said simply, handing her the photo. It was a skyview of Ms. Carter’s block from the crosswalk to her home. There was an ‘X’ at the crosswalk and an ‘X’ to the sidewalk in front of Ms. Carter’s home with a small dotted line between them, tracing where she had said they moved from. An arrow pointed to the window that Ms. Carter had looked out from. When she confirmed that it was correct, he passed it along to Judge Miller and then the foreman of the jury. He left it with the jury as he moved back to continue. 

“Ms. Carter, I ask about dimensions and exact locations so I can ask you this: with the distance between your house and the crosswalk, can you _actually_ clearly see down to the north side of the crosswalk from that window? Especially if there are cars parked on that side of the road as well?” 

The middle-age busybody in the seat began to fidget, noticeably uncomfortable now. It seemed like the already quiet room had gone silent now, the occasional sniffle gone and the pen of someone at the defense table had stopped tapping on the table. 

“I suppose I am not sure. Is this a trick?” 

“There is no trickery, ma’am, I’m just trying to find out if you can clearly see from your window all the way down to the north side of the crosswalk.” 

There was a long pause before she answered: “I wouldn’t say _clearly._ ” There was no need to remind her that she was under oath as the connotation of her answer was clear to everyone in the room. 

“Thank you, Ms. Carter. In addition, in yesterday’s examination, you stated that you believe that Mr. Simmons, the future victim, was drunk. Is that correct?” 

“Yes.” 

“Is it safe to say that you couldn’t smell the man in question from behind your window?” 

“I couldn’t smell him, no.” 

“Could you hear him?” 

“No.” 

“Could you see if his eyes were bloodshot?” 

“Well of course I couldn’t.” 

“So can you confirm that your assessment that the victim was drunk is one that was purely made via your own judgement and not in response to anything that you saw, smell, or heard?” 

“I guess.” 

“Ma’am, I need a clear answer. Can you provide a description of physical proof for why you think that Mr. Simmons was drunk or was the decision purely a judgement call?” 

“A judgemental call.” 

“Thank you, Ms. Carter. That was everything that I needed to clear up from yesterday’s direct examination. The rest of your statement regarding the altercation that you ‘saw’ is on the record in yesterday’s transcript. That is all, Ms. Carter,” he announced, moving back to the table as she stepped down. He spared Lucifer a glance as he walked towards his seat and noticed the almost hungry look he was being given. Trying to keep from showing his self-satisfaction, he looked away and took his seat. 

His performance was all it took for Lucifer to gesture to him the next time that the prosecution’s input was necessary. And therefore, without a single look back to his boss, Sam took over the prosecution of the Johnson trial for the day. There were many moments for Lucifer to step in, to take control of the reigns once more. And if he had, Sam wouldn’t have been able to blame him - he had already done more than an intern could ever expect. 

But Lucifer never stopped him. In fact, Lucifer sat in his seat, wordless, until Judge Miller ended the session to break for the weekend. 

By the time the two left the courthouse, Sam was practically floating, jittering with excitement, his nerves on high-alert. Once they were in the car, there was a frozen moment of tension between the two as they both flashed back to the last words they had exchanged that morning. It didn’t take Sam long to turn in his seat and pull the other in for a kiss. 

“You pulled that stunt on purpose,” he accused after finally pulling back. 

“The approach I was taking wasn’t working!” Lucifer defended, a smile finally back on his face. 

“So you threaten to _fire_ me?” 

“It worked, didn’t it?” 

“Come here, you asshole,” Sam muttered, grabbing the lapels of Lucifer’s suit jacket and kissing him once more. 

* * *

* * *

The next morning, Lucifer grumbled as Sam slid out of bed way too early. He mumbled complaints as his boyfriend _tried_ to quietly tiptoe around the room. 

“Where the fuck are you going? It’s Saturday … Sammy, s’cold… swear to God, get back in bed… why do you have to sound like an elephant trampling around, you giant?” All of which were muffled by Lucifer’s pillow. Sam chuckled at him, only succeeding in getting a pillow thrown at him. It missed him by a few feet but Sam got the point, slipping out of the room. 

He didn’t come trying to wake Lucifer up for another hour and, even though it was still too early for Saturday (by Luci’s standards), even he couldn’t be grumpy when he was drawn out of his slumber by a very wet heat surrounding his cock. He was sure it was just a dream at first - both had been interested in the idea the night before but by the time they finished all the accumulated paperwork from a week in court and then eaten dinner, both were too exhausted to even think about anything more than a goodnight kiss. 

So he tried to stay asleep as long as he could, trying to keep the sensation lingering, but his body was determined to pull him out of it. Finally realizing that his boyfriend was actually waking him for a delightful treat, he blinked his eyes open, pushing at a blanket in order to see Sam clearly. The young man glanced up at him with a self-satisfied smirk before swallowing his length down to the hilt. 

“Fu-fuck, Sam!” Lucifer whined, reaching down and grabbing a hefty fistful of Sam’s hair in his hand. Sam hummed, letting the vibrations of his throat stimulate Lucifer before pulling back a bit to allow himself to breathe. He used his hand for what his mouth didn’t cover and soon pulled back to just the head, dipping his tongue into the man’s slit before following the length of the vein on the underside of his cock with his tongue. The still-sleepy man was putty underneath his ministrations and Sam pushed Lucifer’s legs further apart in order to have better access to his balls. He sucked on one as he scratched his nails down Lucifer’s thigh with his one free hand, making the elder cry out with the overwhelming sensations. He switched, giving the other the same treatment before pressing kisses and little nipping bites to the pale expanse of Lucifer’s thighs. 

“Sam… Sammy, please.. D-don’t tease,” Luce cried out, thrusting his hips into Sam’s grip on him. Sam chuckled before taking his mouth back to Lucifer’s cock, happily working him towards his orgasm. Sam was working on the tip when Lucifer came without warning, splashing on Sam’s cheek and the corner of his mouth before he managed to wrap his mouth around him completely, swallowing it down. His mouth worked over him until he could hear Lucifer’s overstimulated whines and he lifted his head with a lewd pop before crawling back up to the top of the bed. Lucifer, eyes still dazed, swiped his finger across the cum on Sam’s face and before he could even speak, Sam had taken his finger into his mouth. Luce groaned, pulling his hand away. 

“S-stop it. M’too old for you to try to get me going again so fast,” he complained, causing Sam to laugh as he went to kiss him. 

“I like how you’re only old when your dick’s too sensitive to play,” he teased and Lucifer’s hand found the bulge in Sam’s boxers easily. 

“I can still play with you,” he pointed out when Sam gasped. “But what did I do to deserve a wake-up call like that?” 

“Oh, you’ve done plenty,” he started, his hips bucking into Lucifer’s hand. “But it was more of a bribe than a reward.” 

Lucifer’s eyes narrowed as he worked Sam’s boxers down to get his hands on him without the fabric in the way. 

“A bribe?” 

“Mhm… I’ve been chatting with Cas,” Sam started, his breathing becoming ragged. “And the four of us are going hiking today.” 

Lucifer’s hands disappeared and Sam whined loudly, bucking up into nothing. 

“Did you just say hiking?” 

“Can we argue about it after you get me off?” 

They both stared at each other in a silent face-off before Lucifer decided it was only fair. Sitting up, he pushed Sam back into the bed and straddled his hips. 

“You think that pretty little mouth can get me to do anything, huh?” He chided, sucking a mark on Sam’s neck and ignoring Sam’s cock rubbing against his bare ass. 

“Just wanted to-” 

Lucifer bit down on Sam’s neck, cutting off his excuses as Sam cried out. 

“I don’t know what’s worse, the fact that you want me to spend my Saturday hiking, or that you expect me to watch as Dean necks my baby brother,” he complained, sliding down in between Sam’s legs and kissing his thighs in an active act of ignoring his straining cock. “You think you can wake me with a blow and I’ll do whatever you say?” He added, shifting and holding Sam’s legs apart. “You aren’t in charge here, Sammy, dear,” he reminded, before swiping his tongue over Sam’s hole. The younger cried out as Luce continued to tease him again after that, not able to think of the hiking trip any longer. Lucifer’s hand came down on Sam’s thigh and he pulled back, ordering him onto all fours. 

Sam quickly scrambled into position on the bed, presenting his ass. Lucifer smacked each cheek before spreading them, licking a stripe over his hole before massaging his rim with his tongue. Sam’s back arched and his hand slipped down, gripping onto his cock until Lucifer slapped it away. 

“You come from my mouth or not at all,” Lucifer growled before diving back in between his cheeks. Sam whined beautifully but didn’t touch himself again. Luce finally pushed his tongue into him and went at it full force. He held Sam’s hip with one hand, hard enough to bruise, and scratched down Sam’s back with the other, leaving bright red marks. Sam had always been extremely vocal during sex and grew more and more desperate as he tried to reach his orgasm untouched. 

“C-can’t do it, Luce, p-please touch me,” he begged, just for Lucifer to get more enthusiastic, not answering him. “Need t’cum, Lu!” 

“Then show me what a good boy you are and cum for me, baby,” Lucifer said with a smirk, moving his head down lower to take Sam’s balls into his mouth. It helped send his poor Sam over the edge because he soon cried out, cumming onto his chest and the blankets below him. Lucifer was quick to catch him before he could fall into the puddle he had made, getting him to lay on his back a few inches away as he closed his eyes to catch his breath. 

Sam’s eyes popped back open when he felt Lucifer’s tongue on his stomach and he whined as he watched him lick up the splattered cum. 

“So good for me.. So beautiful,” Luce praised, moving up the bed to wrap his arms around his partner. Sam turned into him, burying his face in Lucifer’s chest for a few minutes as he came down from his high. When he finally did, he looked up into Lucifer’s blue eyes. 

“Does this mean you’ll go hiking?” 

“Not happily. But yes,” he murmured, pressing a kiss to Sam’s forehead before letting him go. “Now let’s go shower so we can get sweaty in a whole new, less fun way.” 

* * *

Hiking provided a chance for Lucifer and Dean to finally bond over something other than their annoyance about each other’s relationship. Granted, the new bonds were over their hatred for any physical activity that wasn’t sex _and_ their frustration with their partners bribing them into their day. Considering the first part of the trail was a brutal uphill climb, Sam and Castiel let them whine, sharing kisses and entertaining the complaints like champs. 

“It’s a walk in the park as soon as we reach the top,” Sam told Lucifer, handing him a bottle of water. 

“I won’t survive to the top!” Dean piped in, already too hot and sweaty. “You can leave me here to fucking die.” 

“You aren’t going to die, Dean. You’re fine,” Cas assured with a patience that was practically unheard of when it came to dealing with Dean. Sam couldn’t help but smirk as he walked ahead with Lucifer. 

\-- 

As promised, the trail did level out, but it was still too long for the less active two of the couples. Eventually, Sam and Cas tried to stay about ten feet ahead of them, a safe distance to not have to hear the complaints but to be available if they were actually needed - and since Cas had his and Dean’s food in his pack, he was “needed” quite often. They stopped to eat lunch before Dean could down all the snacks in his boredom before Sam and Cas took the lead once more. Eyeing the mile count shown on the bracelet on his wrist, Sam nudged Cas to look and they both grinned. 

“Come on, slowpokes!” Sam called out before they took off running ahead. 

“If you think we’re chasing you, you’re dumber than you look!” Dean yelled back, staying with Lucifer and taking their sweet time to catch up. By the time they cleared the trees, they stopped in their tracks, finding both men in their swimming trunks and standing on some rocks next to a small waterfall and a swimming hole with clear, clean water. 

“You look way too proud of yourselves,” Lucifer called out, getting knocked out of his trance first and beginning the climb down to where Sam and Cas were waiting. Sam handed him a bathing suit when he got close enough and led him off behind some rocks so he could change. Sam leaned against a rock, shamelessly watching the other undress. 

“Are you happy now?” 

“My feet feel like they’re about to fall off, Sam.” 

“It really wasn’t that long of a hike. The beginning was the worst part and you know it.” 

“Don’t care,” Luce muttered. By then, he was dressed once more and Sam placed his hands on the man’s hips, kissing him softly. “Still don’t care,” Lucifer muttered as soon as Sam pulled back, causing the taller man to laugh and lead him towards the water, where Cas had already waded in and was still waiting for Dean. 

“You get bit by a snake or something back there? C’mon!” Sam yelled in the direction where Cas said his brother was changing. There was a deathly silence for a beat before Dean yelled back. 

“Nobody fucking told me to watch out for snakes!” 

\-- 

The water was a bit chilly and despite Sam insisting that Lucifer would get used to it in a few minutes, the man clung to Sam for warmth, both arms and legs wrapped around him tightly as Sam waded a bit further out to have some privacy. He had been harassed enough for the fresh marks that littered his skin from his morning rendezvous and wanted a few moments alone with his partner. 

“I guess it is nice out here…” Lucifer admitted, lifting his head from where he had been resting it on Sam’s shoulder. 

“See? Isn’t this worth it?” Sam asked, gesturing to their surroundings. 

“No.” Lucifer’s answer was short, no amusement in his voice. Sam sighed, kissing his forehead. 

“I’m sorry, okay? I didn’t know it would make you this miserable. If you 100% didn’t want to come then why did you? I wouldn’t have dragged you out here kicking and screaming if you said no.” 

“I came because you wanted to and I love you, so I want to make you happy.” 

Sam didn’t answer right away, instead staring at Lucifer’s face, searching for any signs of deceit. When he didn’t find any, his brow furrowed. 

“You love me?” 

There was a moment of realization on Lucifer’s end, that he had just said it for the first time. He was typically cautious about it and despite finding himself almost saying the words multiple times recently, he had purposefully held back with the concern that Sam wasn't ready. But Sam hadn't let him go, hadn't started yelling, or done what he was actually scared of - run away. It signaled that this was going in the right direction, so Lucifer smiled and cupped Sam's cheeks in his hands. 

“Of course I love you, don’t be stupid,” he told him, causing Sam to throw his head back in laughter. 

“I love you too, Luce.” 

The rest of their time at the swimming hole consisted of a lot of laughter and a million games of chicken (both sets of brothers had to go against each other as well as each couple). And on the hike back, Lucifer stayed with Sam, hand-in-hand. He may have even been the one to tell Dean to stop complaining around mile three. 

\-- 

When they got back to Lucifer's place, Sam saw the multiple suit-bags hanging in the entryway but he didn’t think twice about it. Lucifer’s assistant, Lily, always hung Lucifer’s clothing up there after picking them up from the dry-cleaners. And since his partner walked straight past them on his frantic way to the bathroom (he had been needing to pee for almost an hour), Sam grabbed the bundle by their hangers, taking them to the bedroom. Perhaps it was his exhaustion after their long day, but it wasn’t until he was about to start hanging them up in Lucifer’s closet when he saw the note: 

_Mr. Alighieri - here is the first delivery for Samuel. The rest will be on the way shortly. ~ Balth x_

“ **Lucifer!** ”


	6. All That Glitters...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Again, not a lawyer.  
> Enjoy! xxx

Their last few days of the Johnson trial were more stressful than the beginning with the end lurking so near. Both teams, prosecution and defense, were pushing even harder, pulling out all of the stops. They stepped on toes with no apologies and left manners at the door. This? This was war. 

Lucifer finished his closing statement at 10:07am and, after Judge Miller detailed out the instructions to the jury, everyone flooded out. There was nothing left to do but wait. The two headed to a secluded hallway, bunkering down on a bench with the hopes that they had done their job well enough for this to be a quick decision. When the decision still hadn’t been made by the time their lunch break was over, they both got out their laptops, deciding to at least get some work done if they were going to be sitting around. After one false alarm of being called back into the courtroom just to listen as a specific transcript of an early day of court was read out to the jury, Sam was on edge. When five o’clock hit, meaning the jury was to be sequestered and deliberations would begin again the next morning, he began to freak out on his partner. 

“It happens sometimes, Sam, you can’t panic.” 

“I’m just ready for this to be over, Luce.” 

Lucifer merely took hold of Sam’s hand as they made their way through the courtroom and then the parking lot, remaining silent. 

“This is difficult enough but what happens when you absolutely know that they’re guilty as sin? I’d like actual insight from someone who deals with this constantly, not a professor who’s had little to no experience or who hasn’t dealt with it in a while,” Sam asked after they’d been back on the road for a few minutes. 

“Can I be honest?” Lucifer answered, briefly glancing over at the younger man. 

“Please do.” 

“Sam, you can lose your morality in this job pretty damn quick. You have to force yourself to think that your client is a perfect angel in order to keep your head here. You can’t think about right and wrong, your client is just… innocent,” Lucifer told him solemnly, finding the man’s hand once again and squeezing it tightly. “And if you absolutely can’t, then you focus on protecting their due process. You make that prosecutor work for it,” he added, pressing a kiss to the back of Sam’s hand. 

\-- 

Lucifer assured Sam that they could return to the office the next morning and they would be called over when the jury reached a decision, but Sam wasn’t having it. So, giving into the young lawyer, they both packed their laptops and some fresh casefiles, settling in at the courthouse for what was promising to be another long day. It was exactly 3:38pm when they were found by a courthouse assistant, informing them that a decision had been made and they were to make their way back to the courtroom. Lucifer got to his feet, packing his things away, and gave Sam a questioning look when he noticed that the man wasn’t moving. 

“What happens if they commit him, Luce?” 

“We move on.” 

“And just let them throw him in prison for life? What happens then? Do we work his appeals or-” 

“We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it,” Lucifer interrupted, kissing Sam’s forehead after making sure they were alone. “Let’s go.” 

\-- 

“Will the foreman of the jury please stand?” Judge Miller requested and a small man with wide-rimmed glasses got to his feet. “How has the jury found the defendant, Thomas Charles Johnson?” Judge Miller’s voice rang out loudly and Sam gripped Lucifer’s hand under the table. 

“The jury has unanimously determined that the defendant, Thomas Charles Johnson, is not guilty.” 

Sam let out a deep breath, weeks of anxiety washing away with a single exhale. He barely heard the dismissal of the court, distracted by his overjoyed daze. He followed Lucifer’s lead, shaking hands with the prosecution before heading out of the courthouse and to the car. 

“The great Lucifer Alighieri strikes again!” Sam teased as they pulled out of the parking lot. 

“Couldn’t have done it without you, Sammy.” 

“Like hell. This is one successful case out of your hundreds.” 

“And it’s your first. So let’s celebrate, yeah? You can call Castiel and Dean, see if they want to join us for a nice celebratory dinner.” 

\-- 

Dean was just as excited as, if not more than, Sam when he got the call. He knew how hard Sam had worked on this case and had listened to endless panicked rambles regarding the trial. If anything, he was just glad it was over in general and the win was just a bonus. 

“I’m walking into the hospital now to pick up Cas. I have no doubt that he’ll agree to dinner. Where did you say we were going?” 

“ _La Forêt_. Don’t know how he managed last minute reservations but I’m not going to question it. You need to dress nice.” 

“I’m going to need you to ask your sugar daddy why he feels like he is too good for McDonald’s.” 

“Shut up. It’ll be his treat - don’t you dare snack either, he’s excited over some seven course tasting menu or something, so you’ll need an empty stomach.” 

“Sounds good to me… Cas, what the he-heck are you doing?! Okay Sammy, I gotta go. This manchild in Curious George scrubs is about to get himself hurt. I’ll see you at eight.” 

The dial-tone was playing in Sam’s ear before he had a chance to respond and he chuckled, tossing his phone over onto the bed. It landed two inches beside a resting Lucifer who spared enough energy to open one eye to look at him. 

“ _Trying_ to hit me?” 

“What if I was?” 

“I’d have to kick your ass.” 

“You can kiss it instead,” Sam smirked, getting on the bed and hovering over his man. Lucifer lifted his head off of the pillows in order to connect their lips but he pulled away before it could get too heated. Tugging on Sam’s waist, he made the younger man lay on top of him instead of hovering. 

“Celebratory sex after dinner, yeah? Rest now, babe,” Lucifer urged, which must've been satisfactory for Sam, as he merely tucked his head into the crook of the man’s shoulder and closed his eyes. After all, it had been a long two weeks with very little sleep. 

* * *

Lucifer and Sam made it to the restaurant first, ten minutes early, but were still ushered right back to their table. Sam was looking around in awe, trying not to reek of new money and failing miserably. This was easily the nicest establishment he had ever been in and it was somewhat nerve-wracking. Lucifer’s thumb was drawing circles on the back of his hand, trying to calm him before pulling out Sam’s chair for him to sit. 

They hadn’t been waiting long when Dean and Castiel were shown to the table by the host. They were hand-in-hand but Dean’s face clearly showed some kind of agitation and Sam raised an eyebrow as they took their seats, Dean huffing. 

“Sam, Lucifer, congratulations on the win today,” Cas greeted with a smile, nodding at them. Sam thanked him before turning to his brother and lightly nudging his foot under the table. 

“What’s wrong with you?” 

“Ask Cas,” Dean responded, shooting daggers at the man in question. Castiel sighed and reached for Dean’s hand, intertwining their fingers. Dean allowed it, despite his attitude. 

“There were a handful of minor events that added up to upset him,” Cas started, which apparently was enough to get Dean to speak. 

“The night we met, the man tells me, ‘ _I’m a pediatric surgeon._ ’ Which is already intimidating enough, yeah? I show up at the hospital today to come get him and I’m trying to be a good boyfriend so I get there a bit early and go in to get him instead of staying in the car. I get up there, prevent him from breaking his damn neck to make a kid laugh, and he tells me he’ll be ready soon and I can go wait in his office. You know what’s written on his damn door? ‘Dr. Castiel Alighieri, Chief of Pediatric Surgery.’” 

Dean got on a roll after his first sentence and Lucifer looked bored while Sam was almost relieved that the problem wasn’t anything more than this nonsense. And Castiel, God bless him, was calm with a patient, understanding look on his face. 

“Dean believes that I misled him regarding my job.” 

“You don’t just operate on kids, you’re the _boss_ of the rest of people who operate on kids!” 

“Dean, it’s not-” 

“It is important, okay? It’s important to me,” Dean muttered and Sam sighed, leaning forward. 

“Dean, come on. You know I’ve always got your back, but I think you need to give Cas a break this time. I agree, there’s a difference between the jobs but there’s not _enough_ of a difference to start a fight over.” 

Dean was quiet after that, letting go of Cas’ hand in order to cross his arms in front of his chest. Tired of entertaining the pouty Winchester, Lucifer changed the subject as their first course was brought out along with a bottle of wine. The waitress poured everybody half a glass and took the bottle back with her. 

“It’s a tasting menu so the courses will be smaller than usual but there are seven of them including dessert, so I’m sure you’ll be stuffed by the time we’re done. I also went ahead and asked for the wine tasting too - they’ve paired each course with a different wine. That’s why it’s not a full glass - seven glasses of wine won’t let anyone drive home tonight,” he explained as their first dish was brought out. Sam wasn’t sure what it was, which means that he knew Dean didn’t have a damn clue, but the Alighieri brothers took it in stride. 

“Are you gonna tell us what it is?” Sam asked, looking down at the bowl of tiny dots in front of him. It almost looked like the quinoa that he typically had for lunch but he had a feeling that he was far off. 

“I will as soon as everybody has tried it,” he confirmed, taking a bite of his with a small smile. Dean and Sam tried it cautiously and Sam relaxed monumentally when he discovered that it tasted amazing. Dean had a bit of an odd look on his face but he didn’t dislike it enough to stop eating it. Before Lucifer could reveal the course, Dean spoke up again. 

“He made me change four times before we could leave,” the mechanic muttered, causing Lucifer to snicker and Sam to full-out laugh. 

“Do you see why now, Dean?” Cas asked him kindly, knowing that the approach of his dinnermates was only going to anger him more. “The first two outfits you chose wouldn’t have matched the dress code and you would have still been underdressed with the third.” 

“Says the man who spent the day in scrubs covered with a monkey and the man in the yellow hat!” Dean retorted, a small smile finding its way onto his face. “You’re a surgeon, you don’t even have to wear scrubs unless you’re operating.” 

“I work with kids, Dean. They respond better when you aren’t in stuffy clothes. Besides, everybody agrees that I have the best scrubs in the hospital,” Cas said with a smirk. 

“Yeah, yeah. They’re just saying that to make you feel better about your dorkiness,” Dean answered, as if he wasn’t constantly amused by his boyfriend’s attire. 

With Dean’s mood finally lifted, they could actually enjoy their dinner without the tension of an angry Winchester hovering over them. Granted, Dean’s trust was severed when the first dish was admitted to be caviar and Lucifer assured him he would like the next dish, since he ‘loved burgers.’ 

“What the hell is that?” Dean asked as a beef tartar was placed in front of him. “Is this.. Is this raw?” He added, poking at it with a fork and turning to Cas with wide eyes. 

“It’s beef tartar and yes, it’s raw. I will be opting out of this course and no one will blame you if you do too. No matter how beef is prepared, it can still make you very sick if it hasn’t been cooked to the proper temperature,” Cas explained, taking both his and Dean’s plates and placing them on the edge of the table so they could be picked up easily. 

Sam went to do the same but caught the almost disappointed look on Lucifer’s face and sighed. 

“One bite, okay?” He negotiated. What he put on his fork was hardly enough to be considered a bite but Lucifer didn’t fight him over it. Sam couldn’t get past the texture or the thoughts in his head that it was raw meat to focus on the taste and just grabbed his wine glass, downing the new flavor (which wasn’t even good either). 

The food got better from there and there wasn’t a single complaint for the rest of the meal, even from Dean, who didn’t care for seafood but still enjoyed the lobster tail. As their dessert was brought out, Lucifer held up his glass. 

“I would like to make a toast,” he announced to the table, looking over at Sam. Sam’s cheeks turned pink, even though Lucifer was plenty quiet enough for only their table to hear them. 

“I’d like to imagine that even if you hadn’t been working late on this case that we would still be where we are now, but I’m quite sure it was our delirium that allowed us to get past our reservations regarding each other. Thank you for standing with me for every step of the case and congratulations, as you were part of a huge step in today's victory. I am proud to be here for your very first win and am eager to celebrate each new one in the expanse of your career,” Lucifer said, making Sam’s eyes water and Dean grin like a maniac (Lucifer could be proud, sure, but nobody would ever be prouder of Sam than Dean Winchester). The lawyer turned to the other two at the table, gesturing for them to raise their glasses. 

“So here’s a toast to a hard worker, an incredible lawyer, the love of my life, and my last first kiss. Congratulations, Sam.” Lucifer clicked glasses with the other two at the table before leaning to kiss his partner. 

“I love you,” Sam whispered, pressing their foreheads together. “I think we make a damn good team.” 

“We do, don’t we?” Lucifer answered, giving him another kiss before sitting back up. “Now, everybody, dig in before we lose the motivation for any more food.” 

\-- 

They sat around the table, just talking for a bit as they let their food settle, before Lucifer made eye contact with their waiter for the check. It was immediately brought over and Lucifer didn’t even open the black booklet that hid the cost, he just tucked a shiny silver card inside and handed it back without pausing his conversation. When it was returned, he did open the booklet, tilting it away from Sam as he quickly signed the receipt. It wasn’t necessary, as Sam was deep in conversation with Castiel, but he wanted to be careful that Sam didn’t see the figure and begin to feel awkward. 

They stayed for a while longer and as they slowly made their way out of the restaurant, Sam began to notice how odd Dean was acting. He nudged his brother’s side, giving him a questioning look but Dean ignored him. 

“Dude, what’s wrong?” Sam asked quietly, pulling him to the side as they waited for the two cars to be brought back to the valet station. 

“Nothing, I just… Nothing.” Dean kept up the act for a few moments longer but couldn’t handle the heat of Sam’s bitchface. 

“I’m fine… Hey, how about you come home tonight, yeah? We can celebrate the Winchester way - some pie, a six-pack, and some Die Hard,” Dean suggested, cheering up a bit. The first emotion Sam felt was disappointment in not being able to enjoy a celebratory night with his boyfriend. Then a large wave of guilt hit - he had only been home a handful of times in the past two weeks and this was Dean. At the end of the day, Dean should and would always come first. So he nodded in agreement, feeling even more guilty for his thoughts when he saw the grin on his brother’s face. 

“Just let me tell Luce, okay?” Sam told him as a valet returned with the Impala and handed over her keys. Sam stepped over to where the Alighieri brothers were standing and Lucifer smiled, wrapping an arm around his waist. 

“You ready?” 

“Actually, I think I’m going to head home tonight. Spend some time with Dean, you know?” Sam immediately noticed the change in demeanor and he sighed, biting his lip. “Look, something’s wrong and he won’t tell me. So the least I can do is hang out with him for a night,” Sam added, his voice low so he couldn’t be overheard. Lucifer sighed, pressing a kiss to the corner of Sam’s mouth. 

“I guess I have been monopolizing your time lately..” he relented. “Fine. I guess we can have celebratory sex tomorrow night.” His comment made a worried Sam laugh and he grinned, giving him a squeeze. “ 

“I love you, Luce. I’ll see you in the morning, I promise,” Sam whispered, squeezing his hands. Lucifer walked him over to the Impala, where Cas was already sitting shotgun since Dean had to drop him off first. 

“Goodnight, Castiel. Thank you for joining us,” Lucifer said through the open window, clapping a hand on his shoulder as Sam slid into the backseat. 

“Make sure you girls get some sleep tonight - no staying up all night gossiping. Sammy still has work tomorrow,” Lucifer directed towards Dean with a smirk. Sam flipped him off and he just grinned before patting the roof of the car. 

“Goodnight, everyone.” 

* * *

Dean was three beers (and three and a half glasses of wine) in when he finally began to spill about what was actually bothering him. 

“They’re not like us, Sammy.” 

“Huh?” Sam looked away from the television, distracted as they had stopped talking maybe twenty minutes ago and he had been drifting off. 

“They’re not like us! Two different worlds, Sammy, and we’ll only be upset when it comes crashing down.” 

“Dean, what are you talking about?” Sam took the beer bottle out of Dean’s hand and moved it out of his reach, sighing. 

“Your boytoy spent two thousand dollars tonight. Did you know that?” 

“What are you-” 

“I saw the damn check. Dinner was over thirteen hundred and then he left a fifty percent tip. And he didn’t even fucking blink. Did you see that card he handed over?” 

“No, I wasn’t paying attention when he was paying. That’s rude and-” 

“Don’t give me that bullshit. It was one of those J.P. Morgan cards.” 

“Is that supposed to mean something to me?” 

“You gotta have ten million in assets with the bank before they even _invite_ you to get that card,” Dean snipped back and Sam grew still. “And you know a man with that kind of money has it in more than just one place. He isn’t stupid.” 

“Dean, the amount of money in his bank account doesn’t-” 

“And Cas has money too. He may not flaunt it as much as Lucifer does but it’s there. I might be dumb but I’m not blind.” 

“You’re not… Look. They come from money. And that’s not to say that they haven’t worked hard to be where they are because they both have. But they did have an extra helping hand,” Sam tried, although there was a sinking feeling in his own stomach now. It was just a topic that he avoided, verbally and mentally, and he had gotten pretty good at ignoring it. 

“Do you know what we’d have done tonight if you weren’t fucking him?” Dean demanded and Sam shot him a glare until he corrected himself. “ _Dating_ him, whatever. Not the time for details right now. I would’ve taken you out to dinner to celebrate your first big win. And because the monthly bills regarding your student loans have _mysteriously disappeared_ and I just got paid, I probably would’ve taken you to get a steak. And then we’d have come home to do exactly this - a six pack and a movie.” 

“If you wanted to do something with just us then you could have-” 

“No, because your fancy boyfriend had already pulled strings and gotten us same-day reservations in a restaurant that is usually booked for months, before I even got the call.” 

“Dean, I’m really sorry if-” 

“Stop it!” Dean’s voice was harsher than it had been before as he cut Sam off once more. “I’m trying to tell you, as your big brother, that it is not going to work for either of us. We are from different worlds, Sam. You can pretend all you want but it’s not going to work.” Dean leaned forward, grabbing his beer back. “Cas is going to learn the truth about my dirty past and he’s going to run far away. And you think Lucifer is really going to be happy with someone who lived on the streets instead of going to bed at a fancy boarding school every night?” 

Sam’s entire body became stiff as a board as he began to shut down. He gulped harshly and shook his head slowly. 

“He’s not.. He’s not like that. He doesn’t care. And neither does Castiel. He won’t care when you tell him because that was in the past and he’s not an asshole. Don’t push your insecurities about your relationship onto me and mine.” 

“I did _whatever_ it took so we could survive, Sammy,” Dean hissed back, a haunted look in his eyes. “And Cas is too good for someone like that.” 

“Look, I am sorry about everything that you went through for me. I really am. But you don’t have to keep throwing it in my face. I didn’t know what you were out there doing. But I’ll tell you one thing, Castiel Alighieri is not too good for a man who sacrifices everything he is for the sake of his little brother. Now go to your room so I can go to bed.” Sam’s tone was brutal and between that and the look he gave Dean, it must’ve been enough to get him to realize how serious he was. Dean reluctantly got to his feet and went into the bedroom, slamming the door behind him. 

Sam yanked the pull-out couch into place and laid down, checking his phone one last time before putting it on charge. He noticed a text from ‘My Man’ and briefly wondered when Lucifer had changed his contact name - they were often changing it back and forth and he was certain that the last time he had texted him, his name was ‘The Asshole.’ Lovingly, of course. 

**[From: My Man]**

**Just wanted to tell you goodnight, baby. I hope you and Dean got some much needed brother time in - I’m sorry that I’ve taken you away from him so much recently. Now that the case is over hopefully you’ll have more time together. I love you, sweet dreams. LA**

Sam stared at the words on his screen for a while before dismissing the notification.


	7. We Need To Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our boys really needed to have some serious conversations, huh?
> 
> Warning for a very brief mention of underage prostitution. I promise that there are no details but I just want to be overly cautious for safety reasons, yeah?  
> ALSO sad talk of homeless Winchesters - not sure if that warning is necessary but I'd like to cover all of my bases, just in case. Gotta take care of my loves. 
> 
> Enjoy!! xxx

Sam managed maybe about two hours total of sleep before his alarm was going off on his phone. He got up quickly and immediately regretted it when the muscles in his back began to scream at him. His body didn't appreciate the brutal treatment; the sofa-bed didn't hold a candle to the California king bed at Lucifer's. As a remedy, he quickly pulled on some workout gear and went for an early run before taking a shower and heading off to the firm, all before Dean ever woke up. 

He had been sitting at his desk, staring blankly at a file for about twenty minutes when his phone vibrated twice. 

_[From: My Man]_

_Good morning handsome. Are you in yet? LA_

_I brought you breakfast. Come up and eat with me before we start the day. LA_

**I’ve actually already started. Don’t have time. Sorry. SW**

Deciding that if he was going to tell that story then it might as well be true, he unlocked his computer and opened up the file in front of him, immersing himself in it. It didn’t last for too long until there was a swift knock on the door to the intern office and the door opened, revealing a pissy looking Meg, holding a lunchbox and a silver travel mug that he recognized clearly. Not only had Lucifer brought him breakfast, he had _made_ him breakfast at home. Her glare immediately set on Sam and he shifted uncomfortably as she marched over to his desk and slammed the items down onto it. 

“Do you want to explain to me why I’m being sent to bring your breakfast to you, pretty boy?” She demanded, crossing her arms over her chest. 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t tell him to. Thank you, though,” he said with a sigh, rubbing the back of his neck. 

“I’m his secretary, not your personal assistant. Let’s not make this a habit,” she answered dryly, turning away from him and pointing at Kevin Tran, another intern. “You. Upstairs. Bossman needs to see you.” 

“Oh, okay... What for?” His brown eyes widened in an innocent fear. He hadn't been singled out by the boss since his internship started and he had found that flying under the radar seemed to work to his advantage. 

“Above my paygrade, kid. Just get upstairs, he’s already in a pissy mood.” 

\--

The next time the door to the office opened, a red-faced Kevin stomped through carrying a cardboard box while Lucifer himself leaned in the doorway, flanked by a security guard on both sides. 

“You’ll regret this,” Kevin hissed as he began to throw his belongings into the box. 

“Save it. The only one here who is allowed to be that dramatic is me. Be glad that I’m not going to the authorities with this and shut up,” Lucifer responded from the doorway. A few tense minutes followed with nobody working and all of the interns blatantly staring as Kevin packed his desk up before being escorted out by the security guards. Instead of joining them, Lucifer came into the room and sat down on top of the newly empty desk, looking over Sam and the other three interns still in the room. 

“Listen up! We’ve been searching for the culprit of a little security breach here in the office. Low and behold, the rat was one of the interns that my staff and I laboriously decided over. You may have heard me when I said that I’m not reporting him to the authorities. Do not mistake this as a weakness as he will punished enough. By the time I’m done with him, he will have to start over in school for a new degree. There's not a single law firm that would hire him even if his pretty little university decided to grant him his degree after this little stunt,” Lucifer explained, his voice surprisingly chipper for the topic of discussion. “So why don’t you all let this serve as a lesson, yes? Now, get back to work and make me proud,” he finished before marching out of the room. The other three immediately looked to Sam who threw his hands up. 

"Look, he doesn't tell me everything that goes on here. I didn't have a damn clue that there was a security breach, much less that _that_ was going to happen. Just... he's so angry that he's _cheerful_. I'd listen to what he says and fucking get back to work." 

\-- 

By six that evening, Sam was the only one left in their office. At that point, he had avoided a few more messages from Lucifer and only succeeding in making himself feel worse each time that he did. He barely spared a glance when Lucifer walked in with his bag and keys in hand and he heard a sigh come from the older man. 

“Are you ready to go?” 

“I’m going to stay and get some more work done on my dissertation. You can head on out,” Sam answered, fingers tapping on his keyboard. He didn’t look away from the screen until it was pushed down on top of his hands and he shot a glare at his partner. “What are you doing?” 

“I’m forcing my boyfriend to give me the time of day, apparently!” Lucifer huffed back, setting his things down. “Can you please tell me what’s wrong? We had what I _thought_ was a lovely night last night and ever since you left with Dean, you’ve been ignoring me.” 

“I’m not ignoring you.” 

“Bullshit. Now tell me what’s going on.” 

“Nothing. I’m just busy… Just go home, Lucifer,” Sam muttered and Lucifer glared at him before perching himself up on the end of his desk. 

“Nope,” Lucifer responded, popping the ‘p’. He watched as Sam got to his feet, placing his laptop into his bag. 

“Fine. I’ll go to the damn library then.” 

“Samuel Winchester, I swear to God, neither of us are leaving this room until you tell me what your problem is. What did I do to piss you off?” He demanded and Sam stared at a spot on the desk, staying quiet before sitting back down in his chair. Lucifer stopped questioning, hoping that he could wait out the silence if he was patient enough. He was right, as Sam spoke up a couple minutes later. 

“You didn’t do anything.” 

“Sam, something is-” 

“You didn’t do anything. I just got a pretty harsh slap in the face last night and I’m trying to figure out how to deal with it,” Sam explained, finally looking at Lucifer’s face. 

“Let me help you, Sammy. We can work through it together.” 

At Lucifer’s words, Sam went quiet again and Lucifer didn’t push as he saw the gears turning in Sam’s head as he tried to figure out the right words to say. 

“Did you really spend $2,000 at dinner last night?” Sam finally asked and Lucifer had the audacity to look relieved. 

“Is that what has you upset? Sam, it was really no big deal. I was treating you and Cas and Dean to a nice meal to celebrate. It didn’t damage my wallet, I promise.” 

“ _That’s_ the problem.” 

Lucifer looked at his partner and furrowed his eyebrows, slightly confused. 

“What do you mean?” Lucifer asked, taking Sam’s hand as the intern grew quiet once more. He was silent for so long that Lucifer was starting to give up hope of the conversation continuing before he finally said three words: 

“I was homeless.” 

Lucifer took a deep breath and nodded slowly, realizing that Sam wasn’t ready for him to speak yet. 

“I lived on the streets when I was eight, Dean was twelve… We were out there for two years. And even though we were together, my experience was a lot different than Dean’s was. I had him to take care of me but he didn’t have anyone. He stole what he could for a while. After a close call with a shopkeeper, he realized he needed to find a way to make money. He uh, got in with a drug dealer, started selling for him. That ended badly too. And then…” Sam trailed off, his lower lip quivering as he stared at the wall. It wasn’t his story to tell, it wasn’t his story to tell… 

* * *

_Sam was sitting against a brick wall, a garbage bin a couple feet in front of him. The lid was open and propped against the wall, making a makeshift roof that Dean had attached a tarp to, shielding him inside for an illusion of safety. Sam had his flashlight in one hand, shining it on a ratty journal in his lap as he drew pictures. He jumped when the tarp shifted on one side and he turned his flashlight in that direction, effectively blinding his big brother._

_“Sammy, stop that,” he huffed, blocking his eyes as he fixed the tarp back and sat down beside Sam with a wince. Sam’s eyebrows furrowed together and he used the flashlight to see a bruise on Dean’s cheek._

_“Why are you hurt?”_

_“I’m perfectly fine,” Dean assured him, taking off his backpack and placing it in his lap so he could unzip it. He pulled out a cellophane packet, smiling at his baby brother. “Look what I got.”_

_It was a premade sandwich from a gas station with a bright orange sticker that advertised a discount considering it should’ve been sold the day before. It wasn’t much - two slices of ham, a single slice of cheese, and a very wilted piece of lettuce between two pieces of bread - but Sam’s mouth began to water at the sight of it. Dean smiled and ruffled Sam’s hair, taking it out of the plastic and ripping it into four parts. He placed one on his knee and then the other three on the plastic in front of Sam._

_“Eat up,” Dean urged and Sam picked up one of the pieces and practically inhaled it as if it were the best thing on earth. After the horrific ache in his stomach had been dulled slightly, he could better focus on the incorrect way that Dean had split the sandwich. He frowned and picked up one of his pieces and held it out to Dean, who was nibbling slowly at the square in his hand._

_“No, it’s okay, Sammy. I’m not that hungry, you can have it,” Dean assured him with a smile._

_“But half should be yours. You can save it for yourself for later.”_

_“Nah, it won’t be as good then. Go ahead.”_

_Sam was reluctant but Dean assured him a few more times that he was fine and got him to eat all three pieces._

_Later that night, when Sam was using Dean as a pillow, he pretended not to hear the desperate grumbles of Dean's stomach begging for food under his ear as he drifted off to sleep._

* * *

“He started selling himself,” Sam whispered before the tears started. He had never once told anybody that and it was like a dam broke when he said it. “He got the money that he used to feed me from nasty sickos who wanted to have sex with a twelve year old boy.” 

His heart breaking, Lucifer got down from the desk and leaned on the arm of Sam’s chair so he could wrap his arms around the crying man. He could easily see that Sam blamed himself for everything that Dean had done to keep them alive and after so many years of harboring that, he knew that simply promising Sam that it wasn’t his fault wasn’t going to work. So he just held him as Sam cried against his chest. 

After a long time, Sam finally lifted his head and Lucifer was quick to wipe his cheeks and press a kiss to his forehead. 

“I got pneumonia that second winter and Dean had to take me in to the emergency room. He said they told him I was on death’s doorstep when I got there. A deathly ill nine year old and a thirteen year old by themselves obviously raised a lot of questions and we went straight into the system. There were a few shitty foster homes; once, they tried placing us with two separate families. Dean kept running away from his in order to get back to me. They’d take him back and he’d just run again. They learned their lesson though and we got put in group homes after that. A lot of kids thought it was hell but it felt like paradise to me. We _both_ **always** had food and I was so excited to be able to go back to school… It was two years of that before Bobby and Ellen adopted us,” Sam explained while Lucifer just stroked his hair. They sat that way for a while with Luce desperately trying to comfort his lover. 

"And last night, Dean just reminded me that we are from two different worlds. And there is no place for someone like a Winchester in an Alighieri’s life.” 

After everything that Sam had told him, it was that statement that had tears sliding down Lucifer’s cheeks. His Sam, his precious Sam, didn’t think that he deserved to be with him. Lucifer squeezed Sam to his chest tightly, shaking his head and pressing kisses into Sam’s hair. 

“Sam, baby, no. Don’t you say things like that. Please don’t.. I don’t ever want to hear anything like that come out of your mouth again, baby,” he murmured before pulling back and holding Sam’s face to force him to make eye contact. “Sam Winchester, I love you more than you will ever understand. And knowing this about your past doesn’t change that. If anything, it makes me love you even more, knowing how strong you are... Sammy, you are not that eight year old on the street anymore, do you hear me? Look where you’ve ended up, baby. You have a mother and father and a sister who adore you and a brother who would lay down his life for you. You went to Stanford, you’ll be graduating at the top of your class come this May, and you will have your pick at any law firm in the state,” Lucifer paused before leaning in and kissing Sam’s forehead. “And you have a boyfriend who loves you so goddamn much and wants nothing more in this world than for you to be happy and healthy.” 

Sam couldn’t hold the eye contact any longer and he buried his face into the crook of Lucifer’s neck, sniffling. The elder man held him tightly, running a hand through his long hair and humming to him as he cried. When Sammy had grown still and quiet for more than a minute or two, Lucifer spoke up again. 

“Why don’t you come home with me? You need dinner and some pajamas and we’ll talk about anything you need to discuss,” he murmured, getting Sam to lift his head and nod. 

“I think that would be good,” Sam whispered in response, letting go of his boyfriend to shakily begin packing his things back up. Before they left the office for the night, he typed out a text: 

**[To: Castiel]**

**Heads up. Don’t let him leave - he doesn’t actually want to. MAKE him talk. SW**

\-- 

"I like pizza and cooking at home just as much as you do, baby. I just also have an appreciation for fine dining,” Lucifer explained. He had convinced Sam that a bath was what he really needed to relax, so he was sitting with his back to the tub wall with Sam between his legs and pressing his back to Lucifer’s chest. “I truly was unaware that this was still a big issue for you. I just wish you would’ve said something to me earlier so that we could’ve been working on it.” 

“It wasn’t! Well, it was. But I had gotten to the point where I could look past all that. Dean just really got to me, I guess.” 

“You guess?” 

“Shuddup…” 

“But besides that, a fourth of what I spent last night was in tips. If I can afford to make someone’s life just a little easier then why shouldn’t I?” Lucifer reminded him, knowing that kind of logic was something Sam could definitely get on board with. 

“Speaking of… Dean said that the bills for my student loans have ‘mysteriously disappeared.’ Do you know what that’s about?” 

Lucifer’s right hand had been absentmindedly stroking Sam’s thigh and it stopped for a moment, obviously having been caught off guard by the question. 

“I can explain.” 

“Please do.” 

“You mentioned them a few times and I may have taken the liberty to look into it. I didn’t pay it off completely, I wanted to discuss it with you first. I just… payments were behind and I wanted them to stop bothering you. So I got you caught up and then had the statements redirected to me instead.” 

“Lucifer, you can’t just do shit like that. I want this relationship to be about the way we feel for each other, not about money.” 

“Sammy, it really isn’t-” Lucifer started, stopping himself before he could say ‘ _that much money_.’ Because to the man in his arms, that money was everything. That number had probably been looming over Sam’s head since he was in high school filling out college applications. It wasn’t fair for him to say something like that to Sam. “Sam, I am sorry that I didn’t talk to you about it first. I just wanted to make things a little easier for you and Dean. You have other things to worry about right now and so does your brother. I knew I could help and I… well, I wanted to.” 

“I’m not used to shit like this and it makes my heart race when you do it. Like, I have never once seen you check your bank account unless you were doing bills. When we go out to the store, you don’t even look at price tags. We’ll go get groceries and while I’m comparing prices, you just grab the first thing you see and toss it into the shopping cart.” 

“That’s not fair - that’s food! I shouldn’t have to add an extra half hour to my shopping trip dealing with prices if I don’t have to. I try to tell you that and you never-” 

“Because it’s not. my. money, Lucifer.” Sam’s words were sharp. They weren’t aggressive, per say, but they still stung. He opened his mouth to speak but closed it when nothing came out. It took a minute or two for him to form a response. 

“I don’t know how to convince you that I firmly believe that what’s mine is yours, Sam. I would honestly feel so much better if you would take one of my cards, so that I know that you are being taken care of when I’m not around. But I know that’s a fight for another time. I just… I will try to be more conscientious of spending habits. And I will do my best to understand things from your perspective,” he finished, chewing on his lower lip. Sam gave him a smile though and nodded, kissing Lucifer’s jawline. 

“And I will do my best to understand from your perspective. I appreciate you trying to take care of me, Luce, I really do. But it’s hard. And I know that probably sounds silly to you, that I can’t get used to the idea of someone spending money on me, but it’s just… it’s a real concern on my end,” Sam explained, carefully turning in the tub so the water wouldn’t splash and pressing their foreheads together. 

“We’ll both work hard to understand and let each other know when we’re bothered by something money-related, no matter how awkward it might seem,” Lucifer whispered and Sam nodded, his eyes darting down to briefly glance at Lucifer’s lips as his tongue swiped across his lower lip. Lucifer smirked, making eye contact once more. 

“Seal it with a kiss?” 

* * *

* * *

Dean had continued drinking after leaving Sam alone to go to bed. There was a bottle of whiskey in his room that needed a little love, after all. And because he had the courage to talk, he got his phone out and began to text. 

**[To: Dr. Honeybee]**

**know what? fuck you DW**

**think you can come into my life with those eyes and ill do whatever the fuck you want DW**

**we both know youre gonna leave just do it already DW**

_Drink some water and go to bed, love. You have to work tomorrow. CA_

**stop acting like you fuckin care DW**

**nobody goddamn cares about a whore DW**

**go fuck a fancy doctor and leave me alone DW**

_Dean, let’s talk when you’re sober. I love you. Goodnight. CA_

**i hate you DW**

\-- 

Dean’s texts were brutal. Castiel tried to pretend like they weren’t, like he understood that it was just drunk rambling and maybe Dean was just an aggressive drunk. He wouldn’t know, as Dean had never gotten _this_ drunk around him before. But he couldn’t afford to stay up and dwell - he had a surgery scheduled in the morning. 

When the sun and a very reluctant Castiel rose the next morning, he refrained from sending Dean a good morning text like usual. There was no use in poking the bear, not yet. He wasn’t in the right mindset for that. 

He wanted to get over to the garage after his morning surgery but his workload just didn’t allow it. Additionally, as he was preparing to gather his things and go home for the day, he was needed for an emergency surgery that had him scrubbing in and operating for the next few hours. When he was finally actually leaving, he saw a text from the younger Winchester on his phone. It gave him the courage he needed to go through with his plan to go and see Dean and, knowing that the man was already at home by this time, he made two stops before he was pulling into the apartment complex and knocking on the door. 

Dean answered, dressed in only a pair of sweatpants and his hair was still wet from the shower. It wasn’t _even_ fair - Castiel should not have to face the man trying to dump him when he looked like _that_. 

“What do you want?” Dean demanded, refusing to make eye contact. 

“I have burgers and pie. I’m here to talk.” 

“I said what I needed to say.” 

“You were drunk.” 

“Point still stands,” Dean muttered, staring at the ground. 

“No, it fucking doesn’t,” Castiel answered, his voice hostile enough for Dean to look up at his face. “If you’re breaking up with me, then you can be a man and say it to my face with an explanation.” 

Dean didn’t verbally respond but after a minute, he stepped back to let Castiel into the apartment. The surgeon unpacked the food from greasy paper bags, setting up two spots at the bar in the kitchen and sitting down. 

“Do you want to tell me what brought on last night’s messages?” Cas asked as Dean sat down, picking up a burger. There was no response as Dean took his first bite and even then, stayed quiet after. 

He was harder to break than Sam had been. Cas had fed him dinner, dessert, and settled him in on the couch with a beer before Dean ever opened his mouth. 

“You’re going to leave me anyways. I’m just getting there before you do.” 

“And what makes you think that I’m planning to leave you?” 

“I ain’t right for you, Cas.” 

“I think we fit pretty well together.” 

“We don’t. We’re at two ends of a spectrum. Guys like you.. You’re at the top of the world. You can have whatever you want. And I’m at the bottom of the pit, the lowest of the low, and we were never meant to mix.” 

“I have never understood why you insist on placing me on some pedestal above you like you’re not worth anyone’s time of day.” 

“I’m not.” 

“Dean-” 

“I’m not! You have your world and I have mine and I was stupid to think they could mix.” 

“I agree that we are nothing alike. I had a cushy life in Silicon Valley and you were adopted in Kansas. But there is no reason that those two can’t mix. I want them to mix.” 

“They won’t. They’ll just collide and break and we’ll both be fucking miserable.” 

“I don’t know about you, but hearing you say stuff like this is already making me pretty miserable,” Cas retorted, which got Dean to look up at him sadly. Dean lifted his beer, taking another long pull from the bottle before scratching at the label. 

“You don’t know the kind of shit I’ve done, Cas.” 

“I don’t care what you’ve done.” 

“You should.” 

“I care about your past only with the idea that it made you the man that I have fallen for. The details don’t matter to me, Dean.” 

“I was a whore.” 

“I don’t care.” 

“‘Course you do. Everybody cares about shit like that.” 

“You’re clean and you’re in a monogamous relationship with me. So no, I do not care about what you used to be. I am in no position to judge anyone for their life decisions, Dean.” 

“It wasn’t a willing decision. It was a _desperate_ one,” Dean whispered, staring at the wall. Castiel began to get an extremely vague idea of what Dean was trying to say and he scooted closer, taking his hand. 

“Talk to me. Talk to me, let it out, and let’s bury it behind us together. Please, Dean.” 

\-- 

Dean talked. He told him dirty details that he didn’t want to hear himself say and Cas didn’t want to listen to. He told Castiel things that he had never even told Sam. They both sobbed as they clung to each other and held on tight, neither having been exactly ready for the emotional overload. 

And at a quarter past two am, when Dean was finally asleep beside him in bed, Castiel picked up his phone to send a quick text message. 

**[To: Sam Winchester] Thank you. CA**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feedback is always awesome? Thank you for reading!


	8. I Didn't Do It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm aware that this is a bit shorter than previous chapters. Mood wise, it just fit better to be put alone. The next chapter will be uploaded soon.   
> Also, a lot of dialogue in this one. I'm still having a hard time with format - leaving it the way I was doing it made it seem really choppy. Please tell me if I need to try something else for the formatting because I really want it to be readable. 
> 
> Warning for sexual harassment allegations, no actual sexual harassment. 
> 
> Enjoy! xxx

_A week later_

Sam reached the top of the stairs, letting himself onto Lucifer’s floor and heading towards Meg’s desk with a plastic bag in hand. She looked at the bag and gave him a fake frown. 

“None for me, Sammy?” 

“Sam. And not this time. Is that client gone?” 

“You’re safe to go see your boyfriend. I’ll make sure he’s left alone,” she replied with a wiggle of her eyebrows. 

Sam wanted to say something about how they’d just be having lunch and that wouldn’t be necessary, but he figured it was more effort than it was worth. When he pushed open Lucifer’s door, the man was massaging his temples but flashed a smile at Sam’s arrival. 

“There’s my Sammy,” he crooned as Sam leaned over to give him a kiss before sitting down on the edge of the desk. 

“I brought some lunch, figured I’d sneak away and eat with you for a bit,” he explained, taking out the two large salads from the bag he had carried in and handing one off to his partner. “Grilled chicken and…” he dug back into the bag before holding out a packet of dressing. “Ranch dressing,” he announced, which Lucifer took from him happily. He sat down on the desk where Lucifer’s computer had been sitting, his legs framing Lucifer’s chair. Taking the lid off of his own lunch, he poured out half of his packet of Italian dressing before they settled into a comfortable silence for the first part of their meal. 

“I don’t think I had realized how hungry I was,” Lucifer said as the bottom of his bowl was becoming visible. 

“You didn’t have breakfast this morning.” 

“I was in a rush.” 

“I offered to pack you something!” 

“Didn’t want it.” 

“Which is why I brought you lunch - to make sure you ate.” 

Lucifer rolled his eyes at him, causing Sam to grin and lean over carefully to kiss him, not wanting to fall off of the desk. This was the same time that Meg decided to beep in to Lucifer’s office phone. Sam groaned, pressing the button for him. 

“Meg, you said you’d-” 

“Shut up, Moose. Luci, I have fielded off three different reporters in the past fifteen minutes. Do you want to explain to me what you did?” Meg demanded. Lucifer’s eyebrows furrowed as he glanced at Sam before shaking his head. 

“I don’t know what it could be about.” 

“Look, I don’t care. But I can’t very well help you if I don’t know what’s- Gabriel, you can’t go in right now, he’s having his lunch,” Meg interrupted her statement to her boss to block Mr. Novak’s entrance into the office hidden behind her desk. 

“Does it look like I care? Move!” Gabriel’s voice came through, more serious than he usually was on a daily basis before the line cut and the door flung open. Sam and Lucifer both got to their feet, thoroughly shocked. 

“Gabriel, do you care to explain what is going on?” 

“It’s all over the TV. You’ve made the damn headlines this time.” 

“With **what**?!” Lucifer was exasperated, never one to appreciate being left out of the loop. Sam placed his hand on Lucifer’s lower back, trying to soothe him at least a little. 

“The intern you fired? The real young one, the Tran kid? He went to the news about sexual harassment allegations.” 

The room grew silent for a beat before Lucifer immediately turned to Sam. 

“I swear to you, I never laid a hand on him,” he said, his eyes revealing the wave of emotions that he felt in that moment. Sam could see the fear and the panic and he straightened his back, pressing a kiss to the top of Lucifer’s head. 

“I know, Luce. I don’t-” 

“As sweet as this is, I’m not done. He’s not claiming you harassed him. He’s gotten his hands on security footage and gave a news outlet a photo of you pressing Winchester here against the wall in the elevator and kissing him. He’s speaking on Sam’s behalf to say that you’re sexually harassing _him_ ,” Gabriel interrupted, making it Sam’s turn to freeze and go pale. 

“W-what? I didn’t! I swear, I never-” Sam immediately started stuttering. 

“Oh come on, I think we’re well aware that you didn’t recruit him to throw Lucifer’s career down the toilet,” Meg said from the doorway, having been listening in the whole time. Lucifer nodded in agreement, squeezing Sam’s hands. 

“I’ll make a statement. It’ll be easy clean-up,” Luce assured. Gabriel shook his head and pointed a finger at Sam. 

“No. He has to do it - nobody will believe it if it comes from you. The kid has to be the one to go public with it," Gabriel explained as Sam’s eyes grew wide and he pointed at himself. 

“Me? A public statement? You mean a camera and the TV and everything?” 

“If you really care about the bossman, then yes, Sam. You have to do it,” Gabriel said, a little kinder than he had been previously. Sam looked to Lucifer, who squeezed his hands tightly. 

“We’ve got this. We’ll do it together. I’ll be right by your side the whole time, I promise,” he assured before reaching for his cell phone as it began to ring. “It’s Castiel. Let me take this and we’ll start doing damage control. Gabriel, Meg, thank you. I’ll take over from here.” 

The two were reluctant to leave but followed orders anyway as Lucifer lowered Sam into his chair before answering his phone. 

  


“Hello?”  
“Lucifer, I’ve just heard the news. Are you okay?”  
“Yes, we’ve only just found out ourselves. I’ve yet to see it but we have been alerted.”  
“You don’t want to see it. They’re having a field day with this. How is Sam?”  
“A little shaken, but-”  


  


Sam stopped listening as his phone started to ring. Seeing it was Dean, he got to his feet and stepped towards the window before answering the call. 

  


“Hey Dean,” he answered dejectedly.  
“Whose ass do I gotta kick?”  
“Dean! You know it’s not true! I love him, he’s not-”  
“Sammy, stop. Breathe. Look, someone is trying to ruin my baby brother’s first meaningful relationship so somebody’s ass is getting kicked. So point me in the right direction.”  


  


Sam cracked his first smile in the past ten minutes and went to answer before his phone beeped in his ear. He frowned, pulling it away to look at the screen before his eyes widened. 

  


“Dean, here’s the thing. You can’t help with that. But, I need your help with damage control - Mom’s calling. I’ll talk to her but I’m going to need you to confirm my story.”  
“You haven’t told her about Lucifer?!”  
“Um, well, no. No, I haven’t. Look, I gotta answer before it sends her to voicemail. Thanks, man,” he said quickly before clicking the button on his screen to switch the call.  


  


“Momma? Hey,” he answered, trying to seem casual. Lucifer was off the phone with Castiel at this point and looked up from his phone at Sam’s mention of his mother.  
“Samuel Winchester, don’t you ‘hey’ me. I am getting on the next flight to California, do you hear me? You’ll have to come visit me in prison when I’m done with that man,” Ellen’s voice came through strong, causing both Sam and Lucifer to flinch.  
“Look, please don’t. It’s not necessary, it’s just a big misunderstanding!”  
“I saw that picture, Sam. You don’t have to protect him any longer. The truth is out and you are safe now,” she said as Sam pulled at his hair, fidgeting.  
“He’s my boyfriend.” Sam had meant to say it louder, more confident and hard-hitting to pack a punch. But it just came out quiet and defeated, unsure of exactly how they had landed in this situation. Lucifer came to the rescue, taking the phone from Sam and placing it on speaker before wrapping an arm around the taller man.  


“Mrs. Win-” Lucifer started, cutting himself off when he remembered that Sam was adopted. He quickly turned to Sam, who whispered ‘Harvelle’ to him before continuing. “Mrs. Harvelle, this is Lucifer Alighieri, Sam's boss, boyfriend, and the man from the photograph. I know that it’s hard to see something so personal to your son on the television, especially when you realize you don’t know the truth about it. But the allegations are nothing more than just that - allegations. Sam and I are romantically involved and this entire situation is the result of a disgruntled employee who was recently terminated,” Lucifer had taken over the sweet-talking of Ellen, holding Sam tight the entire time he spoke. 

“Boyfriend?” Ellen asked after a beat of silence, taking a deep breath. 

“Yes, Ma. He’s my boyfriend, my partner. Dean’s met him and everything. You can ask him to be sure that I’m not lying or anything. I promise you, I am perfectly fine. Other than this debacle, which is more drama than I was prepared to handle today, I am genuinely happy with both my career and my personal life,” Sam answered, having gained his courage through the strength that Lucifer was portraying. 

“And you didn’t think to tell me that you were seeing someone?” 

Sam groaned, causing Lucifer to snicker. ‘ _You’re on your own with that one,_ ’ Lucifer mouthed and Sam pushed him playfully away. 

“I… I wanted to make sure he was someone worth calling home about,” Sam managed, giving her the same excuse he had given Dean. He noticed as Lucifer’s eyebrows practically flew to the top of his forehead and he pulled the man in close before he had a chance to step away from him. Luce grumbled but stayed beside him, clearly unhappy with Sam’s word choice. 

  
“And is he?”  
“He is, Momma,” Sam answered easily, earning a forehead kiss from his boyfriend.  
“I think I still need to make my way over there.”  
“Why? It’s not true, I’m fine. It’s just going to require going a bit more public than we were ready for.”  
“Because somebody’s ass still needs to get kicked and if isn’t this Lucifer fella’s, then I’m going to find out whose it is,” she snapped back, causing Lucifer to laugh loudly.  
“Dean said the exact same thing. Why don’t you call him and plot your revenge away from the lawyer’s ears, yeah?”  
“I’ve had a good life, I could handle prison.”  


Lucifer couldn’t handle it anymore and he squeezed Sam tight. “Hell, I love your mom.” 

“You better love me because I had considered just getting on the plane and showing up without warning Sam. I thought he might get some comfort out of hearing that his momma was on the way though, so I decided to call. Don’t think you’re getting out of introducing me though, Winchester,” Ellen snarked back in response and Sam grinned. 

  
“I will, don’t you worry. Now, we have to go, there are things to be handled.”  
“I’m going to be confirming your story with Dean, young man. I love you.”  
“Ask my dear brother about a certain surgeon who wears dinosaur scrubs, yeah? Love you, bye!” Sam hung up the phone before she could ask what the hell he was talking about and Lucifer snickered.  


“You play dirty, Winchester.” 

“I just need her off my case for a bit. I have other things to worry about.” 

“Yeah, like the fact that you haven’t told your mother about me yet.” 

“I was merely protecting you.” 

“I’m a big boy. I think I can handle your-” 

“Tip number one: never underestimate Ellen Harvelle.” 

Lucifer laughed and wrapped his arms around Sam, pressing a kiss to the tip of his nose before burying his face and closing his eyes. 

“We gotta get ready to face the piranhas,” Lucifer mumbled against his skin. 

* * *

All of their work planned for after lunch had to be postponed as they prepared to make a public statement. Lucifer had insisted that a visible, verbal statement would be more impactful than Sam just releasing a written one. There would be no proof that Sam’s words weren’t coerced or that they were even written by him. They got Meg to respond to exactly one reporter, granting permission to come to Alighieri Law for an exclusive interview. 

The giant paced the length of Lucifer’s office for half an hour before the reporter’s arrival, claiming repeatedly that he ‘did not sign up for this.’ Lucifer had tried to console him at first before realizing it was useless and eventually began to ignore him, allowing him to get his dramatics out before the camera arrived. 

When the reporter arrived, there was a quick flurry where chairs were being rearranged, additional lights were brought in, and the sound tested. When everything was deemed suitable, the couple sat side-by-side with the high-strung woman sitting two feet to their left. 

“Ladies and Gentlemen, my name is Jennifer Moore and I am here with Lucifer Alighieri, of Alighieri Law, and his intern, Sam Winchester. After this photo-” she paused and the couple could only assume that the photograph that Kevin had released was on the screen. “-an uproar has occurred regarding Mr. Winchester’s safety. I am with them both today to allow them to set the record straight. Mr. Winchester?” 

When the attention was turned towards the couple, Sam straightened up and quickly took over, his entire nervous demeanor changing into a suave and take-charge attitude. 

“My name is Sam Winchester and I have been employed here at Alighieri Law for six months. It has come to my attention - and the attention of many others - that a former employee here has decided to speak out on my behalf regarding how I have been treated by Mr. Alighieri. We have found it vital to clear up any misconceptions regarding the situation, as I am romantically involved with Mr. Alighieri. The photographic proof that has been provided was that of a private, _consensual_ act of affection. 

“We both appreciate the concern that has been shown regarding the situation and are overjoyed that so many people are taking sexual harassment complaints so seriously. This is partially why we found it so necessary to be quick to correct the information being spread - false allegations can be life-ruining **and** can lead to _real_ situations being ignored.” 

When Sam finished speaking, Lucifer lifted their intertwined hands to his lips, kissing the back of Sam’s hand before speaking to the camera. 

“Thank you to everyone who has expressed concern for Mr. Winchester’s well-being and please remember that if you are dealing with a true case of sexual harassment, your friends here at Alighieri Law are more than willing to help," Lucifer wrapped up their statement with a bright smile. Their reporter finished up the sequence before the camera cut out and before long, was on her way out the door. The couple stared at each other wide-eyed for a minute before they both began to laugh. 

“You’ve been acting like such a dramatic little shit all afternoon and then you go and do _that_? Who was that?” Lucifer demanded with a grin, wrapping his arms around Sam’s neck. Sam pushed him away with a smirk. 

“That was courtroom Sam. He’s a lot more eloquent than boyfriend Sam.” 

They both laughed, sharing a lingering kiss before growing a bit more serious. 

“So I think some things need to change so we can avoid situations like that again,” Lucifer spoke carefully, relaxing a bit when Sam nodded. 

“Yeah, I agree. What are you thinking?” 

They both sat down, holding onto each other’s hands as they began to discuss some rules. 

“So it looks like trying to only be affectionate in private isn’t really working. Maybe we need to cool it off even more while we’re at work,” Lucifer started.   
“As if there’s nothing between us when we’re here?”  
“Mr. Alighieri and Mr. Winchester while we’re in this building-”  
“The courthouse too.”  
“And Lucifer and Sam elsewhere.”  


They both looked at each other for a long time, quiet. 

“It’s going to be hard,” Sam finally murmured.   
“Extremely.”  
“But I really don’t want to deal with another situation like this.”   
“Which is why we need the boundaries,” Lucifer pointed out and Sam nodded in agreement, both looking forlorn about their agreement.   
“No more sealing with a kiss.”   
“I’ll count them up and demand them as payment as soon as we leave.”   


“I think that might suffice,” Sam said, squeezing Lucifer’s hand and glancing at the time. He sighed, getting to his feet. “I told Mr. Novak and Ms. Bradbury that I’d drop some stuff off at the courthouse before the end of the day. Do you need anything taken down?” 

Lucifer got up, gathering a few files and handing them over. “I’ll see you in a bit, ba- Mr. Winchester.” 

Sam’s stomach churned as he gave his boss a very weak smile. “In a bit, Mr. Alighieri,” he mumbled, closing the office door behind him when he walked out.


	9. Are You Ready for Our Next Step?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No warnings for this one! Just sit back and join the boys on their journey. 
> 
> Enjoy! xxx

As Lucifer and Sam kept a close eye on reactions to their public response, Ellen continued to express her disapproval in being kept out of the loop of her son’s relationships. After getting off the phone with Sam earlier in the week, she had immediately called Dean, who confirmed that her Sam was sickeningly in love with the man that she had begun to believe was taking advantage of him. When that conversation settled down, she tacked on a question relating to Sam’s last comment on the phone: 

“So who is the man with the dinosaur scrubs?” 

“Uh, Ma, I gotta go-” 

“Dean Winchester, you can’t let me fuss about Sam not telling me things just for you to leave me out of the loop too. Who is he?” 

“His name is Castiel,” Dean muttered reluctantly. “Castiel Alighieri.” 

“Is that Lucifer’s brother?” 

“The one and only.” 

“That’s… interesting. And are things serious? Is it a real relationship?” 

“It is, Ma. It actually is.” 

“Then I need to meet _both_ of the Alighieri boys then, it seems.” 

\-- 

Ellen was not to be stopped. There was no talking her out of it and that weekend, they ended up all having Sunday dinner over video chat. Ellen had roped Bobby and Jo into joining her while Sam, Dean, and their partners were all over at Lucifer’s. Sam and Lucifer were finishing cooking when the annoying ringer on the videochat app started playing from the laptop on the table and Dean answered his mother. 

“Ma, you’re early. The girls aren’t done cooking dinner.” 

“Nice to see you too, Dean,” she remarked dryly, not amused as Jo got up to rearrange the camera and the screen. 

“Dinner’s right here, you can calm down,” Sam stated, coming out of the kitchen with two plates in hand. Lucifer followed with the last two and beckoned for Cas to join them at the table. Dean distracted his family as they all got set up, watching with amusement as Sam used a heavy hand to pour three glasses of wine. 

“You got beer in this house?” He asked, covering his wine glass with his hand to keep Sam from pouring him any. Lucifer reluctantly retrieved a beer bottle from the fridge, placing it in front of Dean and sitting down as Sam adjusted the computer so all four of them could be seen. 

“There’s my boys!” Ellen commented and Jo waved happily at her brothers while Bobby grunted, lifted a hand, and continued to eat his own dinner. 

“Hey! So I guess introductions are in order,” Sam greeted, as his brother had already shoved a large spoonful of garlic potatoes into his mouth. “This is my partner, Lucifer,” he explained, squeezing Lucifer’s shoulder. “And on the other side of Dean is Castiel. Guys, this is Momma Ellen, our pa, Bobby, and our little sister, Jo.” 

“It’s a pleasure to meet the ones who made my Sammy into the man he is today,” Lucifer greeted with a smile and Cas nodded in agreement while Sam blushed and Dean continued to stuff his face. 

“Got yourself a sweet talker, huh?” Ellen directed at Sam, causing him to laugh. 

“Best lawyer in the state of California - he better be a good sweet talker,” Sam retorted, getting an elbow in the ribs. 

“You know, I’m certified to practice law nationwide,” Lucifer added with a smirk. 

“And now he’s just fishing for compliments,” Sam explained with a snicker, taking a bite of his salmon. Lucifer laughed, taking a sip of his wine as the conversation turned to his brother. 

“Well, this one’s a lawyer, what about you, Castiel? What do you do?” Bobby asked and Cas smiled, sitting up a bit straighter. 

“I’m chief of pediatric surgery,” he started, then got into a conversation with Jo, as she was interested in entering the medical field. It allowed the others to get a headstart on their dinner; Dean had whined when he heard what was on the menu in the elder Alighieri’s home for the night yet, after trying his fish, there wasn’t another complaint out of him (although he did slide his asparagus onto Castiel’s plate while he was distracted). 

Sam and Lucifer had been listening idly but mostly just focused on their food until Jo called for his attention. 

“So Lucifer!” She shouted and Lucifer looked up, raising an eyebrow at the usage of such a loud tone of voice. She didn’t react and just leaned in closer to the camera. “You’re Sam’s boss, right?” She asked, as if she was digging for juicy gossip. He nodded and she got even closer. “How old are you?” 

“Jo!” Sam shouted at the same time that his mother yelled, “Joanna Beth!” She had the decency to look a bit embarrassed but Lucifer just laughed. 

“It’s okay, I’m not offended,” he responded easily, squeezing Sam’s shoulder. “Jo, to answer your question, I am forty-two.” 

“What?!” She asked, her eyes wide. “But Sam is only-” she started, getting cut off. 

“Sam is a grown man who can make his own decisions regarding his romantic life and his partners,” Sam said about himself, giving his sister a look. While Sam was highly irritated, Dean found it hilarious, laughing loudly. Lucifer merely smirked, kissing Sam’s cheek. 

“Don’t know if my opinion matters, but I’m very pleased that he made the decision he did about me,” he shrugged, looking at Jo with a smile. Sam’s maturity made up for what he lacked in age and it had honestly never been an issue between them, thankfully. 

“I don’t know, don’t you just find it weird?” Jo asked, unable to help herself. It was Bobby who cut in, ending the conversation once and for all. 

“Sam’s right, Jo, he’s a grown man. And if his fella is makin’im happy, so be it.” 

Sam thanked his father for bringing an end to his sister’s antics and dinner was generally uneventful after that. Lucifer was obviously not the kind of man who would give in to the third degree and Castiel just radiated such a pureness that there wasn’t much for the Harvelle-Singer family to nitpick him about. In the end, both men received a temporary seal of approval, to be reevaluated when they finally met in person. 

* * *

When the alarm clock sounded on Monday morning, Sam groaned and reached over to turn it off before shutting his eyes again. Almost immediately, the body that had just been pressed against him shifted and all four of the man’s limbs wrapped tightly around Sam’s body. 

“Don’t you dare move,” Lucifer mumbled against Sam’s chest. 

“Luce, we have to go to work. Come on,” he murmured, trying to push Lucifer off of him but the man had a superglue-grip on him. 

“I’m the boss, I don’t _have_ to do anything. 

“And I’m the intern, which means I have to do _everything_.” 

For some reason, that got Lucifer to let him go. But as Sam sat up and stretched before getting to his feet, Lucifer just buried his face under a pillow and pulled the blankets back up. 

“Babe, come on,” Sam urged, yanking the blanket down and exposing Lucifer’s bare body to the chill of the room. 

“You made your point. You have to get up. But I don’t see why that means I have to,” Lucifer complained as Sam literally lifted him out of the bed. 

“Can’t carpool if you aren’t ready to leave on time. Can’t save the planet if we don’t carpool,” Sam said with a smirk, unceremoniously dropping the man down back onto the bed. 

“Bullshit. You just think I should suffer if you do,” Lucifer corrected bitterly, watching Sam walk away to the bathroom. The giant swung his hips a little more than necessary as he shrugged. 

“Yeah, that too,” he said with a smirk. He disappeared into the ensuite but his head appeared around the doorway a moment later. 

“Come save the planet and shower with me?” 

\-- 

Despite Sam forcing Lucifer out of bed, their shower escapades had them pressed for time. Sam stood in front of the mirror, brushing his hair as Lucifer dressed, humming some tune that Sam didn’t recognize. 

“Why don’t we ever stay at your place?” Lucifer asked, stopping with whatever song he had been entertaining himself with. 

Sam glanced over at the elder, raising an eyebrow. Lucifer’s long fingers were twisting an expensive tie into a pretentious knot and he wasn’t even actually looking at his boyfriend as he spoke. 

“Uh. Because I don’t really have a ‘place.’” 

Lucifer shot him a look, tilting his head a bit in a way that reminded Sam of Castiel. 

“Must I remind you that you live on Townsend Avenue with your brother? I have dropped you off there frequently,” Lucifer sounded indignant, slightly offended. 

Sam sighed and grabbed his shoes, sitting down on the end of the bed to put them on. “I didn’t mean it in that way, I just… look, I sleep on the pull-out couch in the place that Dean and I share. And as much as I’m sure you would love to stay the night in a shitty little apartment just yards away from my big brother, I barely fit on the sofa myself. Much less both of us,” Sam admitted, refusing to make eye contact. His boyfriend obviously knew about his money situation, but Sam had never told him that he didn’t even have a proper bed in his apartment with Dean. 

It wasn’t Dean’s fault. When Sam had finished at Stanford, moving back in with Dean was the most reasonable option. But Dean had just moved into a one bedroom closer to the garage he had recently opened, as every cent he had went into the opening of the shop. Sam hadn’t minded taking the pull-out couch; hell, they had obviously had worse sleeping conditions before. Both of them were doing better now moneywise: the shop had taken off and Dean’s excellent work had given him a solid reputation around town, plus Sam’s internship paid more than most in the state. But with Sam’s student loans still hovering over him (despite Lucifer’s insistence that he was more than willing to pay them for him), it just wasn’t time to move into a bigger place. 

Lucifer stayed quiet and moved about the room to brush his own hair in front of his vanity mirror. After a long silence between the two of them, he was the one who spoke next: 

“Move in with me then.” 

Sam sputtered and looked up at his employer with wide eyes. “What?” 

“It’s not like you don’t practically live here already. You stay over almost every night and from what you’ve claimed prior, over half of your stuff is already here. Move in with me.” 

Lucifer wasn’t looking at him. Sam didn’t know where his sudden panic was stemming from: the proposition or Lucifer’s casual attitude. 

“Don’t you think it’s a little too soon? I mean, we haven’t necessarily-” Sam started, but Lucifer cut him off by striding across the room and cupping his cheeks. 

“Sam, I told you that I wanted you to be my last first kiss, did I not?” 

All Sam could do was nod. 

“And I meant it. So if you’re my last, then does it matter if it’s a little soon? You’re all I want. You are my world, Samuel William Winchester.” There was a possessive look in Lucifer’s eyes that should’ve made Sam worried but it honestly just aroused him instead. He finally nodded. 

“I guess… I guess I’m moving in then,” he said with a small smile. The smile grew as Lucifer sealed it with a kiss. 

They were both very late for work. 

* * *

“You’re doing what?!” Dean shouted, jumping up from the couch after Sam made his announcement regarding his living situation. When he had come home after work, he had found Dean on the couch, watching TV with a beer in one hand and the other wrapped around Castiel’s shoulders. Sam had paused, taking a minute to smile and take in the two: Dean was clad in a pair of jeans and a ratty band t-shirt while Cas was still in a pair of Batman scrubs. So maybe he just took the plunge with the hope that Castiel’s presence would calm Dean’s reaction. 

It did not. 

Castiel, God bless him, did get to his feet and take Dean’s arm, holding him back from beating some sense into his brother. Dean did not feel any shame in his reaction whether Cas was present or not and immediately continued to yell at Sam. 

“You ain’t even been with him that long, Sam! You can’t just go making the decision to move in with that bas-” Dean stopped as Castiel straightened up and gave him an icy glare. 

“I advise you to remember that Lucifer is my brother before you say anything else,” Castiel said and Sam watched as Dean was smart enough to at least look ashamed that he was about to trash-talk Castiel’s family. 

“Cas, this ain’t personal, it’s just-” 

“Dean, look at me… No, not at Sam, at me. Breathe,” Cas ordered and Sam’s jaw dropped as Dean looked in Cas’ eyes and, albeit reluctantly, began to match his breathing. He knew that Castiel’s patience for Dean was unmatched but he supposed he hadn’t realized exactly how intense their connection was. “Sam is a grown man, is he not?” Cas finally asked, when he deemed Dean calm enough. 

“He’s my baby brother.” 

“He’s a grown man.” 

“Yeah, but-” 

“Dean. He is a grown man.” 

“...Yeah.” 

“And you were just telling me _yesterday_ how happy he seems, yeah?” 

Dean glared at Castiel, as if he had revealed some deep dark secret that he never should’ve said aloud in front of Sam. He glanced at his brother before looking back at Cas, sighing. 

“Yeah, he’s fucking happy.” 

“So because he’s a grown man and because he’s happy with Lucifer, he’s going to move in with him. I hate to break it to you but he wasn’t asking your permission. He was telling you that he was going to,” Cas said softly, breaking eye contact with Dean in order to glance a little higher, as Sam was now standing behind Dean. Dean turned and Sam slipped a glass with three fingers of whiskey into his hand. 

“I love him, Dean,” Sam said simply, giving him an apologetic look. “And if, God forbid, something goes wrong, if he’s not the man that he has proven himself to be, if he breaks my heart… I’ll come crawling back to my big brother. And you can go kick his ass,” Sam explained, giving Dean a cheeky grin. He glanced over Dean’s shoulder, seeing that Castiel had already walked away in order to give them a bit of privacy. “And besides, if I’m gone, you get a little more alone-time with the Doc.” 

Dean pushed his shoulder back, huffing, and Sam grinned, hugging his brother quickly. 

“Fine. Move in with the guy. But you’re telling Momma.” 

\-- 

Sam, in fact, did not tell Ellen that he was moving out. Deciding that Lucifer’s existence was enough for at least a week, he focused on getting the rest of his things packed up. Embarrassingly enough, there wasn’t much left in his and Dean’s apartment that belonged to him. Three-fourths of his clothing already resided at Lucifer’s and he had a full set of all of his hygiene products in the master bathroom months ago. Granted, there were a few small appliances in their apartment (like the blender) that Sam had originally bought but there was no need in bringing them to Lucifer’s house. His kitchen was fully stocked with state-of-the-art equipment. 

So he filled two small cardboard boxes with the rest of his belongings before sitting back down on the couch, a heavy feeling in his stomach as Dean came out of his room with a beer bottle in hand, having said goodbye to Castiel an hour before. 

“Lucifer coming to whisk you away?” 

“Not tonight,” Sam answered quietly before offering a smile and patting the spot beside him on the couch. Even though he had spent most of his time in the past few months at Lucifer’s, it didn’t keep it from feeling like goodbye. And considering he had lived with Dean for… well, forever, he felt oddly emotional for someone who was only moving about twenty minutes away. The air was heavy between the brothers as Dean sat, putting on Die Hard for the millionth time and wrapping an arm around Sam. 

“You know this isn’t goodbye, right? You’ll always be my big brother. I’m just twenty minutes down the road.” 

“Look, Sammy, I followed you out to California. Ain’t no man going to come between us and I know that. Just… not used to living on my own, you know? Even when you were living in the dorms, you practically lived with me anyways.” 

“You have Castiel. I wasn’t just being an ass earlier. Maybe with your baby brother out of the way, you can see where that’s going to take you. Maybe you two will be moving in together someday. And in the meantime… I need to see where this can go with Luce. He makes me feel like I can conquer the world, you know?” 

Dean was quiet for a minute before just tugging Sam closer, until his head full of hair landed on Dean’s shoulder, solid and warm. And because it was what they both needed, Sam didn’t move an inch. 

\-- 

As soon as the last bits of Sam’s belongings found their place, he threw himself onto the bed, yawning loudly. 

“All moved in?” Lucifer asked around his toothbrush, poking his head out of the bathroom. 

“Safe to say, yeah,” he answered with a smile, watching as Lucifer disappeared once more to finish up his nighttime routine. When he finally returned, he was holding something small in his hand. 

“Okay, so here’s the deal. You’ve moved in and you’re finally saying fuck it, we’re in this for real, right?” 

Sam nodded, giving him a curious look. 

“Good. Now, you’re not going to fight me on this,” Lucifer said, giving it a moment to sink in before pressing a silver piece of plastic into Sam’s palm. Before Sam could even figure out what it was, Lucifer continued. “I will not monitor your usage. I _hope_ that you feel comfortable enough to use this for your day-to-day purchases. But if you don’t, I will not complain. But I want you to have this. I want you to know that _I_ consider it yours as well, no strings attached. And for my own peace of mind, I want you to have it so that I know if you’re going without something, it’s because you’re a stubborn little shit and not because you can’t have it.” 

Sam listened without interrupting, just looking down at the credit card in his hand. Part of him still wanted to argue about it, to tell Lucifer he didn’t need it and he could shove it up his ass. But a bigger part realized that this was just Lucifer’s way of taking care of him. So he nodded and reached over, placing the credit card on his nightstand to be place in his wallet in the morning. 

“Thank you, Luci,” he murmured. The smile he got back made swallowing his pride worth it.


	10. Remember Why You Went Into Law

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Smut warnings: anal beads, anal sex, and cum-eating.  
> It's easy to avoid if you don't wanna read - it's the first part of the chapter and is separated off by a break!  
> There's another sad flashback but nothing really to warn about. 
> 
> Enjoy!! xxx

Living with Lucifer was proving to be just fine. The world hadn’t exploded after his first night officially not living with Dean and when Sam swiped Lucifer’s credit card when he went grocery shopping, he didn’t ignite on fire. He and Dean made it a point to have dinner together at least twice a week, just the two of them - if Cas or Luce joined, it didn’t count. It kept things from feeling so _final_. 

Sam was preparing their lunches for tomorrow with Lucifer keeping him company by cleaning up their dinner dishes. As he took the chicken off the grill to cut up, Lucifer shot him a look. 

“You keep making more dishes to wash.” 

“Do you want to eat tomorrow or…?” 

“Can’t you make food without giving me more to clean?” 

“I cook, you clean. If you wanna cook, I will gladly take over dish duty,” Sam grinned at Lucifer’s whining, knowing they weren’t true complaints. They had found a very happy medium when it came to cooking and cleaning, often sharing the responsibilities of both each night if they were both there when dinner was being prepared. Sam was also making an attempt at teaching Lucifer how to meal plan and, while they weren’t preparing a week’s worth of food on Sunday nights, there was a weekly grocery list that kept them from making emergency runs for dinner items after work. 

Or, in Lucifer’s case, paying Lily a little extra to go pick up the chives that he didn’t realize he forgot until he had started cooking. And then paying her a little more when she arrived because _where were the goddamn potatoes_? 

And overall, it was working. 

Lucifer finished up the dishes and grabbed his glass of wine, propping himself up on the counter beside Sam as the younger man finished up, zipping up their lunchbags and placing them into the fridge. 

“Thanks for making me lunch, Daddy, do I get a chocolate milk too?” Lucifer asked, eyes full of mirth as Sam flipped him off. He wiped down the counters and washed his hands before sidling up into the space between Lucifer’s legs. He snatched the wine glass from him, taking a sip before moving it away and kissing him. 

“Pretty sure the wrong man is being called ‘Daddy’ right now, old man,” he teased, nipping at Lucifer’s neck. It earned him a delicious growl where Lucifer grabbed his hair, pulling him in for a bruising kiss. They stayed there for awhile, hands and mouths exploring until the height difference got too frustrating. Typically, for Sam, placing someone on a counter would bring them up to an ideal height to match his own. But Lucifer was already practically his size, making him even taller than Sam as he sat there. 

“Bedroom,” Sam mumbled, yanking him off of the countertop. Lucifer’s legs wrapped around Sam’s waist instead of going to the ground and _fuck_ , despite being almost as large as Sam himself, the younger man carried him with ease. 

Sam tossed Lucifer onto the bed, immediately working on the buttons of his own shirt. He got pulled down when there were only two left, Lucifer devouring his mouth and making quick work of Sam’s button-up. Sam repaid the favor even though Lucifer’s shirt was already half-open from the escapades in the kitchen, tossing it off to the side as he bit down on Lucifer’s neck. A loud moan escaped Luci’s lips as his hands slid down the muscles of Sam’s back and landed on his ass, aligning their hips for some much-needed friction. 

“F-fuck, Lu,” Sam mumbled, eyes darkening with lust as he kissed his man. “Too many clothes,” he managed and Lucifer let go of him so Sam could pull away just long enough to get them both in their underwear. They both sighed in mutual relief and Sam’s mouth found its way to Lucifer’s clavicles, running his tongue along the two little dips and then using his teeth to nip at the bone there. Lucifer’s hands were embedded into Sam’s hair, keeping him close as went further down, taking way too much time to kiss and suck at his nipples and then his stomach. 

Precum was already making a wet spot on the front of Lucifer’s briefs and Sam eyed the dark spot hungrily before mouthing over it. The heat went through the thin fabric, causing Lucifer to gasp as Sam’s mouth worked over him without actually touching him. It was hot at first but his need soon overtook him, Sam's actions just leaving him desperate. 

“S-Sam,” he whined, pulling at Sam’s hair. It got him to pull away with a smirk and he shifted, reaching into the nightstand for a bottle of lube. When he found it, he shimmied out of his underwear, pouring it on his fingers and reaching around behind him. 

“Fuck! At least let me watch,” Lucifer whined as Sam began to make some delightful noises. His partner did grant him this, turning around and letting Lucifer watch as one of his fingers slowly made its way in and out of his hole. Lucifer groaned, grabbing onto Sam’s hips but not interrupting, merely watching. “You can take another one, Sammy, c’mon. Your pretty little hole can’t possibly be satisfied with just a finger,” he coaxed. It worked, as Sam slowly entered a second finger and Lucifer watched as the slick digit disappeared inside of him. “Work yourself open, baby. You gotta work it open for me, let me in.” 

Sam had planned on teasing more than he did, making a little show out of it, but Lucifer’s voice just did something to him that he couldn’t explain. He quickly allowed Lucifer to take control, telling him exactly what to do as he stretched himself. 

“Keep going, baby, I’m going to be right here,” Lucifer urged as he got up from the bed, retrieving a box from underneath the bed. He searched through it, finding what he was looking for before making his way back to Sam. “You’re taking your fingers so well, Sammy… Do you want a third one or do you want me to give you a little treat?” He asked, his fingertips grazing over Sam’s hip. 

“T-treat, please,” Sam managed, sliding his fingers out of of himself and propping himself back up on all fours with his ass facing Lucifer. He could hear the sound of the lube and he resisted the urge to look over his shoulder, knowing it would defeat the purpose. If Lucifer wanted him to know what it was, he would’ve told him. 

Lucifer’s fingertip traced his rim for a moment before he slowly pushed the toy in, letting one small bead push inside of him. Sam immediately realized what it must be and he whined, shaking his hips. 

“Do you need another one, Sam?” Lucifer asked and Sam nodded frantically, causing Lucifer to chuckle as he pushed another, wider bead past Sam’s rim. It took just a bit more effort than the first, but not much due to Sam’s previous stretching. Sam seemed to be happy, moaning quietly as he let Lucifer play with him. Just as a third bead breached him, the toy began to vibrate and Sam squeaked, gasping for air as the smallest one got pushed right up against his prostate. 

“Fuck, Luce, Luce, it’s… it’s right there, it’s too much, don’t wanna..” 

“You’re not going to cum before I say so because you’re so good for me, aren’t you? You know how to be good for me,” Lucifer urged, running one hand over the small of Sam’s back, wanting to soothe him. It took a minute for Sam to stop trembling, to try to get still for him again before Lucifer could start working the fourth bead in. Sam gasped as he was stretched open once more, the vibrating beads now pushing further inside of him. “Look at you.. So good, so beautiful,” he murmured and Sam preened under the praise, finding his motivation not to beg Lucifer to stop and just fuck him. 

“There’s one more, Sam. Can you be a good boy for me and take the last one? Do you think you can do it?” He asked, watching as Sam whined but nodded. Lucifer held onto Sam’s hip with one hand, the pad of his thumb running comforting circles over the skin as the other slowly pushed the final, biggest bead into his partner. Sam gasped, reaching down to his cock and grabbing the base of it, squeezing tightly for a moment as he tried to get his self-control back. Lucifer allowed it for a moment before gently moving Sam’s hand out of the way and running his tongue over the stretched rim. Sam almost screamed at the added stimulation, legs trembling as he struggled to stay upright. 

“Th-thank you,” Sam managed, gripping tightly to the comforter. The beads vibrated inside of him and he heard the sound of Lucifer lubing himself up. He looked over his shoulder to find his partner lazily stroking himself, eyes locked on Sam’s hole that was struggling to close around the fifth bead. 

“C-can I have your cock now?” Sam asked and Lucifer looked at his face with a gentle smile before reaching forward, running a fingertip around Sam’s rim. 

“Do you think you’re stretched enough now?” 

“Yes.. Yes, I do, please. Please, m’ready for you. More than ready. Just need you inside me now,” Sam pleaded, growing almost hysterical as Lucifer gave the beads a tug. It was sharp but not strong enough to pull them out. 

“I’ve got you, shh,” Lucifer urged, pressing a kiss to Sam’s ass before slowly working the beads out of him, turning the vibrations down a notch each time. “You know I’ll always take care of you,” he reminded, pulling the smallest bead out and putting the toy aside to be washed later. Sam whined at the emptiness and Lucifer laid down on his back. 

“Turn around, Sammy. Look at me and ride my cock,” Lucifer’s voice hit Sam’s ears and he frantically turned around, laying eyes on Lucifer’s erection. He wasted no time in getting up, sinking down onto the length until he had taken all of him, crying out. Lucifer was quick to hold his hips and urge him to lay down, pressing kisses to Sam’s shoulders and cheeks as he tried to calm him down. The boy was already on the verge of orgasm and wanted- no, needed, to prolong it, craving the feeling of the man inside of him. 

When Sam thought he could move without cumming, he sat back up and began to move his hips in little figure-eight’s. Lucifer groaned but kept his mouth shut, knowing that Sam wouldn’t be able to resist for long. And he was right, as Sam soon lifted himself up only to drop back down, quickly setting a brutal pace. Lucifer couldn’t complain as he found that he was just as close to the edge as Sam was. In assistance, he planted his feet and began to match Sam halfway. 

It was when Sam began to let out desperate whimpers, his nails digging into Lucifer’s sides that he was given a nod. 

“Cum for me. You’ve been so good, you can cum for me,” he urged. It took all of two more thrusts before Sam cried out, shooting his load and hitting both his own chest and Lucifer’s. Lucifer had stilled for a moment but Sam shook his head, trembling as he worked through his orgasm. 

“Keep going,” Sam urged, which was all the motivation that Lucifer needed. He grabbed onto Sam’s hips tightly, flipping them around without pulling out. He immediately began to thrust into Sam’s tight heat once more, listening as Sam urged him on. With a final, harsh thrust, he hit his orgasm, crying out and leaning over Sam’s body. Sam’s lips found his and they shared a long, urgent kiss as they both worked their way down. 

When Lucifer could breathe again, he sat up and slowly began to pull out, watching as his cum worked its way out of Sam. With a glance at Sam’s blissed out face, he leaned down, swiping his tongue across the mess, earning an overstimulated shriek from Sam. He crawled back up, sharing a kiss with Sam, who quickly recognized the surprise substance in his mouth. If anything, his kiss became more urgent and Lucifer would’ve laughed if Sam hadn’t been sucking on his tongue. When all traces were kissed away, Sam released him and Lucifer fell to the bed beside him, closing his eyes as he wrapped his arms around Sam. 

Sticky fingers touched his lips a moment later though and he blinked his eyes open to see that Sam had gotten his cum from his own chest and was now holding it at his mouth. Lucifer smirked, a dark flash in his eyes as he took the digits into his mouth, swirling his tongue around them until they were clean once more. 

“Fuck,” Sam mumbled, burying his face in Lucifer’s chest as the older man merely chuckled. 

* * *

“No, no, no! You’re fucking kidding me!” Sam shouted, shaking his laptop screen. He didn’t even care that he was interrupting the others in the office, he was in too much of a panic. Jessica got up, coming over to him and placing a hand on his shoulder before moving the laptop out of reach. 

“Sam, yelling at the screen isn’t going to fix it. What’s wrong?” 

“It’s gone for, Jess. It’s been on its last leg for a while now, I thought it would last me at least another month or so,” he groaned, placing his forehead down on the desk. 

“Well that sucks but-” 

“I’ve been working on my dissertation all morning. I haven’t saved anything since I got here,” he explained, closing his eyes. Because of this, he didn’t see her blanch. 

“Oh no, Sam…” she tried, placing a hand on his shoulder once more. He jerked away from her and got up, grabbing the device and walking out of the room in search of their IT department. 

They couldn’t help and when Sam booted up a company computer two hours later and pulled up his dissertation from his USB, he could’ve cried at the loss of hours worth of work. He reached for his phone, set to text Lucifer and see if he could come up, but remembered their agreement about keeping things strictly professional at work and set it down. 

As if that wasn’t bad enough, a text came through from Bobby a little while later: 

_[From: Pa]  
Jo got into a car accident. Paramedics are saying she’s okay but we’re on our way to the hospital now to make sure there’s nothing internal. Send positive thoughts. Love you, son. BS _

Sam had immediately called, needing more information about his little sister. There wasn’t much more and after promising to keep him updated, Bobby had to go. As soon as the dial-tone rang in his ear, Sam dialed his brother’s number, wanting to make sure he was the one to alert him of the news. 

\-- 

Therefore, it was simple to say that Sam’s day had been more than a little rough. He didn’t speak more than a few short sentences to his partner as they made their way out of the office and the car ride home was _tense_. Lucifer, God bless him, waited until they were home and sat Sam down on the edge of the bed, taking both of his hands. 

“Sam, will you please tell me why you’re so upset?” He asked, watching as Sam visibly grew an additional layer of armor against him. Lucifer sighed, wrapping both arms around him. “Hey, hey, baby, it’s me. It’s me, you can talk to me,” he whispered assurances. When Sam broke, tears began sliding down his cheeks. 

“It’s been a shitty day, okay? Jo got in a fucking car accident and she’s hurt and had to have emergency surgery and my laptop died before that which lost me _hours_ worth of work on my damn dissertation and I couldn’t fucking talk to _you_ like I wanted to because Mr. Alighieri doesn’t need to hear anything about Mr. Winchester’s personal life and I-” Sam’s sentence continued to the point where Lucifer honestly questioned his lung capacity before he finally stopped him. 

“Stop it and look at me,” he ordered. Sam actually did shut up, looking up at Lucifer with watery eyes. “Do we need to book a flight?” Lucifer asked, causing Sam to get a confused look on his face. 

“To Kansas, love. To see Jo. Do we need to book a flight so you can go and see her?” Lucifer clarified, which only caused Sam to get more upset, this time for a slightly different reason. When it was clear that Sam couldn’t actually talk to him right now, he sat down beside him, rubbing circles on his back for what felt like hours. What finally broke the silence was the ringer on Sam’s phone. It also broke the younger man out of his trance, as he jumped and reached for the device, answering it within seconds. 

“Hello?... Yeah… Oh thank God… Does she-... she’s a tough one, isn’t she?... Thank you, Ma. Really need this. Tell her I love her, okay? I love her and both me and Dean are in her corner if she needs us… I love you too, Mom. Go take care of Jo… Bye.” When Sam hung up the phone, he looked to Lucifer, who was just setting his own phone down. “She’s okay. There was some internal bleeding in her abdomen but they found it as soon as they opened her up. She’s already awake and she’s doing fine,” he announced, breathing properly again for the first time in hours. 

Lucifer smiled, hugging him tightly for a long time before releasing him. 

“Why don’t you go take a bath while I make us some dinner? After the way you’ve had your muscles tensed all day, I’m sure your body will thank me,” he urged. It took some convincing but he eventually had Sam walking off to the bathroom for a long soak in the jacuzzi. 

\-- 

After dinner, they were curled up on the couch when there was a brief knock at the door. Lucifer got up to answer it, finding his personal assistant, Lily, at the door with a rectangular box in her hands. He thanked her endlessly before saying goodbye and heading back inside. 

“Who was it, babe?” 

“Lily. She was dropping off something for me,” he explained, setting the box down beside the couch and sitting back down. 

“Ooh, what did you get?” 

“Doesn’t matter right this second.. Can we talk?” 

“Of course.” 

“Look, you had a really shitty day today. And maybe our new boundaries are a little too strict. Because if my man is having a rough day, I want to know about it so I can help. And I can’t help if you feel like you can’t talk to me,” he started, squeezing Sam’s hand. “What if we have an option to call for a boyfriend moment? If it’s _necessary_ , then we can use it if we need to talk about Sam and Lucifer things while at work. Because I hate hearing that you felt like you couldn’t talk to me today.” 

Sam was quiet for a minute, chewing on his lower lip before slowly nodding. 

“Can we? Please?” He asked in a whisper. Lucifer smiled and nodded, leaning forward to give him a soft kiss. 

“Of course,” he promised once he pulled away, reaching for the box. “As long as you don’t put up too much of a fuss about this, okay? You need it and I don’t want to hear any complaints.” 

Lucifer got to his feet as he placed the box in Sam’s lap. Knowing what kind of reaction was coming, he went ahead and walked away while Sam opened up the box, revealing his new laptop. 

“ ** _Lucifer!_** ” 

* * *

The movie they had been watching had gone off maybe ten minutes ago and the two had laid curled up together silently ever since. Lucifer’s hands were playing with Sam’s hair as his hazel eyes were shut, beaming under the attention from his partner. 

“Hey Sam?” Lucifer whispered. Sam hummed in response, blinking his eyes open slowly to look at him. 

“What’s your law dream?” He asked and Sam’s eyebrows furrowed in response. 

“What?” He asked, shifting a bit so he was on his side, facing Lucifer. 

“Your law dream. Come on, every lawyer has one. What did you go into law to do?” The elder urged, still twisting strands of brown hair around his fingers. He saw the transition in Sam’s face before he even began to speak. 

“When you study law, it opens a world of possibilities. You can-” Sam started, just to have Lucifer click his tongue and shake his head. 

“I don’t want your elevator speech, Sammy. I’m asking as your boyfriend,” he explained, giving an encouraging smile. “What do you really want to do with your law degree?” 

Sam was reluctant to answer, he could see that. Lucifer chalked it up to the fact that Sam was just all too aware that the conversation he was having was happening with his employer, even if the man had assured him that it wasn’t in a work context. 

“I… I guess my law dream would be to be able to do non-profit work,” he started carefully. The interest that immediately sparked in Lucifer’s eyes was obvious and he relaxed once he saw it. 

“Elaborate?” 

“I want to do non-profit advocacy for children,” he explained, watching as his words clicked in Lucifer’s head. “I uh, just really wish that there had been someone on our side when we were going through all of that shit when we were kids, you know? It shouldn’t have taken so long for the government to realize that we were on our own. And it wasn’t just us, there were dozens of kids out there, living on the streets. Granted, they were mostly older than us, but still. And then when we got placed into the system? God, it just… it sucked, Luce. They didn’t care. I met kids in those group homes who had been placed with families who beat the shit out of them. Some who got punished by not being allowed food. Some of these kids got placed with families that were worse than the ones that they were removed from in the first place and it didn’t matter to anyone.” Once Sam had gotten started, he was on a roll. 

“And do you know what happens when you turn eighteen in a group home? You’re gone, Lucifer. Goodbye, good riddance. You don’t have any life skills or money or a place to go but you gotta get out of there. And I just want to help. There are a lot of adolescents who need more than a social worker. They need a fucking fighting chance for justice,” he continued, making it clear that it was anger that fueled his passion. 

Lucifer wrapped his arms around Sam, keeping him grounded throughout his explanation. When it seemed clear that Sam was done, he spoke up. 

“So, what exactly are you doing at Alighieri? You chose a corporate and criminal law firm to settle in at?” he asked, trying to be tactful about it and failing miserably. It didn’t matter though as Sam obviously didn’t seem to be offended by it. He just shrugged and smiled sadly. 

“It’s a law _dream_ for a reason, right?” He said and moved to kiss Lucifer’s cheek when he saw the man’s face fall. “You pay well, babe. With the shape that I was in money-wise, there was no way that I could go for a non-profit. I had to go for what was going to put food on the table and keep a roof over me and Dean’s heads,” he explained, finding Lucifer’s hand and squeezing it tightly. “It may be what I _want_ to do but it wasn’t a wise choice survival-wise.” 

Lucifer frowned and held his partner tightly. He wanted to tell him that he could do it now, that his situation had changed drastically and he would fully be able to do what he wanted with his law degree without worrying about how to cover the bare essentials. But he also knew that it wasn’t that easy in Sam’s head. He remember their agreement regarding money, to understand where the other was coming from, and sighed, kissing Sam’s temple. 

“No matter what you do in your career, Sam, whether you stay at Alighieri forever or find your way to a non-profit firm, you’re going to kick ass. I have never seen anyone so full of potential - and I’m not just saying that because I’m your boyfriend. It’s true, I promise,” he finally settled on. Sam hummed contently, tilting his head in order to give Lucifer a proper kiss. When he pulled back, he whispered a declaration of love before laying his head down on Lucifer’s chest. They were both quiet for the next little bit, enjoying the comfortable silence before Lucifer decided to go for it. 

“Sam, can I ask you how you ended up on the streets? What happened to your parents?” He asked cautiously, making sure he could see Sam’s face to judge the man’s reaction to make sure he didn’t overstep. His face did grow dark but he didn’t seem to shut down as he processed the question and exactly how to answer it. Lucifer didn’t rush him, giving him all the time he needed to find the words. 

“I was eight, yeah? I’ve told you that,” Sam finally started with and Lucifer nodded, squeezing his hand once more. “There was a fire when I was six,” he said quietly, looking at the wall in front of him. “And I can’t for the life of me, no matter how hard I try, remember how it started. But my mom died that night. And uh, any motivation for life inside my dad died that night too. He took us to a long-stay hotel and we were there for a long time. He didn’t talk much, he just drank and went to work and me and Dean just… kept on, you know? We went to school and pretended nothing had ever happened. Nobody ever mentioned mom again. 

“And then, after a while, I was maybe seven and a half, Dad moved us into an apartment. We were so excited to get out of that hotel room - the kids at school were making it obvious that it wasn’t normal to live in a hotel, you know? And we thought that things were getting better. Dad wasn’t drinking as much and he was talking and hanging out with us… and of course, you know, the apartment. It was looking up. And then… uh, one morning…” Sam trailed off, a distant look in his eyes. 

* * *

__

_“Dean… Dean, wake up,” a seven-year-old Sam told his brother, shaking his shoulder. Dean groaned, reaching out and pushing Sam away from him. He rolled over in bed, pulling the blankets over his head in an attempt to block out the outside stimulation._

_“Dean, I’m hungry. Can you fix breakfast? Pleeeeease?”_

_“Ask Dad.”_

_“Can’t, he’s not here,” Sam said sadly. It got Dean’s attention and he rolled back over, pulling the blankets back to look at his brother._

_“Where is he?”_

_“I dunno, he was gone when I woke up. I didn’t think he had work today. Maybe he went to the store?”_

_“He went to the store two days ago, Sammy, remember? He got all those groceries?”_

_Dean’s logic didn’t matter to his baby brother - Sam didn’t care about anything right now other than breakfast._

_“There’s a note in the kitchen. You can read it after you fix me Lucky Charms,” Sam urged, pulling on Dean’s arm. The older boy got up with a sigh, following Sam into the kitchen and getting out a bowl and the box of cereal. Just like Sam had said, there was a folded piece of paper on the table with ‘DEAN’ written across it in his father’s handwriting. Even though he was itching to open it, he finished fixing Sammy’s bowl of cereal before he went near it._

_When he finally did, his blood ran cold, even though he didn’t quite know why yet. ****_

**_Dean,_**  
**_Take good care of Sammy. I love you both._**  
**_Dad_**

_Dean did his best not to show his emotion on his face as he walked over to the window, peeking out into the parking lot. He noticed the Impala missing and stepped away, having expected that. Sam wasn’t paying him any mind, too busy focusing on picking the marshmallows out of his cereal as Dean headed down the hallway to their father’s room. The bed was meticulously made and Dean reluctantly opened one of the dresser drawers. When he found it empty, his resolve broke as he immediately began to cry. He rushed to his father’s closet, throwing it open with a desperate hope to find John’s duffel bag at the bottom of it and his coat hanging up, but he had no such luck._

__

__

_John had left._

\-- 

_They had three days before Dean came home from school to find a bright yellow piece of paper taped to the door. He had made both of them continue to go to school, not knowing what else to do. But he knew at the sight of that sheet of paper that things were about to change for good. He snatched it off of the door as Sammy asked what it said. He dismissed him, stuffing it into his pocket while he made Sam some peanut butter crackers and a glass of juice. Dean waited until he was alone to pull the paper out of his pocket and smooth out the wrinkles._ ****

**_Dear Mr. Winchester,_**  
**_Multiple warnings have been issued regarding your failure to provide rent. Your rental agreement clearly states that rent is due on the fifth of every month. Due to your failure to uphold the agreement of your rental for two (2) months, Somerset Heights has no choice but to issue this notice of eviction._**  
**_You have been given a total of three (3) days to pay the indebted rent. Failure to comply will result in legal action, up to and including physical removal of all tenants from the apartment and the property._**  
**_If you have any questions, please contact the rental office and ask for Douglas Little._**

 _**Sincerely,**_  
**_Douglas Little_**  
**_Somerset Heights Property Manager_**

_Dean knew that the letter in his hands was the end to his life as he knew it._

* * *

“One morning, Dad just disappeared, vanished into thin air. We got evicted from our apartment right after. There wasn’t even a full week between him leaving and us spending our first night in an alleyway.” Sam looked over at Lucifer, whose eyes were full of pity but who also refused to voice it. He knew that it wasn’t what the man in his arms needed. 

“When Dean was seventeen, the police got in touch - they had found our Dad’s car but there was no trace of him. The car was given to Dean and our pa, Bobby, helped him get it back in tip-top shape… I’m quite convinced that he loves that damn Impala more than he loves me,” Sam managed a joke, giving Lucifer a weak smile. 

“The Impala was your dad’s?” He asked, obviously surprised. Sam nodded, relaxing even more into Lucifer’s embrace. 

“Yeah, it was.” 

“And you’ve still never found out what happened to him?” he asked, a bit incredulous. Sam shook his head sadly and Lucifer frowned. “What about a private detective? Do you think that would get you somewhere? You don’t even know if he’s dead or alive! It would-” Lucifer cut himself off when he saw the look on his boyfriend’s face. He had the decency to look ashamed and he sighed, kissing Sam’s cheek. “Sorry. I got a bit excited. I’m… Thank you, Sam, for sharing with me.” 

Sam gave him a small smile before kissing him gently. 

“I don’t need to know what happened to him, Lucifer. He was long dead before he left us. There’s no point in trying - we’ll either find out he’s dead or worse, he’s not and he left us alone to rot while he lived his life,” he explained, curling back into Lucifer’s embrace. “Just.. thank you, for always wanting to listen to me.”


	11. Hitting the Ground

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> J2 often talk about how the scenes they hate the most are the exposition scenes: they’re necessary to set up the plotline but they involve no emotion, no humor, etc. Welcome to the exposition scene, my loves. Take note that this next array of scenes takes place over the course of about a month. 
> 
> Enjoy! xxx

“Sam, can you take these files down to the courthouse please? They need to be signed by Judge Thompson and I need them before two,” Ms. Bradbury explained, passing over a stack of files. Sam glanced up at the clock on the wall, noting the time and wincing. 

“Yes ma’am, of course,” he confirmed, despite the short notice. With her dismissal, he headed back to his office to retrieve his messenger bag and securing the items inside before heading for the elevator to get down to the ground floor of the large building. 

“Winchester!” Sam turned around at the sound of his name, turning away from the opening elevator. 

“Mr. Novak, what can I do for you?” He asked, directing the source of the beckoning yell. A thick manilla envelope was thrust into his hands. 

“The Carter case. I would like for you to get caught up, you’ll be assisting me in the courtroom for the trial.” 

“Oh! Yes Sir, of course. When does the trial start?” Sam hadn’t had anything to do with the case - honestly, he hadn’t even heard it being brought up. It wasn’t unheard of, a lot of cases ran through the office that weren’t touched by anyone other than the acting lawyer. If he was taking something to trial though, he would need at the very least a week to- 

“Monday morning. You’ll have the weekend to prepare.” 

Fuck. 

“Yes, Sir. I would be glad to.” 

“Good. I'll be in touch, we can meet over the weekend to discuss our approach.” Gabriel Novak’s retreating form quickly disappeared and Sam sighed, turning to press the button to call the elevator back up to him. 

\-- 

“Saaam, I have sent you three texts in the past twenty minutes and you aren’t even packed up yet,” Lucifer whined, entering the intern’s office at half-past six. 

“I’m going to have to stay here for a while longer. You can go on ahead, I’ll find my way home in a bit, yeah? Mr. Novak wants me to assist in trial on Monday and this is the first time I’ve even looked at the case,” he explained, looking up from the papers that were spread out on his desk. Lucifer bit his lip for a moment, glancing at his wristwatch. 

“I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but we have dinner reservations with clients in an hour,” he reminded gently. Sam’s face lost color as he quickly clicked on his calendar in the corner of his laptop, reading the entry that confirmed that Lucifer was right. Looking down at the papers in defeat, he sighed and got to his feet, beginning to pack them all away. He’d have to work on it after dinner. 

\-- 

“They loved you, Sam. You were amazing tonight. Do you know how hard it usually is to get a business to sign a long-term contract? I usually have to meet with them at least five times, going back and forth. The Sandover contract is all ours and I think you’re the only one who can take credit for it,” Lucifer gushed, positively over the moon as he kicked off his shoes and headed for their bar area, pouring three fingers each of a single-malt scotch that Sam had never seen him touch. He handed a glass to Sam, who had found his way to the armchair, before holding his own up. “Cheers to you, Sammy, and an official, full-time job offer at Alighieri Law following your graduation,” he toasted, clinking his glass, taking a small sip, and kissing Sam breathless before he had a chance to respond to the offer. 

Sam had often wanted to bring up the conversation about how they were to handle things after he graduated but never figured out a good way to bring it up. He didn’t want to question Lucifer about whether it would be a good idea for him to stay or not because in the end, an invitation to come on to the staff at Alighieri hadn’t been offered. They both knew that a recommendation letter from Lucifer Alighieri himself would get Sam into any law firm he wanted, which seemed like it would be a safer decision in the end, but Sam was also thriving at Alighieri. Now that the official invitation had been placed on the table, Sam knew that he could bring up the conversation without sounding cocky (presuming that he would be given the offer would look bad, even if it was his own boyfriend). Unfortunately, it was not one that was going to happen tonight. 

His hands found Lucifer’s shoulders and he gently pulled away from the kiss, pressing their foreheads together. Lucifer smirked devilishly and set his glass down, plopping himself down properly in Sam’s lap and kissing him again. 

“Not tonight, baby,” Sam said regretfully as he came up for air. “I _have_ to get a headstart on the Carter case. I can’t go to trial unprepared,” he explained. Lucifer looked at the time and frowned. 

“It’s too late for that. You can work on it tomorrow.” 

“Trust me, I’m going to be working on it tomorrow. But I need to go ahead and get some stuff done tonight too,” Sam murmured, running a hand through Lucifer’s blonde locks. He noticed Lucifer’s half-chub at that moment and frowned, feeling guilty. “Here, I can get you off before I-” 

Lucifer frowned, batting Sam’s hands away and kissing his forehead before getting up. 

“Hey, I can take care of myself when it’s necessary. And it’s honestly not, I’m fine. Go into the study and get some shit done, just promise that you’ll go to sleep tonight.” 

“I promise. I love you.” 

“Mm, I know,” Lucifer responded before quickly walking away, heading to their room and loosening his tie. 

“You’re a little shit!” Sam called down the hallway with a laugh, getting up and grabbing his bag, heading to the study. After moving in, renovations had been made to their in-home office in order to accommodate them both. Lucifer’s large desk had been moved from the middle of the room to the right side, a matching one having been put in on the left side. A bookshelf ran the entire length of the wall, coming up as high as the baseboard on the large window, and the light fixtures had been switched out for something that would accommodate the double sided room better than the large light in the middle. Sam honestly prefered the natural light from the window but for occasions like these, the new lights were necessary. He turned on the overhead light on his side and began to fish out the documents once more. 

\-- 

Perhaps Lucifer should’ve been more precise with the promise-making because when he woke up around six am with a desperate need to piss, he found the other side of the bed empty and cold. He growled, making his way through the motions in the bathroom before stomping down the hall to the office, fully prepared to fuss at his man for staying up all night working on that case. Lucifer wasn’t a morning person in the slightest so between that and a broken promise, he was a little ball of fire. 

...A little ball of fire that immediately got put out when he found Sam asleep, hunched over his desk and drooling onto his arm. He winced, knowing that Sam was going to regret that sleeping position, and trudged over to him. Gently pushing the hair back out of his face, he pressed a kiss to Sam’s forehead. 

“Baby, come get in bed,” he murmured softly, shaking him a bit. Sam made a noise, sitting up and wiping his mouth. 

“Just a few more minutes,” Sam mumbled before his eyes had even opened. 

“You were sleeping at your desk. No, come and get in bed, now,” Lucifer said, helping him get to his feet and ushering the man back into the bedroom. Sam was already half-asleep once more when he hit the bed and Lucifer sighed, stripping the man down to his underwear and pulling the blankets over him. “Goodnight, handsome,” he mumbled, pressing a kiss to the man’s forehead before curling up to him. 

\-- 

Lucifer saw very little of Sam that weekend. The younger man was back up before Lucifer was that Saturday morning and had already closed himself off in his own little world by the time Lucifer was feeling like a proper human again. Sam had met with Gabriel for dinner that night to discuss the case and again for lunch on Sunday, leaving Lucifer alone at Sunday brunch with Castiel and Dean. He waved it off, understanding the frustrating position that Gabriel had put Sam in. Despite this, he could help but feel a little empty when he crawled into bed alone for the third night in a row. 

When the alarm sounded the next morning, Lucifer groaned at his lover for him to turn it off. When it didn’t happen, he peeked his eyes open, finding himself alone. He sighed, turning the alarm off and reaching over to Sam’s side, feeling it still warm underneath his hand. At least Sam had come to bed at some point. 

* * *

“Mr. Winchester,” Lucifer called out, going into the intern office. Sam looked up, seeing first Jessica’s alarmed face before meeting Lucifer’s eyes. 

“Yes Sir?” 

“Someone from Sandover will be sending over all of their information. You’ll be running point with them, so I want you to get yourself well-acquainted and then arrange a meeting with their CEO, make him nice and comfortable. He needs to know that he’s in good hands here at Alighieri - try a nice dinner, maybe work on your golf game a bit,” Lucifer explained, feeling slightly guilty as he saw the brief look of panic cross Sam’s face. His boyfriend had just wrapped up a week in court and come back to a desk piled high. Lucifer would’ve tried to delegate the duty to someone else but since Sam had such a vital part in getting the contract, he knew that the higher-ups at the corporation would appreciate having someone they recognized to be the one involved. Additionally, because Sam had already been extended the offer to stay at the firm long-term, he was the safest bet for keeping the Sandover transition smooth and consistent. 

Sam took a look at the stack of files on the corner of his desk, Lucifer recognizing it as his to-do pile. He wanted to sympathize, to at least apologize for adding on this extra workload, but he knew that he couldn’t. He couldn’t appear as if he was offering any sort of favoritism to Sam. 

“Yes Sir. I’ll get right on that,” Sam confirmed with a nod. Lucifer smiled, giving him a short nod back. 

“Thank you. I’ll check in on that in a few days, yes?” He confirmed, heading for the door. “Keep up the good work, everybody!” he called out to the other interns in the room. 

As soon as the door shut behind him, Jessica peeked over at Sam once more, raising an eyebrow. ‘Mr. Winchester?’ she mouthed, a look of sympathy on her face. Sam waved her off, shrugging. ‘It’s all good,’ he mouthed back, not wanting to get into the details of his and Lucifer’s work agreement while the others were still in the room. She gave him a look full of pity as she turned back around, getting back to work. 

* * *

When Meg alerted Lucifer of the rumors that were being spread around the watercooler, it got his blood boiling. As applications for the next round of interns were beginning to be sorted through, the topic of who was going to be invited to stay was becoming a big one. 

And apparently, the consensus was that his very own Sam Winchester would be the _only_ one given a job offer. Which, in fact, wasn’t true. 

Granted, Sam had been offered the job, but none of them knew it. Who he asked to stay wasn’t public knowledge and he knew that Sam was smart enough not to say anything about it until contracts were signed. Afterall, he had only been offered it because he was indeed, the right man for it. He was damn good at what he did, otherwise, he’d have never considered extending an offer. Lucifer would never jeopardize his livelihood for a romantic endeavor if it came down to it - and it wouldn’t, because he would never be with someone who wouldn’t be able to understand that. 

But in opposition to their assumptions, he had already made up his mind that Jessica Moore would also be invited to join the firm with a full-time position. But despite his frustration regarding the situation, it got him paranoid about whether he had been too easy on Sam in the workplace. Was his preference evident even when he was trying his best to stay professional? 

* * *

Every single intern had tuned out of the meeting that Lucifer was currently holding. He had been talking solely to the partners of the firm about things that had nothing to do with the interns. Two of them had been drawing for the past ten minutes while Sam and Jessica were fighting sleep, their eyes slowly drifting closed and then popping open in a panic. They’d write a bulletpoint or two before repeating the process. 

“Mr. Winchester, am I boring you?” Lucifer asked, raising an eyebrow. Sam jerked up nice and straight in his chair and Lucifer knew that the tips of his ears were bright red under all that hair. 

“Uh, no Sir.” 

“Then try to look a bit more alert, yes? Do whatever you want on your own time. When I’m speaking, it’s _my_ time,” he bit, before going straight back into the topic of conversation from before. Everybody kept stealing looks at Sam though, curiosity flowing through them. The partners especially were interested, as this was the way that they were used to Lucifer treating interns. He had been oddly kind to this year’s group, not just Sam. 

And it truly hadn’t been fair - Sam wasn’t the only one not paying attention. So Lucifer knew he deserved the dirty look that Sam shot him as he was filing out of the conference room. And when he went to go get Sam at the end of the day, he didn’t fight with the man when he said he would be staying to get work done. He knew he had embarrassed him and he was going to let him have his space. 

* * *

“Mr. Winchester, have you met with Sandover’s CEO yet?” 

“I planned on reaching out as soon as I got completely caught up. I’ve gone through maybe half of their files so far.” 

“And what’s been taking so long?” 

“We’ve already gotten the contract and I’ve been busy. I’ve worked three different trials since we got the contract.” 

“And you’ll lose it if he doesn’t-” 

“I’m not going to lose it,” Sam hissed in response, earning himself a surprised look. Sam didn’t talk to Lucifer like that, ever. But fuck, he was no saint. His patience only lasted for so long. “If you do not think that I am capable of doing my job, then by all means, assign Sandover to someone else.” 

“It’s not that I don’t think you’re capable, I-” 

“Then let me do my job.” 

\-- 

And _that_ is when their home life stopped being so peachy. It wasn’t so much that they were fighting, it was more along the lines of they stopped trying. They stopping pulling one another away from casework long enough to eat dinner. When Lucifer poured himself a drink, he didn’t automatically make one for Sam. When Sam needed a shower, he didn’t invite Lucifer to join him. When Lucifer had Lily come and pick up his dry cleaning, he didn’t bother putting Sam’s along with it. 

The changes were small, just passive aggressive enough that it could be denied or excused if confronted with the truth of their actions. It was subtle enough that they could keep pretending like it actually wasn’t happening. 

But it was. Because contrary to the beginning of their relationship, _Lucifer_ was allowing himself to be influenced by other people and Sam was sick and tired of it.


	12. Six Feet Under

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's pretty damn short but it has to be for the full effect, you know? Next few chapters are already ready so it won't be too long of a wait. 
> 
> Enjoy! xxx

“Look, Meg, I need to talk to him,” Sam huffed, growing tired of her little games within thirty seconds. 

“Yeah and I told you that he said no interruptions unless family calls.” 

“It’s _me_.” 

“And last time I checked, there isn’t a ring on your big ole’ finger, now is there?” She asked with a smirk and Sam growled. 

“No, but I’m his fucking live-in boyfriend, which must count for something.” 

“Last I heard, you’re not his boyfriend when you’re in this building.” Her voice almost a sing-song, obviously amused. 

“Just tell him that I am requesting to come in.” 

“No.” 

Sam saw red as he reached over her desk, saying fuck it to any degree of politeness as he pressed the button himself. 

“It’s Sam. Heads up, I’m coming in. Let Meg know that’s okay,” he muttered into the speaker. 

“Mr. Winchester, I specifically-” 

“I’m coming in.” 

And he did. He threw open the office door, locking it behind him before looking at Lucifer. He was seated behind his desk, hands poised over his laptop with a file beside him. Giving Sam an agitated look, he removed his reading glasses and set them down in front of him. 

“What’s wrong?” Lucifer asked, crossing his arms in front of his chest. 

“Everything,” Sam muttered as he made his way closer, refusing to sit in the chair facing him. He didn't care to level the playing field. 

“A little more specific, yeah?” 

“I need a boyfriend moment.” That got Lucifer’s attention. Since the establishment of the 'boyfriend moment' it had only been used once and that was by Lucifer, who had been a bit under the weather and feeling pitiful. Sam hadn't used it, finding that there weren't many things that couldn't wait until five o'clock but that he was a lot more comfortable knowing that the option was there. Having an out from their office lives made it a lot easier, even if he never used it. 

“What’s wrong, Sam?” Lucifer repeated, a bit gentler this time as he uncrossed his arms, taking down the barrier between them. 

“You. Us. This. Everything,” Sam claimed, running his hands through his long locks as he tried to gather his thoughts. In his frustration, he hadn’t even thought of forming a proper argument. “You’re treating me like shit, Lucifer,” he finally said, looking over at the man. 

“Excuse me? Sam, I-” 

“No. Don’t pull that with me. I’m right. You’ve been so damn caught up in making sure that it doesn’t look like I’m getting too much attention that you’ve stopped giving me any attention at all. Scratch that, you’re trying to drown me in work so there’s no chance that I get attention,” Sam ranted, leaning against Lucifer’s desk. “You’re not treating me like one of the interns, you’re acting like a slavedriver.” 

Lucifer didn’t take accusations very well and Sam knew it. Whatever you pitted against him could be completely true and Lucifer would still get offended - which he did this time, without surprise. The older man got to his feet, not appreciating the height imbalance if they were fighting. His growing anger was obvious in his facial expression. 

“I have treated you like a goddamn intern that still doesn’t know everything, Sam. You may be good but _I_ am the _best_." There was no such thing as modesty when it came to Lucifer Alighieri - he was good and he knew it. "And if you feel like you have nothing to learn from being here, that’s a problem with _you_ , not me.” 

“That’s not what I’m saying. I wouldn’t give a damn if you were just treating me like you treat Jessica or Ben. That’s fine with me. I don’t need the special treatment from before. But I do need you to get off my back.” 

“I’m not-” 

“Lucifer, look. When we first got together, I was concerned about everybody else’s opinions. And you nipped that in the bud. You told me that you wanted to know where our relationship was going to go but if I was going to listen to what the rest of the world thought, it was going to run us straight into the ground,” Sam said, growing still as he found Lucifer’s eyes. “I stopped worrying. I went on dates with you and let you take me home and fell in love with you and started a life with you. But you… Lucifer, _you_ are running us into the ground,” his voice was soft now, trying to keep his partner from getting defensive. "It's not just work anymore. All this frustration - being accused of picking favorites and figuring out how to disprove it and my frustration at the way you choose to handle it - is being carried into our home life. You can't possibly say that it's not." 

Lucifer's tense form began to calm slightly as Sam tried the new approach, no longer yelling but instead, almost as if he were on the verge of tears. He stayed quiet for a long time before finally sighing, rubbing the back of his neck. 

“Sam, can we just discuss this tonight, at home? We’ll actually talk tonight, after dinner.” 

Sam wasn't sure, but he just felt that there was something off in the way that Lucifer said it. His body became rigid, the air immediately thick with tension as Lucifer's eyes immediately tried to calculate where he had gone wrong. 

“You do know that I haven’t been home in two nights, right? That I’ve been sleeping and showering here?” Sam asked, doing his best to keep a tremble out of his voice. The look on Lucifer’s face told him what he needed to know and Sam's stomach dropped as he took a few steps back, trying to reel in his thoughts. “Hell, forget hitting the ground. We’re already six feet under, aren’t we?” He muttered, biting his lower lip for a moment before shaking his head and walking out. 

\-- 

And that’s how Sam found himself in front of Dean and Cas’ door, duffel bag in hand. He had collected his essentials and left the house, not sure what to do next. Dean was the obvious choice, but considering he had just moved into Castiel’s condo, it made him nervous. They had been a little rushed into moving in together - problems with his and Dean’s previous landlord started popping up and Castiel had insisted that Dean just go ahead and move-in instead of trying to start the dreaded apartment search all over again. The condo was paid for and Castiel insisted that it was too big for one person anyways. And while Dean had good reports, assuring Sam that they actually worked really well together, he knew that the first few weeks of living with someone new were fragile. 

But in the end, Dean was still all that Sam had. So he knocked nervously and moments later, the surgeon answered the door, clad in scrubs that were such a bright shade of neon pink that it hurt his eyes. Castiel tilted his head at him, taking in the sight - Sam's eyes were bloodshot and his cheeks were tear-stained... and he had a bag. Oh. Castiel bit his lip, looking at him sadly before stepping back and letting Sam in without a word. 

“Dean? It’s for you!” He called out, giving Sam a quick hug. They listened as Dean trampled down the stairs without an ounce of grace. He turned the corner, spotting Sam and grinning until he had a moment to take a better look at him. His facial expression changed within seconds as he flung his arms around Sam, pulling his baby brother into his embrace easily, despite his larger size. 

“I’m going to kill him,” Dean hissed. 

\-- 

The blowup had never necessarily happened. The words ‘break-up’ or ‘over’ never came up and certainly neither did ‘move-out.’ But when Lucifer got home, Sam’s duffel was gone, along with his hygiene stuff and a few days worth of work clothing. There was an eerie silence as he walked around the large house, finding it hard to breathe. He forced himself to take a shower and pour a drink before he got out his phone. 

**[To: Sammy]  
Just tell me you’re safe and I’ll leave you alone. LA **

"Did that bastard just text you? Give me your phone," Dean growled, seeing the look on Sam's face when he unlocked his phone. Sam didn't hand it over though, merely gripping it to his chest. 

"He just wants to know if I'm safe." 

"He doesn't deserve to get to know that." 

"Dean, if we were in the same situation, we'd want to know the exact same thing. He isn't asking to talk or for him to come home, he's merely asked for a check-in. It's hardly an inconvenience," Castiel pointed out, nodding to Sam. "Go ahead, tell him you're with us." 

_I’m safe, Lucifer. I’m with Dean and Castiel. SW_

They all watched the screen as it signaled that Lucifer was typing almost immediately. When the three-worded message popped up, Dean was quick to confiscated the device, pocketing it as his baby brother began to cry once more. 

**I love you. LA**

_[no reply]_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry. You can yell at me, I can take it. xxx


	13. Miscommunication

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First off, I expected that this would be up sooner but then I had new ideas so it took a bit longer. Second, I'm back to uni in twelve hours - so if uploads suddenly take a bit longer, that's why! 
> 
> This series of vignettes take place over the course of ~3 weeks, just in case that isn't clear! 
> 
> Enjoy! xxx

“We don’t talk. It’s been three days, I have seen him in the office a dozen times, and he hasn’t said a word to me,” Sam explained to Dean, messing with the paper on the beer bottle in his hands. He hadn’t taken a sip out of it yet, despite it having been pushed into his grip at least twenty minutes ago. 

“No reason for him to say shit, is there? What’s done is done, now you just gotta finish up your time there.” 

“Just like that? All this time invested into this and he just lets me walk away? There’s no apologies, no attempts at fixing it, just… bye?” 

“You don’t want him to give you some bullshit excuses. All that’s going to do is drag it out. It hurts now but it’ll be for the best. Cold turkey is what you need.” 

“All I _need_ is for him to talk to me.” 

\-- 

“Castiel, he didn’t give me a chance. I let them get the better of me, I fucked up, yeah, but I didn’t even realize exactly how harsh I had been. I could’ve… We could’ve fixed things but he doesn’t want to. He won’t speak to me,” Lucifer droned, downing the rest of his whiskey. 

“Lucifer, if you could pull yourself together, you know where he is. You can talk to him and-” 

“He doesn’t want to hear from me.” 

\-- 

Castiel shut the bathroom light off and crawled into bed, seeking out the warmth radiating from Dean’s body. As they curled up together, Cas found Dean’s hand and interlocked their fingers. 

“How is Sam?” 

“Rough. But he’s a tough kid, he’ll be fine.” 

“...I went to visit Lucifer tonight. Dean, all he wants is the chance-” 

“Can we not talk about them right now? I spent all night listening to Sam cry about him. If I hear one more thing about them tonight, my head will explode.” 

* * *

“I’m going to have to change my degree. He’s going to blacklist me, I know it. I’ll have to get certified to practice in another state if I ever want to practice law after this,” Sam ranted, slamming the door behind him. Dean and Cas both looked up from where they were on the sofa, eyes widening as the tall man began to pace the floor. “I’m going to have to move back to Kansas. Where the hell else am I supposed to go?” 

Dean got up, grabbing Sam’s shoulders and stilling him before shoving him down onto the couch. 

“Sam, you aren’t going anywhere if you don’t want to. We came out to California for a reason and there is no way in hell that I will let you run back home before you’re ready. What are you going on about?” 

“He hates me. He hates me and he has the power to make sure not a single firm in California will hire me. I knew the risks going into this, I did, I was just stupid and put my career on the line for a potential romance and I-” 

“Sam, Lucifer is not vindictive like that. He will not ruin your career as a result of the failure of your romantic endeavors,” Castiel interrupted Sam's rambling, wanting to clear his brother’s name even slightly. “What makes you think that he hates you?” 

“He won’t even look at me, Cas. We can be in the same room and he’ll make eye contact with everyone but me. He’s not assigning me anything either. Everything I have is coming from Mr. Novak or Ms. Bradbury. It’s like he doesn’t want to come near me with a ten foot pole.” 

“Sam, he just wants to give you space. He doesn’t want to push-” Cas started gently before Dean huffed. 

“C’mon. Let’s get some booze in you, yeah? It’s just part of breaking up, you gotta face the music.” 

* * *

_“Do you know what time means to a lawyer, Sammy?” Surprisingly, when Sam looked up into Lucifer’s eyes, he saw the man wasn’t trying to be a smartass. So he nodded, sitting up against the pillows and mimicking Lucifer’s position to look him in the eyes._

_“‘Course I do, Luce.”_

_“I used to think of time as money, like any lawyer. It’s my job. And then you came along and it felt like time had stopped and that I was running out of time all in one breath.”_

_Sam leaned forward, pressing a chaste kiss to Lucifer’s lips._

_“We have all the time in the world, Lucifer,” Sam promised. “We have the rest of our lives. We aren’t running out of time, the timer has only just started.”_

_Lucifer grinned, pulling Sam in tight. Sam curled up around him, placing his face in the crook of Lucifer’s neck._

_“You aren’t supposed to be the sappy one right now, that’s my job,” he complained and Sam lifted his head with a raised eyebrow._

_“Why are you supposed to be sappy?”_

_“Because I got you a gift and in the movies, they always say sappy shit before they give their partner a present,” Lucifer admitted, causing Sam to let go of him in order to throw his head back, laughing loudly. Normally, Lucifer would be embarrassed and then offended, but he knew that Sam wasn’t laughing **at** him. Sam never did. _

_“What’s so funny, Winchester?”_

_“You, taking relationship advice from movies. You don’t have to make it a big to-do.”_

_Lucifer smiled, leaning over to reach into his nightstand drawer. He pulled out a green box with a tiny gold crown on it, handing it over to Sam. He caught the suspicious look but considering Sam didn’t really know luxury brands, he didn’t start freaking out yet. He opened it, revealing a white gold watch with a blue face, diamonds in place for ten of the number spots while the other two were taken by the slot for the date and an additional crown. Sam picked it up as if it were a bomb, inspecting it with wide eyes before looking up at his boyfriend._

_“You said your watch broke.”_

_“So you… you replaced it with a Rolex?” Sam asked carefully, his tone still calm. Lucifer nodded, a small smile on his lips._

_“That’s why I said I had a present instead of ‘I got you a new watch.’”_

_Sam gave him an unamused look but it didn’t last long, as his eyes soon traveled back down to the watch in his hands._

_“Aren’t you going to put it on me?” He finally asked with a small smirk._

_“You aren’t going to yell?”_

_“We promised to be more understanding about this kind of thing. I’m holding up my end of the promise. Just never tell me how much you spent on this,” Sam explained, holding out the watch with one hand and holding his other wrist up, wanting Lucifer to clasp it for him._

_“Did you read the engraving?” Lucifer asked, pausing after he had taken it into his hand. Sam shook his head and Lucifer flipped it over, revealing the words in a beautiful script: **To My Last First Kiss: I Love You.** _

_Sam stared at it for a long moment before taking it back, placing it back into the velvet interior of the green box. Lucifer’s stomach flipped as he watched Sam move it to the nightstand and he was prepared to apologize when Sam’s hands grabbed his face and lips met his in a hungry kiss._

_Good surprise, then. Good surprise._

“Sam, you’re just torturing yourself with the damn thing. If I were you, I’d have thrown it into the Pacific Ocean by now,” Dean called out from the kitchen table, able to see into the living room where Sam was laying on the sofa, holding the watch in his hands. 

“But it’s not you, Dean. If he wants to get rid of the watch, he’ll do it on his time, not yours,” Castiel chastised, having walked through the front door seconds before Dean yelled out. Dean rolled his eyes, huffing as Castiel sent him a look on his way to the shower. 

Both of them noticed that the watch was back on Sam’s wrist the next morning, but neither said a word. 

* * *

**[To: Sammy]  
** **hope youre happy with my brother la**  
**you dont deserve a fuckup like me anyways la**  
**never wanted to fall in love with you la**  


_Please stop. SW_

**thought you were pretty. wanted you but didnt mean to fall in love. that was the last thing i wanted la**

_Don’t do this to me, Lucifer. SW_

**shitty people arent supposed to get love. i dont get to be in love and you made me forget that la**  
**fuck you la**  
**was so good at keeping people out until you came along la**  
**you ruined it la**  
**ruined me la**  
**with the damn hair and your pretty face and puppy dog eyes and bright ideas fuck you la**  


_Goodnight, Lucifer. SW_

Castiel had been on-call at the hospital that night and had left around 10pm for an emergency surgery. It had been a brutal one and the six year old was barely hanging on by a thread by the time he left. It was out of his hands at this point, whether she would survive or not. Returning home four hours later, he was exhausted. The only thing on his mind was crawling into bed with Dean and passing out - he had thought ahead and showered before leaving the hospital so he could just collapse. 

On his way to the bedroom, he noticed a soft glow coming from under the door of the guest room. It was just soft enough to be the bedside lamp and Cas was curious as to why the other was still awake. He was going to keep going though, not actually caring about how late the grown man cared to stay up. But then he heard the quiet sobs coming from behind the door and he sighed, knocking gently. 

“Sam? It’s Castiel. Can I come in?” He called quietly, not wanting to risk waking Dean. After an affirmative from Sam, he opened the door and slipped in, heading over to the crying young man. “Is it Luci again?” He asked carefully, watching as Sam nodded and thrust out his phone. Castiel scanned over the text messages, pinching the bridge of his nose. He didn’t want to know how much alcohol Lucifer had consumed since Sam left. He had no clue how his brother was even functioning - if he was this drunk on a weeknight, he couldn’t imagine he was very productive during the day. 

Castiel shut off Sam’s phone to prevent him from reading anymore messages that Lucifer may decide to send before kicking off his shoes and getting into the bed beside Sam. He propped himself up against the pillows and pulled Sam in close, stroking his hair. There was nothing romantic about the embrace; if anything, Castiel felt like he was comforting his own younger brother. 

He stayed quiet for a bit, just letting Sam cry it out. After a while, he finally sighed and opened his mouth. 

“Sam, I know it feels like nothing is ever going to be okay again, but this is just a bump. Look, Lucifer… all he wants is to be able to ta-” Castiel started and got interrupted by Sam. 

“Can we just not talk about him? Please? I can’t… Not now.” 

Castiel sighed, silently agreeing and gently rocking Sam back and forth until he cried himself to sleep. Once he was sure that the giant was asleep, he carefully slid out of the bed, turned the lamp off, and retreated to his own bedroom. The sight of Dean peacefully sleeping tugged at something inside of him and he finally smiled, crawling into the bed. Dean grunted and reached out, pulling Castiel in close to spoon him and Cas held back a laugh, not wanting to actually wake him. Sam and Lucifer may refuse to listen to him but at least he had Dean. 

* * *

Castiel moved about Lucifer’s kitchen, searching first for pots and pans and then for necessary ingredients. Despite knowing that his older brother was more than capable of fixing his own meals, he also had noticed that he had lost a few pounds already. He didn’t want to think about what vices the man was using to cope and figured the least he could do was make sure he got a healthy serving of protein and vegetables. 

“Cassie, you don’t have to cook,” Lucifer mumbled from the sofa, already out of his suit and into sweatpants and a t-shirt that was suspiciously large. 

“No, but I have to make sure you get fed.” 

“I’m a big boy.” 

“Then act like it,” Cas said sharply, effectively shutting Lucifer up. For a moment, at least. 

“I ordered a Postmates delivery,” he called out. “You can’t cook worth shit. I doubt Dean’s made a decent woman out of you yet and taught you how to run a house.” Lucifer was bitter and miserable and it was the only thing that kept Castiel from hitting him as he came back into the living room, slightly relieved that he didn’t have to brave cooking a proper dinner by himself. Dean was the one who cooked back home, admittedly. 

“What did you order?” 

Lucifer tossed his phone over and Castiel unlocked it, pointedly ignoring his phone wallpaper. It was a photo he had taken the day they went hiking: both men clad in swimming trunks while Lucifer sat on Sam’s shoulders after a successful game of chicken. He didn’t think it was doing Lucifer any good to stare at it every time he looked at his phone but considering he knew Sam was doing the same thing, he didn’t bother commenting. So he opened the Postmates app, finding Lucifer’s order and groaning loudly. 

“‘Bring me post-breakup food. What that means is up to your discretion, up to $300,’” he read aloud. “Lucifer, you can’t do shit like this. That’s not what this is for.” 

“A lovely girl named Sarah happily took the request, thank you very much.” 

“Lucifer, you already pay someone to do things like this for you. Does the name ‘Lily’ ring a bell?” Castiel asked, pinching the bridge of his nose. Lucifer paused, blinking at him before frowning. 

“Well now it does,” he muttered, grunting as his phone landed on his chest. “So what, Lily gets a break. I don’t care.” 

Lucifer picked up a file from the coffee table, trying to force himself to read it as they waited, while Cas picked up around the house, grumbling the whole time. Lucifer caught mumbles of ‘you hire people to do this too, I don’t understand why it’s such a disaster’ but blatantly ignored it. He hadn’t had the housekeeper come since Sam left, preferring to shut himself off in the privacy of his misery. 

He got up only when the doorbell rang and he greeted a perky college-aged redhead at his door whose arms were laden with bags. 

“I hope you find the items satisfactory, I did my best,” she informed him, giving him a sad smile. “Hopefully it helps with the brunt of it.” They exchanged a few more words but it was clear that Lucifer wasn’t in the mood for a chat and she was leaving soon. He ignored the bags on the floor in favor of pulling up the app to finish out the transaction, tipping her the amount of money that he had placed as a limit as well as what she hadn’t used. 

“Well? Did she get anything that will actually feed you?” Castiel asked from the kitchen doorway and he huffed, picking up the bags and taking them into the kitchen. He first found cheap wine and whiskey, which he appreciated. He was out and all he had left was the kind of alcohol that was meant to be appreciated, not used to drown out memories of a certain giant with long brown hair. 

She had gotten him Chinese food, greasy pizza, some giant cookie-brownie thing, a tub of ice cream, and chocolate. While he almost had enough shame to feel like a sixteen year old with their first heartbreak, he was actually extremely satisfied. Sarah had done him well, given his request. Cas sat down from him across the table as he opened one of the takeout boxes, digging around with his chopsticks. 

“Lucifer?” 

“Hm?” 

“If you could go back in time - knowing what you know, knowing that your relationship would end and you would feel like this - would you still do it? Would you still have kissed him that night and pursued a relationship?” 

Lucifer was quiet for a long time, focusing on eating. Castiel was convinced that he was being ignored and finally put his hands down on the table, pushing himself up into a standing position and gathering his belongings. Right before he went to say goodbye, Lucifer finally looked up at him. 

“I’d do it again a million times.” 

* * *

“Hey Sambino!” Gabriel called out as Sam passed by his office. Sam halted, turning back and poking his head in. 

“Mr. Novak?” 

“Can you take this to the bossman? I need his signature,” he requested, holding out a file with a dangerous glint in his eyes. Sam blanched, gulping harshly. 

“Uh, yes, Sir, I’ll have it taken right up to him,” he said carefully, stepping inside to grab the file. 

“Oh, it’s important information in there. I need to know it’s in good hands. I’ll need you to deliver it.” 

“Mr. Novak, I will have Jessica take it up, you can rest assured that it will get to him and back safely.” The whole office knew that they had broken up. Irregardless of their changes in behavior before it happened, it didn’t prevent the air from growing heavy with the drastic mood change of their boss. Despite this, Gabriel seemed determined to be an ass about it, making it as painful as possible for him. 

“Winchester, you’ve been given a direct order. Please take this file upstairs and bring it back to me when it has been signed.” His voice rang with authority and Sam deflated, taking the file and nodding. 

“Yes, Sir,” he mumbled, making his way to the elevator. Meg seemed more than surprised to see him - he'd been actively avoiding coming up here since the breakup. 

“Darling, I have Mr. Winchester here with some papers that need your pretty little autograph. Can he come in?” She asked Lucifer through the telephone. 

“Send him in.” Lucifer’s voice made his knees weak but he went into the office anyway. When he did, Lucifer looked up at him, standing. “Sam. Hi. I-” 

“I have some papers here from Mr. Novak, Sir. He insisted upon their importance, so if you could just sign them, I can be on my way.” 

Lucifer let no emotion cross his face as took in a deep breath, nodding. Sam had set the tone and he wasn’t going to upset him even more by trying to push it. He merely took the file, flipping through the papers to identify its contents before signing and initialing a few times. 

It hurt Sam to be so formal, to not have a chance. Normally, the confines of this room would’ve been their safe spot in the building, a place where their walls could go down and they would be free to have a moment between them. But now? Now it was a brutal reminder of all that he had lost. 

When Lucifer handed back the file, he sighed, looking at Sam’s face for just a moment. 

“I’ll be out of town this weekend. You will have access to the house to get your things without my interference, if you so wish,” he told him, watching as Sam visibly flinched. He managed a nod though, leaving the room without a word. 

A few minutes later, Sam was slamming the file down onto Gabriel’s desk. 

“Got the signatures you wanted. Happy?” He practically growled. Gabriel frowned, perhaps having expected a different reaction. He opened the folder to see that the papers were signed and he sighed, feeding them into the shredder beside his desk. 

“Nope,” he muttered, dismissing the intern. 

* * *

When Sam came in after a late night in the office, he was greeted with the sight of his brother, fast asleep in Castiel’s arms as he laid out on the sofa. Both men were in boxers and band tees and Cas was watching something quietly on the tv. 

“How long has he been out?” Sam asked, gesturing to Dean. 

“Almost two hours. He had a rough day,” Castiel’s voice was a little louder than a whisper, refusing to disturb the mechanic. Sam smiled, mostly because he knew that Castiel probably hadn’t done so much as stretch out his arm since he realized Dean was asleep. Lucifer was the exact same way. 

“Are you doing alright, Sam?” Castiel’s voice broke him out of his little trance and he realized he had been quiet for a longer amount of time than he thought. He nodded slowly, forcing a smile. 

“Yeah, of course. I’m fine.” Lie. 

“I was thinking - how about we drag Dean out with us on Saturday and go hiking? I think some fresh air would do you good,” Cas said after regarding him for a moment. Sam bit his lip, rubbing his hand across the back of his neck. 

“I can’t. I need to finish my dissertation.” Lie. He had finished it a few days before the fight. “And uh, Lucifer is going to be out of town so he said I could come and get my stuff. Don’t worry, I’ll rent a storage unit. So with that, I should really hunker down on the apartment search.” 

“Sam, you are more than welcome to stay with us as long as you would like. Otherwise that room is just gathering dust. Besides, I know Dean’s happy to have you around more.” 

“I really appreciate everything, Cas, but I can’t keep intruding. You two need to have your privacy and having me lumbering around isn’t the way to start off this chapter of your lives.” 

Castiel merely shrugged gently, a small smile on his lips as he looked down at Dean. 

“You make Dean happy, Sam. And I enjoy your company. So if you aren’t ready to start looking for an apartment, you don’t have to.” 

Sam was quiet, his fingers fiddling with his tie as he worked it loose. How could he say that no, he didn’t want to start looking at apartments because no, he didn’t want to go get his damn stuff from Lucifer’s because then it would be too real? How could he possibly tell Castiel any of that without sounding even more pathetic than he had in the past couple of weeks? 

"Sam, I am sure that Lucifer wouldn’t mind if you waited a little while longer to get your things,” Cas finally said, cautious. When Sam looked up, a weird look on his face, he continued quickly. “You know, if you needed to spend your time on your dissertation. I’m sure he’d understand if maybe next weekend would be a better time,” he offered the excuse, wanting to keep Sam from locking up on him. 

“Yeah, I’m sure he wants my shit out of there as soon as possible, Cas,” Sam muttered in response, an inconsolable look on his face. 

Castiel couldn’t take it anymore. He was trying to be there for both his brother and his friend during this hard time but with both of them refusing to speak to each other, it was driving him insane. While he wanted to provide a certain level of confidentiality for both of them, this was getting to be too much. 

“Sam, look, Lucifer is absolutely-” he started, determined he was actually going to speak up this time when Dean shifted in his arms, blinking his eyes open and looking first at Sam in front of them and then up at his partner. 

“Heya Sammy, how was work?” 

“It was okay, Dean. Why don’t you guys head to bed? You look like you could use it,” Sam offered his brother a small smile and Dean nodded, yawning as he sat up and looked to Cas. 

“Are you ready to go to bed?” He asked sleepily. Castiel glanced from Sam to Dean and sighed, placing his hand on Dean’s cheek. In the end, this was the man who he was supposed to be focused on. He wasn’t meant to be meddling in the affairs of two grown men, despite how much he cared for either one of them. 

“Of course, love. Let’s go to bed.” 

* * *

When Sam got to the office on Friday morning, he noticed a stack of envelopes on his desk. He set his bag and travel mug down before inspecting them. It was the firm’s stationary, with ‘ _To Whom It May Concern, **RE: Samuel Winchester**_ ’ written on the front. Flipping one over, he found the envelope sealed with an Alighieri Law seal. He was still slightly confused as he picked up the sheet of paper beside the letters. In Lucifer’s familiar handwriting, it read: 

_Mr. Winchester,_  
_Here are five signed and sealed letters of recommendation for your future employers. If you require any more, please let me know. I wish you luck in your future endeavors._  
_Lucifer Alighieri_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Petition to rename this chapter: "STOP INTERRUPTING CASTIEL"  
> Anybody agree?


	14. The World Turned Upside Down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So I implore you to please notice the addition of three new tags for the story, as they may be very important regarding whether you choose to read this chapter or not. Namely, the three new tags are gun violence, minor character death, and major character injury. I will put a short synopsis in the end notes that will avoid all unnecessary details in order to still be able to follow along with the rest of the story. 
> 
> And I don't know if I should say enjoy for this one, sooo...  
> xxx

_A tall man with a head full of dark hair and striking eyes paused in front of the towering building, watching as well-dressed men and women bustled in and out, oblivious to the world around them. To them, it was just a normal day - a happy day, in fact. A Friday, meaning that they had finally reached the end of their work week. They smiled and laughed as they passed by him, oblivious to the fact that today was the end of his world as he knew it._

_He made his way inside, going up to the large, main reception desk._

_“Hello, Sir!” A chirpy blonde woman greeted him, leaning forward a bit. “How can I help you today?”_

_“If you could just direct me to Alighieri Law,” he requested and she quickly informed him that the firm occupied the top three floors of the tall building._

_“-and if you can just let me know who exactly you are here to see, I can let you know the right floor!”_

_“Mr. Alighieri, actually.”_

_“Oh! Perfect. Top floor, just take one of the elevators on your right all the way up! Have a nice day, Sir.”_

_When he smiled at her in thanks, her cheeks turned pink and she bashfully looked away as he headed off to the elevators._

Sam stood where he was, holding the five envelopes in complete shock. Lucifer had officially drawn the line in the sand, taking back the job offer that he had extended a while back and sending him off. While his entire body felt numb at first, he quickly began to warm, growing angry. In a moment of blind rage, the next time he came to himself, the elevator doors were opening on the top floor. He stomped over to Meg’s desk, still clinging to the envelopes. She looked at them in his hand, an expression that almost looked like pity crossing her face. In an act of kindness that she had never shown him before, she pressed a button on her phone. 

“Visitor, Lucifer,” she called simply before dropping the connection, not allowing the man a chance to argue with her. She gave Sam a weak smile and gestured to the door behind her. “The King awaits,” she told him quietly, a play on the joke she had made so long ago, when their relationship had just been blossoming. 

Sam gave her a thankful smile, gulping harshly and nodding before letting himself into the office. The door closed shut behind him and he looked at the man behind the desk with a dark gaze. Lucifer could feel Sam’s eyes looking straight into his soul and he fidgeted, breaking Sam’s trance. 

“Do you want to explain what the fuck this is?” Sam demanded, stepping forward and throwing the envelopes down onto Lucifer’s desk. The man picked one up, running his fingertips over it as if he hadn’t been holding onto them, crying over them for days. 

“They are your letters of recommendation. You’re a good lawyer and I made that very clear. I doubt you’ll have any problems getting on wherever you decide to go next,” Lucifer explained calmly, his facial expression unreadable. 

“I thought I had a job lined up already,” Sam bit, his voice accusatory. 

Lucifer’s face was surprised and he tilted his head slightly before biting his lip. 

“I was unaware that you still wished to stay on here.” 

“You haven’t asked!” 

_The elevator doors slid open and he stepped out, looking around at the modern, simplistic design of the office. Passing through a single glass door, he was faced with a woman typing away at a desk. She looked up, her expression unamused until she saw that her guest wasn’t an employee but presumably, a client. The brunette’s face changed into a rather pretty smile, despite the brief look of confusion as she went to pull up the calendar on her computer._

_“Can I help you?”_

_“I’m here to see Lucifer Alighieri,” he said simply._

_“Do you have an appointment?” She asked, looking at the calendar for today and finding, like she thought, it empty until this afternoon._

_“I do not. It’s urgent though,” he explained and before she could answer, they both lifted their heads and looked back at the door of Lucifer’s office when they heard yelling._

“That’s hardly fair, I-” 

“Look, the very least you can do is be a damn man and say this stuff to my face. Getting drunk and telling me that you regret everything? Over a text message? Firing me via letters on my desk? I have invested my time, my energy, my heart and soul into this and you turn around and act like it meant nothing to you!” 

_The secretary turned pink, quickly apologizing for the shouts. He couldn’t decipher the words but it was very clear that there was already an angry client in the room. His lip twitched and he turned back to her, his facial expression changing from his previous calm one into a more agitated one._

_“Ma’am, I need to see Mr. Alighieri immediately. It is of the utmost importance.”_

_“I’m afraid he’s busy at the moment. It really is imperative to make an appointment as Mr. Alighieri is a very busy man. Why don’t we schedule something for Monday? I think I see an empty spot,” she tried to placate him, finding his demeanor change unsettling. Preferring to be safe rather than sorry, she casually pressed a button on the phone, alerting security that they were needed._

_“I can’t do Monday,” the man said and she looked up from the computer at the change in his tone of voice, finding herself face-to-face with a silver gun. Her breath caught, her eyes widening, and he steeled himself. “I need to see him, now,” he repeated._

_“Sir, this isn’t… We can talk this out. I’m sure there’s a rational way to handle your disputes. I-” she started, standing now as a last ditch effort to keep him from going into Lucifer’s office._

_“I don’t want to hurt you,” he whispered and she took a deep breath._

_“You don’t have to. Just put the gun down. Nobody has to get hurt.”_

_“He has to die.”_

_“Nobody has to die, Sir. Nobody. This can be handled without anybody getting hurt,” she said. Her eyes glanced towards the emergency button, the one that would alert not only security, but the police. He immediately noticed, following her gaze. His hand began to tremble._

_“Don’t make me hurt you,” he warned. The woman stared him down for a long moment before lunging towards the button, pressing it at the same time his gun went off, a bullet going straight through her neck._

Sam and Lucifer’s heads jerked up as they heard a gunshot ring out in the next room, bringing their argument to a freeze. As if their hearts weren’t already racing from their argument, they practically jumped out of their chests at the sound. They were still staring at the door like deer in the headlights when it opened, a man with black hair and sharp facial features coming through with a pistol in his shaking hand. 

The gun shifted back and forth from Sam to Lucifer for a moment before landing on Sam. 

“You… You should go,” the man said uneasily. 

“Can’t we talk this out?” Sam asked in response, trying to hide how badly he was trembling. Lucifer had stepped closer to him and Sam motioned for him to be still. “C-can you tell me what this is about?” 

“This is between me and him,” the man said, a wild look in his eyes as he used the gun to gesture to Lucifer. “You don’t have to be involved. I’m not stupid, I know the cops are on their way. I don’t expect to leave here on my own free will. So you can leave. No more innocent people need to get hurt.” 

Sam gulped, looking at Lucifer, who gave him a look that very clearly said _get the hell out_. He shook his head, turning back to the man with the gun. “I… I’m Sam. My name is Sam Winchester. What’s yours?” He tried. The man looked at him skeptically before answering. 

“Michael,” he hissed. 

“Michael… Okay. Can you uh, tell me why you’re here?” 

“Look, Sam, you need to leave!” The man shouted, his hand trembling even more. “Walk out of here right now. Find a different attorney to take your case, okay? He is not the kind of man you want to take your case.” Michael was now aiming the gun at Lucifer, who was still standing very still. Sam risked a glance at him and Lucifer’s eyes were begging him to go along with what the man in front of them was claiming. Sam gulped, steeling up his nerve before speaking again. 

“I’m not a client, Michael. I work here,” he said carefully. It was clear that he threw the man off, as his wild eyes began to calculate once more, trying to figure out a way to salvage the situation. 

“I could hear you yelling. You already know that he’s a scumbag, I bet you hate him just as much as I do. So leave. I don’t want to hurt you, Sam. Please… leave,” Michael pleaded with him while Lucifer turned towards him cautiously. 

“Sam, he’s right. Leave. _Now_ ,” Lucifer hissed. Sam caught his eyes and slowly shook his head. 

“I don’t hate him, Michael,” Sam said quietly, looking directly at Lucifer instead of the man wielding a weapon. “He’s my significant other and I-” Sam paused, taking a deep breath. “-And I love him. I am not leaving,” he added firmly before turning back to the unstable man. 

“You’re lying!” Michael accused. “I-I heard you yelling at him.” 

“You’re right, I was yelling. I was upset. But that doesn’t make me a liar,” Sam explained, reaching out and grabbing onto Lucifer’s hand. “He is my life, Michael, and I’m not about to just walk out of here while you’re pointing a gun at him. So why don’t you tell me what this is about?” 

“He killed my father,” Michael hissed, glaring at Lucifer, whose eyes widened as a confused look crossed his features. 

“I never killed-” 

“My name is Michael Shurley, Lucifer. Do you-” the rest of his sentence wasn’t necessary. A look of recognition crossed his face as soon as the word _Shurley_ came out and even Sam recognized the name. He had done a case study on the Shurley trial, the prosecution spearheaded by Lucifer Alighieri himself. Twelve bodies, all females under the age of sixteen - it had made international headlines. Chuck Shurley never had a chance. It was a few years back but if Sam remembered correctly, there had been word that a judge had denied Chuck Shurley’s final appeal and his execution date was right around the corner. 

Lucifer shook his head rapidly, trying to clear his name. 

“I did not kill your dad, Michael. I am just a lawyer, I’m not-” Lucifer defended carefully. 

“It is your fault that he was sentenced to death!” Michael screamed, causing both lawyers to flinch. “They executed him today. And somebody has to pay!” 

Sam, eyes widening with understanding of what had triggered this, held a hand out to the man in a placating gesture. 

“Hey, hey, can I explain something to you? We uh.. As lawyers, we don’t.. We don’t pick if someone gets the death penalty, Michael. That part isn’t our job. We don’t do that part. We aren’t even in the room when that’s decided,” he said, his voice shaking. “What happened to your dad… that isn’t Lucifer’s fault. You are blaming the wrong man,” he explained. 

It wasn’t what Michael wanted to hear. The look in his eyes grew even more manic as he shook his head, turning the gun back on Sam. 

“You’re lying! You’re a liar, just like he is!” He yelled. “You-” 

“Hey! Focus on me, I’m the one you’re pissed at!” Lucifer shouted, getting Michael’s attention safely away from Sam and yanking his hand out of Sam’s grip in the meantime. Like a man with a death wish (or maybe merely a wish to protect the man he loved), he continued to talk once the barrel of the gun was facing him once more. “I’m the one who messed up your life, remember? You keep that thing focused on me. Your dad is dead because of _me_ , Michael.” 

Michael almost fell for it. But he began to pick up on what Lucifer was doing and snarled, turning the gun back on Sam. 

“Maybe I should make you hurt as badly as you hurt me,” he whispered, the tremble in his hand finally slowing to a stop as he held the gun at Sam’s heart. Sam’s breath audibly picked up and the noise that Lucifer let out was an unconscious, fearful whine. 

“Please leave him out of this,” Lucifer begged quietly, shaking his head. “He didn’t do anything to deserve this.” 

“I’ll make you feel my pain. Maybe then you’ll understand, you lying bastard,” Michael hissed. The room was silent for a moment, nothing but the sound of heavy breathing from all three filling the space until Lucifer opened his mouth again. 

“Your father was a sick piece of shit,” Lucifer hissed. Sam gave himself whiplash turning to look at his ex-boyfriend, his eyes practically popping out of his head. 

“Lucifer-” Sam tried, but Lucifer kept talking over him. 

“He killed those little girls and you know it. He was as guilty as the day is long. He deserved to die,” Lucifer added, his voice steely. 

“Shut up,” Michael cried out, turning the gun on him. “Don’t you say that, shut up.” 

“If you ask me, he got off easy. If anything-” 

“Stop it!” 

“-a humane death was the last thing he should’ve been granted. If it was up to me-” 

“Shut up!” 

“-then he would’ve died a long, slow, painful-” 

Sam saw it in Michael’s eyes. Lucifer had pulled him to the edge with his words and he was done screaming at him to stop. In the exact moment that he saw the muscle in Michael’s right hand twitch, Sam screamed. 

“No!” He jumped to shield Lucifer at the same time that the gunshot rang out. 

The next few minutes were a blur. Lucifer knew that the room filled with smoke and yelling by SWAT officials but he could pay them no mind. There was a litany of _Sam, Sam, Sam_ running through his head. _Sam_ \- jumping in front of him. _Sam_ \- his body jerking in midair before falling to the ground. _Sam_ \- the cream dress shirt under his suit jacket quickly staining red. The sound that escaped Lucifer’s lips was barely human as he fell to his knees, his hands rushing to press over the hole that now punctured through the man in front of him. Sam’s eyes were wide as he stared up at Lucifer, gasping and trying to speak. 

“I’m right here, Sam. I’m right here, I’ve got you, you’re going to be okay. Just keep looking at me,” he urged. Blood was still pouring out of him and Lucifer pushed down harder, making Sam cry out as blood pooled out around Lucifer’s fingers. “I’m sorry, I have to stop the bleeding, Sammy. You’re okay,” he whispered, watching as Sam’s eyes fluttered shut. 

“Sam? Sam, open your eyes… You gotta keep looking at me, Sam, open your eyes… Sam! Don’t you die on me, don’t you fucking dare!” Lucifer began to scream. “Look at me, baby. Open your eyes and look at me. I’m right here, I’ve got you… I love you, Sam, please, you can’t do this to me. You can’t... Please, Sam, look at me. Just open your eyes… You fucking idiot, why would you be so _stupid_? Come on, open your eyes goddammit!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In the original outline of this story, it purposely ended right here because I am sadistic. You have my best friend (who has no idea what samifer is) to thank for changing my mind. 
> 
> \- 
> 
> Short synopsis:  
> Sam fights with Lucifer in his office regarding the letters of recommendation and therefore, what Sam believes to be an unspoken revocation of his job offer. While they are fighting, a man named Michael Shurley tries to get Meg to allow him into the office to see Lucifer - when she refuses, she is shot and killed. Michael gives Sam every opportunity to leave as he is only here for revenge because Lucifer was the one to get his father, Chuck Shurley, put on Death Row and his execution was today. Sam refuses to leave, claiming Lucifer as his partner and promising that he loves him and will not just walk out. Michael decides that Sam will be his target in order to make Lucifer feel the same kind of pain that he does and Lucifer draws his attention back by provoking him with awful comments about Chuck Shurley.  
> Michael goes to shoot Luce and Sam, being the self-sacrificing galoot that he is, jumps in front of Lucifer and takes the bullet instead.


	15. Even As The Walls Come Tumbling Down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mentions of blood, if anyone is squeamish about that. 
> 
> Otherwise, share some love for our boys. They need it. 
> 
> Enjoy! xxx

The next thing that Lucifer clearly registered in the hustle and bustle that came next was Castiel’s voice yelling through his phone. He must’ve answered it at some point, bringing it to his ear and blanking out again. He blinked, looking around, finding himself in the back of a screaming ambulance with an unresponsive Sam and frantic paramedics. He released an animalistic cry, reaching forward and getting shoved back by the EMTs. 

“Lucifer? Lucifer, answer me!” Castiel’s voice rang loud and clear through the phone against his ear now and Lucifer wasn’t sure how long his brother had been speaking. 

“C-cas?” He managed, his voice hoarse from the screaming from before. 

“Oh thank God,” Cas muttered, breathing a sigh of relief. “I can’t believe… The reports of a shooting at the firm came through and they said there were casualties and then you.. You weren’t answering and-” 

“It’s Sam,” Lucifer said flatly, cutting him off. The line went quiet for a minute before Castiel found words again. 

“What do you mean, it’s Sam? Is he..” Castiel couldn’t bring himself to say the word dead. 

“N-no. We’re in the ambulance. He’s… he jumped in front of me. The stupid bastard jumped in front of me,” he began, breaking down once more. 

“Lucifer… Lucifer, come back to me. Come back… **Lucifer**!” Castiel was shouting into the phone again while Lucifer tried to remember what it meant to breathe. 

“We’re on our way in,” he whispered. “You have to make sure… you have to make sure they save him, Cas,” Lucifer managed. 

“I’ll make sure they have the OR and the surgeons prepped and ready, Lu. They’re going to fix him. They’ll get him… They will but you have to pull it together. Sam’s going to need you and you have **got** to pull it together,” Castiel said harshly. Playing nice wasn’t going to get him anywhere in this state, Lucifer would have to be pushed into doing what was necessary. 

“I don’t know what to do, Castiel,” Lucifer whimpered, looking at the man in front of him. Blood had spilled off of the gurney and into the floor of the ambulance, leaking from the man as if he had an infinite supply. 

“His family, Lucifer. Get them here. No matter what it takes, get them here,” Castiel ordered, supplying Lucifer with a very clear mission before telling him that he was going to get things together on his side at the hospital. 

\-- 

Lucifer’s hands trembled as he selected Dean’s name in his phone, not even paying attention to the fact that his own hands were bright red. The phone rang a few times before going to voicemail and Lucifer cried out, immediately redialing. When Dean still hadn’t answered five tries later, he knew he had to move on. 

Thankful that he had exchanged numbers with Sam’s family back at Christmas, he clicked on a specific cell number and tried to pull himself together while it rang. 

“Hello?” A gruff voice finally answered and Lucifer let out another noise. 

“Mr. S-singer? This is Lucifer,” he started. 

“Lucifer? What’s going on? Why do you sound like that?” 

“It’s.. It’s Sam, Sir. Look, I need you to get your wife and your daughter and make your way to the airport. I will have everything arranged by the time you arrive. P-please. Sam has.. Sam’s hurt and he… you need to get here. Immediately,” Lucifer managed. There was noise on the other end of the phone, as Bobby had presumably gotten to his feet in a hurry. 

“What happened?” 

“He… I.. it was…” 

“Lucifer, _what happened to my son_?” Bobby barked into the phone. Lucifer flinched, looking at the body in front of him as the ambulance jerked to a stop. 

“He got shot. I will have someone in touch. Please… Please, get your family and go straight to the airport. I will have someone update you,” he said before hanging up, shoving the bloody phone into his pocket and getting to his feet as they began to unload the gurney. He jumped down, trying to grab Sam’s hands and getting pushed aside. 

“Sir, you have to trust us. They are going to do their best,” someone told him, pulling him back as they rushed Sam into the emergency entrance. Lucifer wailed in response, jerking out of someone’s grasp and running after the gurney. 

“Sam! Sam, no, you can’t-” he screamed, getting grabbed by a security officer as they whisked him away. He fought against the larger man tooth and nail, trying to get away and failing miserably in his weakened state. “Please… please, he’s mine, he’s mine, you can’t take him away from me, please,” he cried. He vaguely registered a handcuff being slapped onto one of his wrists. 

“Let him go. I will take over from here,” Castiel’s deep voice rang out. 

“Dr. Alighieri? Are you sure? This man is unstable, the handcuffs are purely for his own protection.” 

“Let him go.” 

“Doctor, he-” 

“He is my brother. Let. him. go.” 

The handcuffs were immediately removed then and Lucifer was released, falling to the ground. Castiel knelt down in front of him, gasping at the sight of him before carefully pulling him into his arms. 

“Shh… Shh… We have to let them work now. We have to let them work, Lucifer. You can’t do anything for him in that operating room. You have to take care of other stuff, remember?” Cas whispered, rocking his older brother back and forth. “What about his parents? Dean? Jo?” 

“Dean wouldn’t answer. Got Bobby… Got Bobby, told him to go to the airport,” Lucifer panted out, trying to catch his breath. 

“Did you call to have the flight arranged?” Castiel asked carefully and Lucifer shook his head. 

“Calling in a f-favor. Gotta.. Gotta call,” he whispered, his shaky fingers trying to dig his phone back out of his pocket as he dialed. He had the conversation right there in the floor of the emergency room, being held tightly by his brother as he made the arrangements to have the three members of the Harvelle-Singer family flown to California immediately. When he hung up, Cas forced him to his feet. 

“Lucifer, I’m going to take you to get cleaned up. You’re.. You’re covered in blood,” he explained carefully, leading him to the staff locker-room. Lucifer was stained in blood from the tips of his fingers to around his elbows, his clothes were splattered, along with his shoes, and there was even red on his face and in his hair. That part was presumably from Lucifer’s hands, the man running his hands through his hair without acknowledging that he was covered in Sam’s blood. 

Lucifer grew unresponsive, allowing Castiel to strip him down out of his shoes and suit and push him into the shower. Lucifer stood there, hot water scalding him as blood ran off of his skin, causing rust-colored water to swirl down the drain below him. He wouldn’t properly wash himself though, causing Castiel to push back the shower curtain and scrub the now-dry fluid from his brother’s hair, face, and arms. Shutting the water off, he dried off his brother, who was only now coming back to reality as Castiel tried to get him into a pair of navy blue scrubs. Lucifer managed to help a bit and then sat as Castiel washed off his shoes and placed them back onto his feet. 

“I’m going to change too, okay? Just sit still,” he murmured. His own Nemo scrubs had been soiled while holding Lucifer and he went ahead and changed into an identical pair of hospital-issued navy blue scrubs. He took the initiative to throw away not only his scrubs but the suit that Lucifer had been wearing. Even if the offending item could somehow be cleaned, Lucifer would not need a reminder of this day. 

\-- 

Castiel led his brother up to a waiting room on the fourth floor, as close to the OR as he could get him in order to be nearby whenever someone came out with updates. On their walk, he was dialing and redialing Dean’s number, to no avail, as Lucifer spoke with Lily. After Lucifer had been sat down, Castiel crouched down in front of him. 

“Lucifer, I can’t get ahold of Dean. He had a big restoration project to work on today and is probably so deeply engrossed in it that he hasn’t had a chance to even think about his phone,” Castiel explained. “I guess I should call the garage and try to-” 

“You gotta go get him,” Lucifer whispered. 

“I can’t leave you here.” 

“And he won’t be able to drive himself here if he finds out over the phone. You need to go get him. You need to get to him before one of his employees sees it on the news and tells him,” Lucifer explained, pulling at any strength he had left to sit up properly and look at his brother. “Please. He needs to be here in case… in case Sam doesn’t make it. Dean has to be here to say goodbye,” he managed, his voice cracking. 

It didn’t take much more convincing after that. Although the last thing Castiel wanted to do was leave Lucifer alone, he did need to get Dean. Lucifer assured him that his assistant, Lily, was on the way to the hospital and reached out, squeezing Castiel’s hand. 

“Unless you get a text that says otherwise, get Dean and then pick up his family from the airport. It shouldn’t be too much longer by the time you get him in the car and he’ll.. He’ll need them,” he ordered, his lower lip quivering. “If… If Dean needs to be here sooner than that.. If you need to come straight back, I will let you know,” he swore, his entire body trembling now. Castiel nodded weakly, watching as his big brother’s world was crashing down around him. 

“Okay, Lucifer.. Okay.” 

* * *

The drive to Winchester’s Garage was a tense one. All Castiel could think about now was getting to Dean before someone else did with the news. He needed to be the one to tell his partner what had happened to the one person that he loved more than anyone else in this world. He refused to think negatively about Sam, blocking out those thoughts completely and instead, hyperfocusing on his drive. 

“Dean, I need Dean,” Castiel yelled out as he made his way into the garage, having left his car in idle in the parking lot. 

“Sir, you can’t be-” Someone told him before Benny, someone Castiel recognized, stopped him. 

“Nah, this is Dean’s loverboy. He’s good. Cas, man, why do you look like you’ve seen a ghost?” 

“I need Dean, now!” Castiel shouted, way too far past pleasantries to even care about how rude he was being. Benny flinched but nodded. 

“Okay, okay, I’ll get him,” he assured, disappearing into the back. 

It was taking too long. Castiel paced the length of the floor, waiting for his partner to show his face again. When he _finally_ did, he was wiping off his greasy hands on a towel, giving him a weird look. 

“Cas, what’s wrong? Benny said you came in here shouting people’s heads off and-” 

“Dean, you need to come with me,” he told him, stopping his pacing and going over to Dean, placing his hands on his shoulders. Seeing the seriousness radiating from Castiel, Dean grew tense. 

“What’s wrong? What is it, Cas? Is it Sam? It’s not Sam is it?” He demanded. When the blue-eyed man took too long to respond, Dean shoved him away. “You didn’t come here to tell me that something is wrong with Sam. You didn’t. You didn’t because my Sammy is perfectly fine and you’re a goddamn asshole to try and make me think-” 

“He’s been shot, Dean.” 

The cry that left Dean’s lips at his words was awful as he stumbled backwards, shaking his head. He knocked into the wall behind him and gave up on his retreat. 

“No, no, you’re a liar. You’re a dirty liar and he’s.. Sammy’s fine, he’s… he’s fine, Cas, tell me he’s fine!” Dean demanded and Cas gulped harshly, carefully taking a few steps towards him. 

“He is still alive, Dean. He is in surgery. Lucifer has called in a favor and your parents and Jo are already on a flight here. Me and you are going to go wait for them at the airport and then go to the hospital,” Castiel explained. Benny, who had returned with Dean and witnessed everything, lunged forward and grabbed at Dean as the man began to fall to the floor. 

“Hey man, no, none of that. You gotta stay strong for your Sam, okay? Back on your feet, man. I gotchu… come on, you’re good. Let’s get you into the car,” Benny urged, practically carrying Dean outside to Castiel’s car. 

“We gotta… Can’t wait for my parents,” Dean whispered, shaking his head. “We gotta get there, I have to be there, Sammy needs to know that I’m there,” his voice rose as he grew frantic. Benny got him into the passenger seat and Castiel bent down to buckle him in. 

“His surgery is going to take a while, Dean. Lucifer is going to tell us if we need to come straight to the hospital, okay? He’s going to let us know. There is nothing for you to do at the hospital right now, Dean. The only thing left to do is wait,” Castiel explained, pressing a kiss to Dean’s forehead before getting back into the car and pulling off. 

\-- 

Keeping Dean from disappearing into a downward spiral was difficult. The man barely spoke while they waited at the airport for the private jet that carried his family. He asked a few questions regarding what had happened and Castiel hated that he didn’t have the answers that he needed. 

“Dean!” A woman’s voice shouted and they both looked up to see the three people they were waiting for rushing towards them. Dean got to his feet but found himself unable to move, looking up desperately at his family when his body refused to go forward. Ellen reached him first, wrapping her arms tightly around him. 

“Momma’s here, Dean. Momma’s here…” she whispered, holding him as he crumbled. She was much shorter than her son, yet sturdy and radiating a powerful energy that made her appear ten feet tall and bulletproof. His sister Jo was in tears, hiding her face in Bobby’s chest. They waited for a bit, allowing Dean to pull out of his headspace before Bobby spoke in his gruff voice. 

“C’mon son, let’s get to the hospital.” With that, he had wrapped an arm around Dean to help keep him stable and followed Castiel out to the car. The air in the car was thick, the only sound being a whimper or two from either Dean or Jo and then a comforting response from one of their parental figures. He drove as quickly as he could while still being safe and when they were halfway there, his phone started vibrating in his pocket. 

Since the device was synced with the car, the screen on his console that was typically for the radio or GPS changed to a photo of his brother and Sam in their swimming trunks from their hiking adventure - it turned out that he was guilty of not changing contact photos either. The robotic voice of his car paused the light classical music that was playing to announce the phone call: 

“ _Incoming call from Lucifer Alighieri… Incoming call from Lucifer Alighieri… Incoming call from-_ ” 

“Hello?”


	16. Looking For Answers That Nobody Knows

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You get to have answers in this chapter! Heads up, it is really short but I didn't want it to feel forced if I tried to add more to this part. And the material for the next chapter needs to be separate. BUT the next chapter is almost finished and will hopefully be up sooner than a week. Hopefully. ;)
> 
> Note, while I am not a lawyer, I am also not a doctor. I made sure that it was possible but I'm sure there will be medical inaccuracies here and there. I apologize for that. 
> 
> Enjoy! xxx

_“Incoming call from Lucifer Alighieri… Incoming call from Lucifer Alighieri… Incoming call from-”_

_“Hello?”_

“Castiel,” Lucifer’s broken voice sounded through the car speakers. 

“I’m here, Lucifer. We’re all here. Tell us what’s going on,” Castiel said gently, internally debating on whether he should pull over or not. He ultimately decided not to, as they needed to get there as soon as possible - Castiel braced himself, determined to keep calm no matter what Lucifer had to say. There was a pregnant pause in the car, the five of them waiting for the news. Dean curled in on himself as if he were physically protecting himself from the blow he believed he was about to receive. It felt as if there had been ten minutes between Lucifer’s greeting and his next words, but it couldn’t have actually been more than twenty seconds. 

“He’s alive. He’s out of surgery,” Lucifer announced quietly. 

The entire car let out a collective breath and Dean sat up, daring to allow a faint smile find his lips. 

“Castiel, he’s… There was a lot of damage, h-he…” Lucifer trailed off, unable to continue speaking and Castiel swallowed, wishing he could wrap his arms around his big brother and promise it was going to be okay. 

“He’s alive, Lucifer. Making it out of surgery alive is the first big step. We’re almost there, you can fill us in when we arrive,” Cas replied softly. It got a protest out of Dean, who wanted to know as much as he could, but Cas pressed the button on the screen anyways, ending the call. Clasping Dean’s hand in his, he gave it a tight squeeze before lifting it to his lips. “He’s alive, Dean. He’s alive.” 

\-- 

Dean shoved his way into the room, pretending not to hear the nurses when they said anything about the limits to how many people were allowed or ICU rules. He stopped short though, when he saw his baby brother in that hospital bed. If he hadn’t been assured that Sam was alive, he would’ve thought otherwise by the sight of him. His normally-tan skin was almost gray and there were tubes and wires _everywhere_ \- a large tube down his throat, a skinny one up his nose, multi-colored wires coming from his torso under the hospital gown... There were bags of saline, blood, and antibiotics hanging from the poles at the head of the bed, pumping the fluids into his system at a steady pace. On the edge of the bed sat Lucifer, who didn’t even look up when his own brother and Sam’s family shuffled into the room. He held tightly to Sam’s hand, merely staring at his face with a blank stare. 

Dean was slow as he approached the bed, almost afraid as he placed his hands on Sam’s cheeks. He let out a large breath, leaning forward and pressing his forehead against his sibling’s. “I’m here, Sammy. I’m here,” he whispered, internally praying to a god that he didn’t believe in that his brother could hear him. He stayed there for a few moments, gathering strength from the sole knowledge that he was alive. When he finally lifted his head, he turned his attention to Lucifer, face morphing from terrified to furious in a matter of seconds. 

“How did this happen?” Dean hissed at him, grinding his teeth together. 

“The man who did it, Michael Shurley… I prosecuted his father a few years ago and his execution was today. He blamed me for the death of his father,” Lucifer whispered, not looking away from Sam’s face. 

“What the hell does any of that have to do with Sam? Why is _he_ the one who’s hurt?” 

“Sam was in my office when Michael shot my secretary, Meg, and came in. Sam wouldn’t leave, we both _begged_ him to leave. He was given every opportunity to leave and he wouldn’t,” Lucifer explained, his voice becoming shaky again. “He wouldn’t leave, Dean, I tried.” 

“You didn’t try hard enough.” 

“I did! He was going… he decided he wanted to make me suffer… Said he’d kill Sam so I would know how he felt. So I did what I could to get the attention back on me - told him his father deserved it. And it worked. It fucking worked, it would’ve been me, it should’ve been me, I **wanted** it to be me,” he broke, his entire body trembling like a leaf. “Sam jumped in front of me,” he finally added, his voice barely audible. 

“You son of a-” Dean growled, launching himself at the man. His fist connected with Lucifer cheek and eye and before the lawyer could react, Bobby was there, gripping Dean with both arms and and holding him tightly. Lucifer lifted his hand to his eye but didn’t try to get him back. 

“Dean, this was not his fault,” Bobby muttered, waiting until Dean stopped struggling against him before letting go. 

“It was! He didn’t protect him.” 

“It sounds like he sure as hell tried,” Jo tried, believing the man. 

“Dean, Sam loves him,” Castiel whispered and before Dean could snark back, Ellen was taking over. 

“Exactly. Son, Sam was being self-sacrificial for the sake of the love of his life. He-” 

So far, Lucifer hadn’t truly heard any of the argument going on behind him. The sound of their voices resembled radio static more than it resembled words. But it was Dean’s yelling that came next that knocked him out of his trance. 

“Sam didn’t fucking tell you? He doesn’t love him. Sam’s been sleeping in our guest room for three damn weeks. Sam _left_ this asshole and now he’s here, holding onto my baby brother and pretending like it didn’t fucking happen!” Dean yelled. The rest of the room grew quiet, as the rest of their family hadn’t known and Castiel hadn’t expected Dean to air out his brother’s dirty laundry like this. Lucifer gripped Sam’s hand in both of his, shaking as he tried to form words. 

“We were fighting, yes,” he confirmed in a whisper, turning to look at Ellen and Bobby. “I messed up, I wasn’t giving him the attention he deserved, I was too hard on him. He left to stay with Dean and Castiel,” he explained, wanting to get that in before Dean could jump in and twist it. With his next words, he turned to face Dean himself. “But he still told Michael that we were together. He told him that just because we were fighting didn’t mean he didn’t love me and _because he loved me_ he wasn’t going anywhere. He could’ve left, Dean. We both tried to get him to leave and he wanted to stay with me,” Lucifer defended. 

“Do you really expect me to believe that shit? Because-” 

“I don’t care if you believe me or not, it’s the truth. And there’s security footage to prove it. You’ll have to sedate me if you want to get me away from Sam because there is no way I am willingly moving,” Lucifer shouted back in return, panicked at the idea of being torn away from his lover. It didn’t come down to that though, as Castiel jumped in to play referee, calming Dean down as Lucifer sank back into his own little world that consisted of nothing but him and Sam. 

Once the murderous look in Dean’s eyes dissipated, Castiel moved over to the computer in the corner of the room, logging in to access Sam’s charts so he could figure out for himself what condition Sam was in. The rest of Sam’s family was quiet, taking in the new information and trying to decipher how they felt about the fact that the man in front of them was now Sam’s ex. There was a tense silence in the room, Sam’s monitors and machines the only noise. Castiel kept his face blank as he finished reading the charts, standing and going back over to Dean, wrapping an arm around his waist. 

“So here is where we are: the bullet penetrated Sam’s chest and thankfully, it went down instead of up, which kept it away from his heart. They had to remove his spleen and half of his pancreas and they stapled his stomach back together,” Castiel explained, trying not to let the reactions of Ellen and Jo make him emotional. He had to stay strong, for Lucifer and Dean. 

“But they fixed it, right? So he’s going to come out the anesthesia and he’ll be okay?” Dean asked desperately. Castiel’s heart broke as he looked at his boyfriend, taking both of his hands. 

“He lost a lot of blood, Dean. He had a class four hemorrhage and lost about half of the blood in his body before they could get the transfusions in him,” he started carefully, looking at the other three members of Sam’s family. “Blood carries oxygen so without his blood, his brain was oxygen deprived. The brain needs oxygen to operate and when it doesn’t…” Castiel paused to look around at the people in the room. His day-to-day job was difficult. He gave bad news to parents all the time and could typically do it without becoming distraught himself. But this wasn’t just one of his patients. This was Sam: his friend, his lover’s little brother, and his own brother’s lover. It made it a lot harder to keep his composure. “Sam isn’t asleep because of the anesthesia. He’s in a coma.” 

Everybody froze, with the exception of Lucifer who had clearly already heard the news from Sam’s doctor prior to their arrival. When Dean snapped out of his shock, he was seeing red. He set his sights on Lucifer, pointing at him. 

“You. You did this. You’ve fucking killed my brother!” 

“He’s not d-” Lucifer paused, not able to even say the word. “He’s not gone. He’s still alive; you’re the one killing him in your head already,” Lucifer sneered and Dean’s body moved towards him, fist poised to hit Lucifer once more. 

“Dean Winchester!” Ellen’s voice cut through the air, making Dean’s second fist since arriving stop mid-air. If it had been anybody else who yelled at him, even Castiel, he wouldn’t have cared. He would’ve beat Lucifer until the pain inside of him was gone. But Dean respected Ellen more than anyone in the world and he immediately turned to look at her. 

“Momma, he-” Dean started and Ellen merely grabbed his arm, pulling him in close. 

“I know, Dean. I know,” she whispered, holding him as he finally began to cry. “We just have to wait, Dean. Sam’s strong. He’ll make it out of this.”


	17. If I Lay Here, Would You Lie With Me?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vignettes of what's going on while Sammy's in a coma. 
> 
> Enjoy and share some love for our Luci, yeah? xxx

_(Day 2 of Sam’s coma)_

When the door opened and revealed Sam’s nurse, Lucifer reached over to pause the music that he was playing from Sam’s playlist (he wasn’t heartbroken over that, he and Sam did not have matching music tastes) and looked up at her, raising an eyebrow. 

“Hi, I’m just here to bathe Sam, if you guys want to step out for a moment to give him some privacy..?” She tried and while Castiel stood and pulled on Dean’s arm, Lucifer only glared at her, holding onto Sam’s hand possessively. 

“You aren’t touching him.” 

“Sir, I-” 

“I will do it. But you aren’t laying a hand on him.” 

“It’s really not a good idea for the families to… I’ll take care of it, it won’t take long.” 

“He is my partner and when he wakes up, he would be horrified to find out that a random stranger has given him a sponge-bath. _I_ will take care of him,” Lucifer hissed. 

Dean went to correct him about being his partner and Castiel gripped tightly to Dean’s arm, sending him a look that dared him to disagree. Castiel had finally opened up yesterday about the conversations he had shared with both Lucifer and Sam for the extent of time that they had been broken up. He told Dean everything that the two had confided in him, leading him to fully believe Lucifer when he said that Sam admitted he still loved him. The mechanic grumbled and stomped out of the room. Castiel followed, assuming his brother could fight the nurse over this on his own accord. 

But Lucifer wasn’t one to lose a fight. So the nurse stood beside the bed while Lucifer pulled back the sheets and carefully gave his partner a sponge-bath with the guided directions of the professional. She walked him through it carefully, having Lucifer redress Sam in a fresh gown and help hold him while she changed his sheets. 

In an act of kindness, she walked him through how to move Sam onto his sides to avoid pressure sores and how to stretch out his muscles to help for when he woke up. Somehow, the grumpy middle-aged man must’ve gotten to her, because before she walked out, she promised to tell the other nurses on Sam’s team that Lucifer was free to help whenever he pleased. 

* * *

_(Day 3)_

“ _‘A lady?’ Jem raised his head. His face was scarlet. ‘After all those things she said about you, a lady?’_ ” When Ellen and Castiel walked into Sam’s hospital room for the first time that day, they found Lucifer laying in bed beside Sam, a worn copy of _To Kill A Mockingbird_ in his hands. He was reading aloud to the man, convinced that Sam could hear him. He didn’t falter when they entered, not even noticing their arrival. 

“‘ _She was. She had her own views about things, a lot different from mine, maybe… Son, I told you that if you hadn’t lost your head, I’d have made you go read to her. I wanted you to see something about her- I wanted you to see what real courage is, instead of getting the idea that courage is a man with a gun in his hand. It’s when you know you’re licked before you begin but you begin anyway and you see it through no matter what. You rarely win, but sometimes you do. Mrs. Dubose won, all ninety-eight pounds of her. According to her views, she died beholden to nothing and nobody. She was the bravest person I ever knew.’_ ” Lucifer paused, closing his eyes for a second and taking a deep breath. “You’re the bravest person I’ve ever known, Sammy,” he whispered. 

“He is, isn’t he?” Ellen interrupted, causing Lucifer to jump slightly. He looked up at the two in the doorway, his eyes wide and bloodshot. Ellen flashed him a smile, gesturing towards the book in his hands. “Chapter eleven, right?” 

Lucifer nodded, accepting a coffee cup when she came closer. 

“His birth father, John, didn’t let him read very much. He could barely read when he came to stay with us but he was on a high-school reading level before his first year with us ended. He was obsessed with books - he read whatever he could get his hands on. But that one? That one’s his favorite. I must’ve read that book with him at least a hundred times.” Her fingertips trailed over the spine of the book that Lucifer had sat down in his lap. “Did you sleep last night?” She asked softly. Lucifer shook his head, looking over at Sam in the bed beside him. 

“Not really,” he whispered. Ellen sighed, bending down to push Sam’s hair back so she could kiss his forehead. 

“We brought you a bag, since you refuse to go home,” Castiel pointed out, holding up a duffel. Lucifer’s house had been where everyone settled in, including Cas and Dean, considering he had more than enough room for everyone to be comfortable and it was still pretty close to the hospital. Castiel had forcefully removed Dean from the room for the first time the night before so at this point, Lucifer was the only one who hadn’t left. “Take a shower, Lucifer. Take a shower, eat, and then you need to lay down on that cot and try to get at least an hour of sleep,” Castiel told his brother firmly and Lucifer looked stricken, grabbing Sam’s hand. 

“We will let you know if anything happens. A twitch, a sniff, anything. We’ll both be watching him, Lucifer. But that was the point of the room with the bathroom, yes? So you didn’t have to go home?” Ellen assured and he nodded slowly. He grabbed the bookmark, sliding it between the pages and setting it down on the nightstand. “Do you want me to pick up where you left off?” She asked carefully and he shook his head rapidly. 

“No!” Lucifer answered forcefully, almost a look of panic on his face before he looked ashamed for his tone. “I can do it,” he muttered after a moment, in lieu of apology. Ellen nodded in understanding while Cas passed the bag over, forcing the lawyer into the bathroom. Once the water turned on, Ellen turned toward Castiel, a down-to-business look on her face. She searched Castiel’s face for a moment before sighing and sitting down by Sam’s feet. 

“Sam left him?” It was a question but came out more like a statement. Castiel looked anxious as he nodded slowly. 

“He didn’t want to. And Lucifer didn’t want him to either. Their dynamic regarding work was rough. And it got particularly brutal at one point - they just couldn’t figure out how to balance it anymore. But I spoke to them both while they were separated and… Ellen, they were both miserable without each other. Lucifer could barely function, Sam was always crying. They weren’t ready for it to end, they didn’t want it but they were both too stupid to just speak to each other,” Castiel explained, defending Lucifer. His brother was already only hanging on by a thread, there was no way that Lucifer would survive if Sam’s family kicked him out. 

“My boys… they’ve always been rough at communicating emotions. Sam’s always been better at it than Dean, granted, and Lord bless your soul, Castiel, for I’ve never met a man with more patience than you. But Sam… When he thinks someone’s done with him, he shuts down emotionally. He struggles to think that people can still love him after a disagreement,” Ellen explained, sighing. 

“They’re good together, ma’am. I promise. I know you’ve only seen them together at Christmas but I promise you, it wasn’t just a holiday spirit or a ‘in front of the family’ situation. They were like that all the time. It was great to see Lu really living again,” Castiel assured, taking a seat. Ellen nodded slowly, staying quiet as she stared at her son’s face. It was another minute or two before she spoke again. 

“You’re good for Dean, Castiel,” she said quietly, looking up at him. “You are. I had never seen that boy so happy. And as his mother, I know he is not an easy man to love sometimes. And I would… I would never _want_ him to lose that. But he’s… if Sam doesn’t make a full recovery, Dean will never survive this. He won’t, I promise you that. And I need to make sure that you know that you will not be expected to stay if it gets too hard. You cannot save him, Castiel. If it gets to be too much, if you can’t handle it, you can’t stay and make yourself miserable. You have to take care of yourself.” 

Castiel stood, taking the few steps to the bed and placing his hand on her shoulder. For a moment, he looked into her eyes silently before shaking his head. 

“I love your son. And there is nothing that will change that. If the worst happens, I will help him through it. I will love him through it,” Castiel promised quietly. 

Before Ellen could answer, the bathroom door opened and Lucifer stepped out. His appearance had barely improved but he at least smelled better. He was clad in a pair of sweats and one of Sam’s t-shirts, his hair still wet. They both gave him a small smile and got out of the way as he came over to the bed. Lucifer very carefully shifted Sam, active in trying to keep him from getting bed sores. Then he opened a small packet of vaseline, applying it to Sam’s lips around the ventilator tube before kissing his forehead. 

“Luce, you need to lay down,” Castiel told him carefully. Lucifer looked down at Sam, hands shaking as he shook his head. 

“Gotta work on his muscles now.” Nobody risked telling him that they’d do it instead, having learned that lesson yesterday. So they talked quietly while they watched Lucifer massage the muscles in Sam’s legs and move them around, lifting them straight up a few times and bending his knees back and forth. He repeated the actions with Sam’s arms, moving almost robotically. Sam would wake up soon, Lucifer knew it. And he knew Sam would appreciate his efforts because it would let him heal a whole lot sooner. He’d be back to his hiking in no time. 

When he finished, Lucifer accepted a bagel from his brother, noting that it had been slathered in cream cheese in what was probably an attempt to get extra calories in him. Dean walked in then, greeting Sam before the others in the room and sitting down in Castiel’s lap and curling up, still tired. 

Lucifer finished his breakfast and went to lay back down with Sam until Ellen stopped him and made him lay down on the cot they had brought in for him. That way, she explained, he wouldn’t be woken up when the nurses came in to check on Sam. Knowing better than to fight with her, he laid down on the cot, exhaustion quickly taking over. Ellen smiled softly, moving to sit by Lucifer and run his fingers through his hair until he fell asleep. 

Dean lifted his head, pressing his forehead to Castiel’s. 

“I heard what you told my ma,” he whispered. Castiel fidgeted, nervous that Dean would be offended at what Ellen had said regarding him and his relationship. There was a pause as he tried to figure out how Dean felt about it before a chaste kiss brushed against his lips. “I love you, Castiel James.” 

* * *

_(Day Seven)_

“I was stupid, Sammy,” Lucifer whispered, speaking aloud in the dark room that was empty save for the two of them. The nurses had ushered everyone else out an hour before, leaving Lucifer to take off Sam’s soft boots, bathe him, work his muscles, and brush Sam’s teeth before crawling into the hospital bed beside him. Without Sam to question him or give him _that_ look, Lucifer took his time in explaining. He just ran his fingers through Sam’s long strands of hair and admiring the facial hair that had been growing in. Sam shaved pretty frequently, never leaving more than a day or two’s worth of growth despite Lucifer’s heckling to let him see him with a beard. Now, while he liked the look on Sam, it felt wrong because Sam would’ve shaved it off if he could’ve. He made a mental reminder to talk the nurse about it before pulling the blanket up over the two of them and sniffling. 

“I drank a lot after you left. Mostly at home but I went out to a bar that second weekend. There was this guy… He wasn’t looking for much, nothing more than a hook-up and maybe a sugar daddy if I was willing,” he murmured, stomach flipping at the mere memory. He got a brief glimpse in his mind of a pretty blonde, one who had spent too much time getting ready before going out - someone with intentions of not being alone at the end of the night. 

“He was flirting with me and it felt nice so I was flirting back. And we both knew where the night was going. I was so miserable without you and I was angry and I just wanted to try to wash your memory away with cheap whiskey and a stranger. And he had his hand on my leg and kept scooting in closer and I was letting it happen and..” Lucifer trailed off, sighing. 

“I was going to take him home, Sam. I really was and I am so sorry,” he finally whispered. “But then he leaned in to kiss me and I panicked. I shoved him so hard he fell off his stool, got kicked out of the bar. I just… I couldn’t let him do it. I still wanted you, I missed you so badly and I couldn’t… I’ve been saying that you were my last first kiss and I guess I was still holding out, hoping you’d come back… And if I kissed him, you wouldn’t have been my last.” 

* * *

_(Day Nine)_

“Sir, I came to bring you the rest of Mr. Winchester’s belongings,” an officer said as soon as he walked into the room. Lucifer looked up, seeing the bag in his hands. “The hospital had to give them to us, as they were considered evidence. But considering the security camera in your office caught the entire thing, it’s a pretty open and shut case,” he clarified, handing over the nondescript bag. Lucifer took it, unsure if his fingers were going to work and grab the bag or not. Thankfully, they did. 

“Thank you for returning them to me. And thank you for your work on this,” he responded, his eyes making it clear that he was still far away. 

“Of course. My condolences regarding Mr. Winchester. We are rooting for him,” the officer assured before excusing himself. 

Dean, Bobby, and Castiel watched as Lucifer set the bag down on a chair, staring at it as if it may bite him. They were silent, not wanting to see the contents just as much as Lucifer didn’t. But Lucifer finally reached in, pulling out a clear bag filled with Sam’s clothes, stained with blood. So, so much blood. Bile rose in Lucifer’s mouth as he dropped the bag, needing it away from him as fast as possible. Trash. They were trash, he didn’t want to see them. They should’ve never been returned - they weren’t missed. 

He reached in, retrieving Sam’s shoes. Somehow they had mostly avoided the mess but Lucifer didn’t want them to be kept either, so they fell to the floor with the clothes. Thinking that was it - as Sam’s phone, wallet, and keys had already been returned a few days prior - he went to dispose of everything when he caught a glimpse of something shiny in the bag. He paused, slowly reaching in and wrapping his fingers around Sam’s watch, pulling it out and holding it out in front of him, almost as if he were scared to bring it too close. 

He hadn’t noticed Sam wearing it that morning. He had figured it had been hidden away in some drawer, if not disposed of already. The white gold was splattered with red but that wasn’t what caught Lucifer’s eye. It was broken, the dial and date stuck at the exact moment in time that Lucifer’s world had come crashing down around him.


	18. I Could Never Take the World Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's a lot going on in this chapter. I particularly enjoy the Luci/Dean dynamic but what do I know? Heads up for some homophobic language and a little bit of violence. 
> 
> Enjoy! xxx

One of the nurses, in an attempt to get Lucifer to leave Sam’s room, had told him that life had to move on. Lucifer had thrown a fit, banning her from Sam’s care and swearing she’d lose her license if she came near his room again. 

But she was telling the truth. Lucifer hadn’t left the hospital since Sam’s arrival, using Lily to complete tasks and delegating his cases to Gabriel to deal with. It had started with missing his business trip the day after Sam had gotten hurt and had gone downhill ever since. And two weeks after the incident, even Dean had gone back to work at his garage, Bobby joining him. The older man claimed he just needed something to do if he was going to stay out in California but they all knew it was so he could keep an eye on his son. 

Lucifer had Ellen and Jo flown back out to Kansas for a few days to get the Roadhouse straightened out after their abrupt departure and to grab a few more of their belongs. They’d be returning in two more days, prepared to settle in for the long haul as they hired on temporary staff. And if everyone’s bills ended up being quietly paid (mortgages and utilities, cars and cell phones, and insurances as well as monthly expenses for Winchester’s Garage and The Roadhouse) then nobody spoke about it. 

But in general, at least while the women were gone, it just meant that Lucifer was left to his own devices with Sam for the majority of the day until the three other men made their way back, forcing food into him and spending time with Sam themselves. 

Castiel and Sam’s family made it a point to never allow Dean and Lucifer to be left alone together after making that mistake a few times within the first week. When they _were_ left to their own devices, it quickly turned volatile - and Lucifer had even come out of his daze enough to hit back, giving Dean a run for his money as his eye swelled shut within an hour. But because Dean refused to let himself be seen as weak, he couldn’t show that he was terrified, even if it was just family around. So he channeled it into anger, taking it out on Lucifer with biting words and bodily harm whenever his emotions got too intense. 

“Okay, teach me,” Dean grumbled as he shoved the door to the room open, surprisingly not flanked by his father and partner. Lucifer wordlessly raised an eyebrow and Dean growled. “Show me how to fucking help him,” he tried again and Lucifer’s eyes widened a bit in surprise as he got off of the bed. 

“With his physical therapy?” Since Lucifer hadn’t left the hospital, he spent hours and hours each day devoted to helping Sam. Whereas if it were just the nurse helping, Sam’s muscles would’ve atrophied by now, making recovery a lot more difficult if- _when_ Sam woke up. 

“Yeah. Starting with those damn boots you keep putting on him. He didn’t mess up his feet so what are those even for?” Dean muttered, gesturing to the soft boots. Lucifer smiled a bit, going down to the end of the bed and carefully unstrapping the boots and setting them in the corner of the room before absentmindedly rubbing Sam’s feet and calves down. 

“Because he isn’t moving his feet, it leaves room for his Achilles tendon to weaken, which would make his foot drop. They said it’s really painful and can make it extremely difficult for Sam to walk again once he’s back on his feet. So putting the boots on help hold his foot in place as if he were standing and keeps it strong - he can wear them for up to four hours a day,” Lucifer explained and Dean nodded, looking his brother up and down. 

“Okay, show me how to help.” 

\-- 

When Cas and Bobby came in with dinner, Lucifer and Dean work were working in tandem, one on each side of Sam while they massaged Sam and then applied wrist weights and ankle weights and worked him over again, ever careful of his healing incision. The only words exchanged were various questions about treatment and then calm, patient answers, so the two other men stayed silent in the doorway as they watched, keeping an eye out in case another fight broke out. 

“And then you can use this sponge to wet his mouth,” Lucifer said, handing it over as he grabbed the vaseline. “And chapped lips are painful,” he added, using his finger to gently apply it to Sam’s lips. The ventilation tube in Sam’s mouth had been switched out for a trach tube, which was better for long term use and made it easier for Lucifer to brush Sam's teeth and keep his mouth damp. 

“Dean? Lu? You two ready to eat?” Castiel finally spoke and both men turned towards him before slowly nodding, getting their dinner from Cas before sitting down at opposite ends of the room to eat. 

\-- 

When Dean came in the next day, he shook Lucifer’s shoulder, waking the dozing man. Without a single word exchanged, they both started another round of PT for Sam. They had been working in silence for no longer than ten minutes before Nurse Jackie popped her head into the room. 

"Boys? Can you come to the nurses station? I need some signatures?" She asked and Dean nodded, slowly lowering Sam's arm and placing it by his side. Lucifer leaned down, kissing Sam’s forehead. 

“I’ll be right back, love,” he whispered to the man, following Dean and Nurse Jackie out of the room. 

When they came back no less than ten minutes later, Lucifer stopped short in the doorway, seeing the back of a stranger standing next to Sam’s bed. Dean slammed into him from behind, immediately grumbling at him for stopping before seeing what made him pause. 

“Hey, get away from him! Who are you?” Dean growled, pushing past Lucifer and grabbing the man’s arm. The man turned around with a grin and Dean froze, staring at the weathered version of a face he had once known so well. It confused Lucifer, who looked at the man with salt and pepper hair and then at Dean. He got his answer when the man opened his arms wide for a hug. 

“C’mon son, is that any way to greet your father?” 

Lucifer saw red. He had been in many, many fights throughout his life. And in his profession, he was often witness to some of the worst people that humanity had to offer - but he didn’t think he had ever gotten so angry so fast. He threw himself forward so frantically that he almost fell. He grabbed Dean’s arm, shoving him back towards Sam’s hospital bed and placing himself between John Winchester and his sons. 

“If you were a smart man, you’d turn around and walk right back out,” Lucifer growled. 

“Maybe you didn’t hear me a minute ago - I’m their dad. Get out of my way,” John responded and Dean pushed at Lucifer’s shoulder, making a face. While Dean hadn’t seen the lawyer this lucid since the shooting, he wasn’t going to stand idly by while Lucifer dealt with _his_ father - his no-longer-missing father. 

“Lucifer, calm down,” he muttered, moving to get to a spot where he could see his father face-to-face. Lucifer stayed his ground though, making sure that he was blocking access to Sam. 

“Dean, you don’t have to talk to him,” Lucifer warned. 

“You leave my kid alone. I’m just catching up.” 

“What are you doing here?” Dean interrupted, before Lucifer could start a fight. John gestured to Sam and Lucifer’s jaw clenched. Sam wouldn’t want to see the man if he were awake and Lucifer wasn’t about to allow it to happen just because Sam wasn’t in the position to tell him off himself. 

“Saw it in the news. ‘Mr. Samuel Winchester’ went and got himself shot trying to save the day. I got here as soon as I could.” 

“It’s been twenty-two days,” Dean huffed. 

“Like I said, soon as I could,” John waved off, shrugging. “Now if my kid’s over here on his deathbed, figured I’d come and say goodbye.” 

“He’s not dying,” Lucifer corrected angrily. He was sick and tired of people acting like Sam was already gone. He wasn’t, he was just taking time to heal. He didn’t care if even the doctors had become less optimistic. Sam was strong. “He’s healing. But by all means, say goodbye. Say goodbye and if in another, say, fifteen years you decide that you want to check in again, **don’t**.” 

“I don’t know who you think you are but you don’t know anything about me and my boys. That’s between me and them. But it doesn’t matter. Sam needs me _now_ and I’m here.” 

“I’m Lucifer Alighieri, Sam’s partner. Which means he’s shared enough for me to know that he’d kick your ass out if he could. He doesn’t need you now. He needed you when he was eight - but see, you managed to at least raise a son who knew the importance of taking care of family even if you didn’t uphold yourself to the same standards.” Lucifer gestured to Dean with this statement, clarifying that it was him that he was talking about. “So Dean did your job for you. And did it pretty damn well, if I should say so.” 

“Partner? You’re his _boyfriend_? I don't know what I should be more pissed about - the fact that you're almost as old as me or that the kid turned out to be a little faggot.” John asked, ignoring the whole point of everything Lucifer had just said, focusing on that first statement. His opinion on which part he found the most disturbing became clear a second later. “Always knew that kid was a weird one. Cried too much, always coloring pictures instead of watching ball with me and Dean. Should’ve known he’d turn out that way. He’s been a fucking queer since he was little - I should’ve protested more when Mary had him helping her in the kitchen.” 

The commentary added to Lucifer’s fire and, if Sam had been awake to hear it, Lucifer would’ve been quick to correct the man. He would’ve knocked that disgusted look off of John Winchester’s face in a matter of seconds. But Lucifer knew that it was bullshit. He knew that even if this man was the biggest homophobe in the states, the point of his response was to get under Lucifer’s skin - to bait him. Which is why it took a moment longer to realize that, while his Sam obviously couldn’t get upset over the statement, Dean looked broken. 

The mechanic stood beside him, pale with haunted eyes. If John could be so blunt about how he felt regarding his incapacitated son’s sexuality then what would he say if he knew about Dean? And Lucifer knew that he wasn’t necessarily supposed to know about everything that Dean had done to protect Sam and keep him alive after John’s disappearance but he couldn’t forget it. In the end, Dean was the only reason that Sam was alive and survival had come at a brutal price. John had left his preteen in charge of an eight-year-old, leaving with the knowledge that the two boys would have nowhere to live. And now he had the nerve to make one of them feel like he was worthless? 

Bobby walked in right as Lucifer’s fist collided with John’s face. 

“Boy, what are you doing?” He yelled, sitting the food down and moving to help the man whose nose was now gushing blood. Bobby held John’s shoulders, leading him towards the sink in the corner to grab paper towels. 

“Hey Bobby, meet John Winchester,” Lucifer hissed. Bobby’s shoulders tensed and he dropped the paper towels, tightening his grip on the man and turning to him for confirmation of his identity. 

“Give me those, will you?” John asked, gesturing to the towels Bobby had just dropped with one hand while the other squeezed his nose in an attempt to staunch the flow of blood. Bobby stepped on them, ignoring the request as John pointed at Lucifer. “I’ll sue you for all you’re worth, you fucking bastard,” he growled, causing Lucifer to laugh. Loudly. 

“I implore you, please try. Please. It would be the highlight of my career. And because it’s only fair, I’ll toss a couple lawsuits onto you as well, yeah? I know I’ll start with child neglect and child abandonment and then start looking into what you’ve been doing for almost two decades. If I’m feeling particularly spiteful, I think I’ll try for two counts of attempted murder of a child,” Lucifer answered with a self-satisfied smirk. 

“Seems like proper introductions haven’t been made yet. Mr. Winchester, this is Lucifer Alighieri. He owns the top law firm in the state. And my name’s Bobby, Bobby Singer. I’m the one who adopted the boys you abandoned,” Bobby explained, his voice nonchalant but his grip on John tight. This news called the man to stiffen but Lucifer wasn’t sure if it was because the knowledge of Lucifer’s profession or if it was due to finding out who it was that was restraining him. “You know, I’ve been wanting to meet you for a long time. Mighty nice of you to stop by. Why don’t we step away from the lawyer so I can thank you properly? After all, those boys have been one of the best things that’s ever happened to me.” 

Bobby gave him no choice, dragging him out of the room. As soon as it was clear, Dean’s posture fell and his eyes filled with tears. 

“Dean-” 

“I’m okay. I just… Didn’t expect that. Didn’t think I’d ever see his ass again.” 

“Are you sure?” 

“Y-yeah, man. I’m f-fine, I-” 

Lucifer reached out as Dean’s knees got wobbly and wrapped his arms around him, holding him tightly. Dean clung to him, hiding his face as he began to tremble with sobs. Lucifer was quiet after that, just holding the man as he let out seventeen years worth of repressed emotions regarding his father. 

Bobby came back about twenty minutes later, Castiel trailing after him. 

“Do you care to explain what is going on?” Castiel was asking Bobby, who calmly went over to the sink and washed blood that wasn’t his off of himself. Castiel sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose as he looked up at the ceiling before looking over at the two men by Sam’s bed. His eyes grew wide as he saw Dean’s state and he quickly rushed over, bundling Dean into his arms and leading him to the small sofa in the corner of the room. Cas gave Lucifer a questioning look as Dean hid his face once more, getting tears on a pair of Toy Story scrubs. 

Lucifer sighed, glancing over at Bobby and shaking his head. He didn’t want to know what had just happened. The less he knew, legally, the better. He turned his attention back to Sam as Bobby sat down on the other side of Dean, explaining to Castiel that the man he had just so kindly admitted into the emergency room was John Winchester. 

Lucifer strapped two pound wrist weights onto his boyfriend before slipping into the familiar routine with Sam’s physical therapy with the sound of the others talking behind him. When he finished, he grabbed the soft boots from the corner of the room. He did the straps of one of them and grabbed the other, knocking the hard plastic into Sam’s shin by accident as he pulled it over to him. His own grimace at the action almost made him miss it: 

Sam flinched. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pour out your thoughts, yeah? xxx


	19. Just Forget The World

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm overwhelmed by all of the positive comments on this story - I'm an emotional person already so I get really teary-eyed at sweet comments and there have been some that I've full-out shed tears over. I didn't imagine such a response. 
> 
> Enjoy! xxx

“Did you see that? Did he just-” Lucifer asked loudly, trying to get the attention of the other men in the room. “He moved. He responded to - he moved!” The other three jumped up, surrounding the bed and watching Sam’s unmoving body expectantly, eyes wide. When he still hadn’t moved after two minutes had passed, Lucifer furrowed his brow, looking at the men beside him. “I promise, he moved. I hit his shin with the boot, he jerked from it,” Lucifer assured frantically. 

Cas placed a hand on Lucifer’s shoulder and removed the one boot that he had already put on, setting them out of the way before pinching the bottom of Sam’s foot. It jerked when he did so and Dean grabbed Sam’s hand, moving to the top of the bed and brushing his hair back. Since Castiel knew that Sam would remain under the scrutiny of Dean and Lucifer, he slipped out to go and alert the doctor of the changes. 

“Sammy? It’s Dean. I’m here, Sam. _We’re_ here,” Dean told his little brother, watching as Lucifer took Sam’s other hand. “It’s me and Lucifer, Sam. Dad’s here too - he’s been here the whole time. And Cas, Cas is here. Momma and Jo, they have a flight back here in another day or two-” Dean was ecstatic as he talked to his baby brother, whose eyes were still tightly shut. There were tears sliding down his cheeks, which looked odd when Dean was wearing one of the biggest smiles Lucifer had ever seen on him. 

“I can have them on a flight back tonight,” Lucifer interjected and Dean squeezed Sam’s hand. 

“Did you hear that? Lucifer’s gonna get Momma and Jo back to see you tonight, Sam,” Dean added. Sam still wasn’t moving but it wasn’t deterring Dean at the moment. It just took a while to wake up from a nap like that, yeah? 

Castiel returned with the doctor in tow and Lucifer and Dean only moved down to sit on the foot of the bed, one on each side of Sam’s legs, as the doctor used his penlight to look in Sam’s eyes. He set it down before reaching out, pinching Sam’s forearm. Like before, the limb moved away and the doctor smiled brightly. 

“This is a good sign, boys. A very good sign,” the doctor assured, reaching out and taking Sam’s hands in his. He paused for a moment before moving his hands, looking back at Dean and Lucifer. “Why don’t you both take one of his hands, yeah?” He suggested. Lucifer and Dean wordlessly obeyed, slipping their hands into Sam’s. “Sam, your brother and your partner are holding your hands. Can you squeeze their hands for me?” The doctor requested loudly. Everybody stared down at the hands, waiting almost a minute before the doctor asked again, “Sam, can you squeeze their hands?” Dean’s shoulders slumped as Sam still didn’t respond to the request. 

“Sammy, come on. Just squeeze our hands. I know you’re tired, Sam, but you’ve gotta help us out here. Just squeeze our hands,” Dean pleaded. There was a pregnant pause before they felt Sam’s fingertips curl ever so slightly around their hands. Lucifer took a strong intake of breath as Dean sighed out. “That’s perfect, Sammy,” Dean assured him. After a few more seconds, Sam’s hands went limp once more. 

 

The next few hours were a whirlwind. The energy in the room was unprecedented as Sam was taken back and forth for scans, doctors and nurses shuffled in and out of the room, and Lucifer worked on getting Ellen and Jo back to California as quickly as possible. 

Despite the changes in Sam’s condition though, he didn’t just open his eyes and say hello to them. It was even hard to get a reaction out of him at all at some points, as Sam fell back to ‘sleep.’ Cas and the other doctors were still amazed - the oxygen deprivation and coma didn’t seem to leave Sam with any paralyzation and his cognitive functions were still at least somewhat intact, given the response to simple commands. 

For an event that had sparked so much hope, not much more happened in the next few days. Sam was still responding to pain and some verbal cues such as squeezing hands and wiggling his toes but there wasn’t much progress. 

Regardless, Lucifer was invigorated by the changes. The cloudy look in his eyes disappeared as he showered and shaved, getting dressed in his real day-to-day clothing instead of just his lounge clothes and Sam’s shirts. While he had been saying the entire time that Sam was going to wake up, it was evident that there was a new sense of optimism coursing through his veins. He even got out their laptops, answering his own emails and then going through Sam’s for anything important. 

In addition, Sam’s physical therapy intensified now that he was able to respond to some commands. They worked on his grip especially, managing to get to him to hold a tennis ball and a water bottle. He began to get agitated by the trach tube, coughing frequently, and the doctor decided to go ahead and remove it. He was given a nasal cannula for oxygen, just as a precautionary measure, but overall, Sam was breathing by himself. 

While Lucifer had been talking to Sam since day one with the others occasionally joining in, the others began to talk to Sam about even the most mundane of things - Dean talked about the latest cars he had been restoring, Ellen talked about The Roadhouse and everything that had happened since they had last spoken at Christmastime, Jo mentioned the cute boy who kept popping up during her shifts. Lucifer talked about cases every now and then but mostly just continued to read books to him. He had finished To Kill A Mockingbird and then started on the stack of ‘to-be-read’ books that Sam had started on a bookshelf in their home office and never actually got to. Lucifer was going through a full novel every two or three days during the worst of Sam’s condition and was now back to Sam’s stack of favorites. 

\-- 

“There wasn’t a point in considering a plea deal. The cameras caught it all, Lucifer, it was open and shut.” Gabriel’s voice was excited as it came through the phone as Lucifer sat in the windowsill in Sam’s room, staring out at the stormy sky. It didn’t rain much in southern California but the past two days, the sky had been unnaturally angry. “There’s no reason to involve you or Sam at all - it’s all right there.” 

“I appreciate you keeping an eye on the case for me, Gabriel.” 

“Doing it for myself - Sam’s a good kid. He didn’t deserve it.” 

“I’m not a praying man, but I’ve found myself promising everything I can think of to the man upstairs to fix him… I was a self-destructive disaster. I can count on my right hand the number of days I was sober after Sam left. And it wasn’t his fault, I drove him to it and I know that… But when Michael walked in with that gun… There was almost a moment of relief. I tried to get it to be me, I _wanted_ it. So no, Sam didn’t deserve it. He didn’t deserve it at all,” Lucifer said, his words punctuated by a bright flash of lightning outside. 

“Get off the phone, Lucifer,” Ellen’s voice broke through his bubble and he looked up, raising an eyebrow at her. He was a grown man, who did she think- 

“Boy, you put that phone down and come here.” 

Lucifer found himself telling Gabriel goodbye and hanging up before he was exactly sure why. Ellen opened her mouth to speak but then paused, turning to look at Sam’s sleeping figure before gesturing towards the door. 

“We’re gonna take a walk,” she said firmly, all but dragging the middle-aged man out of the room by his ear. 

“What is this about?” He asked after they had made it down a few hallways with complete silence. 

“You aren’t going to do this to my boy, do you understand me?” She answered, staring straight ahead instead of at Lucifer. 

“Do.. what exactly?” 

“You aren’t going to make him feel like he’s responsible for your mental health. When he wakes up, if he decides that he doesn’t want you, you’re going to be a man about it, do you understand me? Because if you become a ‘self-destructive disaster’ again and he feels like it’s his fault because he didn’t want a relationship with you? Forget dealing with Dean - I will take it up with you personally.” 

Lucifer sighed, looking up at the ceiling for a moment and trying to figure out exactly what he wanted to say next. 

“I wasn’t blaming him. If you haven’t noticed, I have nonexistent coping skills. My behavior after Sam left me was completely my problem.” 

“If he sees that you’re in a downward spiral, he’ll blame himself.” 

“He won’t see it.” 

“It better not happen at all,” Ellen snarked back and Lucifer sighed, stopping walking and leaning up against the wall. “Whether Sam wants you or not, you’re going to pull yourself together and go to work and move through life one day at a time. I won’t have him worried that you’re going to die in a car crash because you were drunk-driving or doing some other reckless nonsense.” 

“I never said that I-” Lucifer started and Ellen gave him a look, calmly raising one eyebrow. 

“I didn’t feel comfortable having you around after Dean told us that the two of you had broken up. But I saw the way you looked at Sam and I listened to what Castiel had to say and I believed your story. You’ve taken good care of him from the moment you met - minus a few weeks, I suppose. I had no intentions of dragging you away from him when you obviously cared so much. But if he tells you to go, you’re not going to fight him over it. You will say okay and you will leave.” 

Lucifer nodded silently, taking a few deep breaths and closing his eyes as he was forced to be face-to-face with the reality of the situation. Yeah, Sam had said he loved him before it happened, but a man will say a lot of things when there’s a gun pointed at him. He doubted that Sam would’ve stayed or even taken the bullet if he hadn’t still cared, but it was possible. It was possible that Sam would wake up and realize that he didn’t need Lucifer. 

As he tried to wrap his mind around his flurrying thoughts, a hand slipped into his, squeezing tightly. He opened his eyes, meeting Ellen’s stern gaze and he nodded slowly. 

“I’ll say okay and I’ll leave,” he confirmed quietly. 

\-- 

Sam opened his eyes on his own for the first time thirty-one days after he had been shot. Lucifer was laying in the bed beside him, holding Sam’s hand and using his free one to flip the pages of _To Kill A Mockingbird_ \- again. 

“ _‘We know all men are not created equal in the sense some people would have us believe- some people are smarter than others, some people have more opportunity because they're born with it, some men make more money than others, some ladies make better cakes than others- some people are born gifted beyond the normal scope of men. But there is one way in this country in which all men are created equal- there is one human institution that makes a pauper the equal of a Rockefeller, the stupid man the equal of an Einstein, and the ignorant man the equal of any college president. That institution, gentlemen, is a court.’_ ” Lucifer paused to take a deep breath, as Atticus’ closing speech was a long one and there was still yet one last paragraph. “Am I this dramatic in court, Sammy? Is this why people hate me - do they just want me to shut up?” Lucifer asked, laughing quietly to himself as he looked back over the monologue he had just read. 

“Lucifer!” Dean’s voice said sharply from the corner of the room and he looked up at the man in alarm. Dean was up and on his way to the bedside and Lucifer looked over at the man beside him, shocked to find a pair of beautiful hazel eyes staring back at him. 

“S-Sam?” Lucifer asked softly and Dean came up behind Lucifer so Sam wouldn’t have to turn his head to see him. Sam’s mouth opened slightly but no sound came out. 

“We’re here, Sam. Take your time, we’re right here,” Dean coached, trying not to plead with his baby brother. 

The corners of Sam’s mouth curved upward ever so slightly before his eyes fluttered shut once more. 

\-- 

Sam had opened his eyes a handful of times after that, never saying anything and never keeping them open for more than a minute or two before falling back under. On day thirty-six, Lucifer finished reading To Kill A Mockingbird aloud for the third time. 

“ _‘He would be there all night, and he would be there when Jem waked up in the morning.’_ ” Lucifer quoted, not even having to look at the book in his hands at that point. He closed it, setting it down in the chair he had been sitting in and standing, pushing Sam’s hair back. “Just like how I’ll be here when-” he paused, watching as Sam opened his eyes once more. Lucifer smiled at him and cupped his cheek. “Hey sleepyhead,” he murmured. Dean looked up at that, noticing and going over to stand beside Lucifer. 

Sam opened his mouth a few times, his face showing distress when nothing came out. Dean soothed him, taking his hand. 

“Hey, you’re okay. You haven’t used that voice of yours in a bit, you gotta take it slow,” he assured. Sam shifted, trying to look around the room and Lucifer carefully raised the head of the bed up so Sam was in more of a sitting up position. After a few minutes of staring at the walls, Sam made eye contact with his big brother. 

“D-Dean?” His voice was raspy, not really sounding like Sam at all, but it _was_ Sam - breathing, blinking, talking, _alive_. 

“It’s me, Sammy,” Dean said urgently, not bothering to pretend like he wasn’t crying. “It’s Dean.” 

“You.. you got old,” Sam managed. 

“Second thing you say and you’re already being snarky, bitch,” Dean answered, laughing. Sam’s face showed a bit of confusion but got distracted by Lucifer. 

“Hey there, my love. How are you feeling? Are you in pain?” He asked softly, cupping Sam’s cheek in his hand. Sam’s eyes were wide as he slowly shook his head. 

“N-no pain… Sleepy,” the young man answered. 

“This is the most energy you’ve used in quite a while. I’m sure you’re exhausted.. You can lay back down, we can talk more later. I’ll be right here when you wake up next, okay?” 

Sam was quiet for a bit, looking at Dean with a curious look on his face. 

“I’ve been… sleep?” Sam asked and the men nodded. 

“Yeah, you’ve been asleep for quite a while, Sammy,” Dean confirmed. 

“That’s why you look old?” 

“Baby, why do you keep saying that?” Lucifer asked gently. Sam’s face when from a calm confusion to a more distressed one. 

“Please stop calling me that,” Sam asked and Lucifer’s face fell, feeling as if _he_ had just taken a bullet to the chest. It was starting already, Sam didn't want him, he wasn't even going to give him a chance to - “I-I don’t know you, please don’t call me that.” 

Lucifer and Dean shared an alarmed looked and Lucifer pressed the emergency call button to alarm the medical personnel that they were needed. 

“Sam, that’s Lucifer. He’s your boyfriend,” Dean said softly and Sam’s eyes widened. 

“H-how old am I?” 

“You’re twenty-five, Sam. How old did you think you were?” 

Overwhelmed, Sam began to cry. The door to the room opened and it wasn’t the nurses, but Bobby and Ellen. They laid eyes on Sam, who was propped up and crying, and rushed over to him. 

“Momma’s here, Sam, Momma’s here,” Ellen said as she sat on the edge of the bed, wrapping her arms around him. Sam pushed her away, crying even more violently now. 

“No.. No! My mom is dead! You’re lying, you’re all- Dean!” His brother’s name was yelled with such fear that Lucifer, Bobby, and Ellen all jerked away from the bed as Dean moved forward to sit on the bed beside Sam, holding him. 

“I’m here, Sam. I’m here.” 

“Make those people leave,” Sam sobbed into his shoulder. With wide, fearful eyes, Dean looked up at the other three, not knowing what to do. Ellen mouthed something about a doctor and headed out with Bobby. Lucifer stood there, frozen as he looked on at his terrified partner. Bobby grabbed him by the shoulders, pulling him out of the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, it couldn't have been THAT easy... xxx


	20. Please Remember Me When the Sun Goes Down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here we go again!  
> I have two exams, a quiz, and a paper due all within the next three days so what did I do instead? I know it's a tad later than usual but life is crazy right now. 
> 
> Enjoy! xxx

“What do you mean, ‘he might not get his memory back?’ You’re making some kind of shitty joke, right?” Lucifer demanded, glaring at the doctor as if he were the one who put the bullet into his Sam. “I’m having him transported. I’ll get him to a doctor that can give us a real answer and fix him,” he growled. Castiel grabbed his arm, pulling him back and out of the doctor’s face. Castiel apologized on Lucifer’s behalf, dismissing the doctor and going face-to-face with his brother. 

“It’s not that easy, Lucifer, and it’s not his fault. He has helped Sam to the best of his abilities. It’s because of the oxygen deprivation and you know that.” 

“If he had helped Sam to the ‘best of his abilities,’ then Sam would know who I am!” 

“Sam shouldn’t even be alive!” Castiel yelled back, momentarily losing his cool. Lucifer froze, staring at his brother with an unidentifiable expression. Ellen, Bobby, and Jo had been present while the doctor was originally speaking but when Lucifer had begun to argue, they had stepped off to the other end of the waiting room. They now looked up at Castiel, looking slightly alarmed. It wasn’t that they didn’t know the information he had shouted - they just hadn’t expected the surgeon in Lion King scrubs to lose his patience with his brother. He had been the most understanding of them all when it came down to Lucifer’s rollercoaster of emotions since Sam had been shot. Now, as Lucifer remained silent with a cold stare, Castiel began to give in, sighing and running his hand over his face. 

“Lu, you know what I mean. It’s not that I’m not happy that he’s alive - he’s my friend too. But medically, he shouldn’t have made it. That bullet should’ve went straight through his heart and it _didn’t_. He should’ve died of blood loss but he _didn’t_. He shouldn’t have woken up but he _did_. And that’s wonderful. But Lucifer, it is not the doctor’s fault that Sam has no memory,” Castiel explained, keeping his voice firm despite the overwhelming need to be apologetic when looking at the expression on his brother’s face. 

“I want him fixed,” Lucifer finally whispered, taking a deep breath as his lower lip quivered, straightening his back in a refusal to get upset. 

Dean slipped into the waiting room at that moment, showing his face for the first time in the couple of hours that Sam had been awake. His family came to join them at that time and Castiel wrapped his arms tightly around his boyfriend, letting him take a few deep breaths with his face hidden from everyone. Lucifer stood impatiently, wanting an update but knowing better than to interrupt. 

“He might get his memory back, Dean. It’s a possibility. He’s going to need our help and our support, but-” Castiel was saying quietly. 

“I don’t know if I want him to get his memory back,” Dean whispered and Lucifer saw red. 

“Excuse me? What the hell do you mean you don’t want him-” Lucifer demanded and was cut off as Dean lifted his head, looking devastated. 

“He remembers our mom dying and us moving around in motels all the time, but he doesn’t remember what happened afterwards. He doesn’t remember living on the streets, he doesn’t remember starving for two years or that misery, he doesn’t feel guilty because of what I had to do to keep us alive,” Dean explained, his voice shaky. Ellen and Bobby took over then, sitting him down in one of the chairs and flanking either side of him. 

“Dean, we know it was a dark point in your lives. If we could go back and time and make sure you two had never gone through that, we would in a heartbeat. But Sam also doesn’t remember getting a new family and new friends. He doesn’t remember moving out to California with you and going to college and law school. He doesn’t remember the brother you are now, Dean. He doesn’t remember you as his brother who sacrificed everything for him, who followed him out to California without question, who followed his own dreams and opened up his own restoration garage, who found the love of his life and was _happy_. He remembers his mother dying and a few bad years of moving from place to place. He’s missing over fifteen pretty damn good years of his life. Don’t you think we should be helping him try to get that back?” 

As Ellen spoke, silent tears slid down Dean’s cheeks and he rushed to wipe them as soon as each one fell. He finally nodded, picking at the denim of his jeans. 

“Yeah.. yeah, I guess,” he muttered, looking up at the other three. Jo was crying and Lucifer had his arms wrapped tightly around her with Cas standing right beside them, rubbing her back. “Jo, I’m sorry. It’s not that I don’t want him to remember you, I was just relieved when I figured out that he didn’t remember the few years _before_ we came to live with you,” Dean explained, getting to his feet to properly apologize to his little sister. Lucifer released her so Dean could take over and turned his attention to Castiel. 

“It’s not a good idea to go in there right now, Lucifer. Let him talk to his family first, let them prep him to talk to you,” Castiel explained as Lucifer expressed his wishes to go back in to see Sam. It was difficult for him - his world had revolved around taking care of Sam, 24/7, for over a month now and now he wasn’t even allowed in the room. Dean put his chin on Jo’s head as he held her and looked over at them. 

“He’s not ready to talk to you yet, Lucifer.” 

“I’m sure if you had it your way, he’d never be ready.” 

“Give me a break. I bet you’re relieved that he doesn’t remember the break-up. But you’re going to tell him. If you don’t, I will, and it will ruin your credibility with him.” 

“Relieved? I should be relieved because he doesn’t remember three weeks when he also doesn’t remember me or our time together at all? Stop acting like such a fucking-” Lucifer growled in response, getting cut off by Castiel grabbing his arm and shooting him a deadly look. 

“I’m going to send the four of them in to talk to him,” Castiel told Lucifer after a moment, waiting for both men to begin to breathe properly again. “He shouldn’t be left alone for too long right now. There are too many questions and you don’t want him to get trapped in his head.” 

“I want to see him.” 

“Lucifer, you’re going to have to wait. It needs to be his family first.” 

“I’m his-” 

“No, Lucifer, you’re not. Even before the break-up, you weren’t his family. If Dean didn’t give explicit permission for you to be here, the nurses would’ve kicked you out on day one,” Castiel explained and Lucifer’s fists open and closed by his sides. He’d never hurt Castiel and everyone knew it, but that did nothing to shield the anger running through him. 

“Take a walk, Lucifer.” Bobby’s gruff voice broke through Lucifer’s mental litany of anger and he shook his head, still glaring. “Boy, I said _take a walk!_ ” Bobby barked and Lucifer growled before shoving a chair out of his way, stomping down the hall in the opposite direction of Sam’s room. 

\-- 

When Lucifer finally was allowed back into Sam’s room, he was actually a nervous wreck. It had been decided that Dean and Castiel - who Sam had already been reintroduced to - would stay in the room to monitor the situation. Dean needed to be close in case Sam got upset again and Cas needed to be there to force Lucifer out if necessary. So the couple was sitting in the corner of the room when Lucifer pushed open the door, smiling weakly. 

Sam looked like he had been run over by a truck. The oxygen cannula had been taken off but the feeding tube was still fed up his nose, the nurses taking the precaution to keep it in for a few days as they worked him back up to solid food. His hair, while clean due to Lucifer washing it the day before, was a mess and his eyes were puffy and exhausted. Despite this, the sight of Sam sitting there propped up in the bed still made his heart flutter. He closed the door behind him and slowly walked towards the bed. Lucifer stopped a few feet away, sliding his hands into his pants pockets and looking at him sheepishly. 

“Hey Sam. I’m Lucifer,” he said quietly. 

“So I’ve heard… uhm, so I’m dating the devil?” Sam answered, a faint smile playing on his lips. Lucifer couldn’t help but smile. 

“I’ll let you have that one for the sole reason that you never made a single Satan joke when we met,” Lucifer chided. 

“How exactly did we meet?” 

“Dean told you you’re a lawyer, right? Well, a law intern?” Sam nodded. “I’m your boss.” 

Sam merely looked at him for a moment, scanning his face and then his body before nodding slowly. 

“Is that allowed?” Sam asked quietly, curious, and Lucifer smiled. 

“Yeah, yeah it is. I’m not exactly just your boss. I’m your boss’ boss. I own the law firm,” Lucifer explained and Sam’s eyes opened wide for a few fleeting seconds. He was quiet though and began to pick at the blanket. 

“Dean said I’m twenty-five,” Sam murmured and Lucifer nodded to confirm it. 

“Yeah. You’ll be twenty-six soon.” 

“How old are _you_?” 

“I’m forty-three now.” 

“Did that bother me?” Sam asked and Lucifer smiled softly, shaking his head. 

“It didn’t, no. Does it bother you now?” 

“I guess not…” Sam said, glancing at his brother in the corner. “So we’re both gay?” he asked Dean, causing Lucifer and Castiel to snicker while Dean’s cheeks turned pink. 

“You’re gay, Sammy, and I’m bisexual. Do you know what bisexual means?” Dean replied and, when Sam shook his head, took a moment to explain. 

“You can come closer. They sat on my bed. I don’t think I would’ve had a problem with my boyfriend sitting on my bed,” Sam said after a few moments of silence. 

Lucifer bit his lip and glanced over in the direction of Dean, who was giving him a pointed look. Sighing, he moved forward and sat on the edge of Sam’s bed, by his feet. 

“What did your family tell you about me, Sam?” 

“Not much. They just said that the handsome blond man was my boyfriend,” Sam explained and Lucifer grinned. 

“They called me handsome?” He pressed, glancing at Dean, and it was Sam’s turn to blush. 

“N-no. I did.” 

The confession helped Lucifer to calm down slightly and he held his hand out silently, keeping it where Sam could take it if he wanted to. The larger hand slipped into his after a few moments of hesitation and Lucifer smiled softly. 

“Can I tell you about us? About me and you?” Lucifer asked and Sam nodded, glancing at his brother and Castiel, who gave him encouraging smiles. 

“You came to work for me almost a year ago. You applied to work at my law firm and I handpicked you. You were the first intern I chose out of the batch.” 

“Why?” 

“Because you impressed me, Sam. I don’t know if Dean told you, but you’re really smart. You’re really good at what you do.” 

“He said that a few times,” Sam admitted and Dean grumbled in the corner about being called out. 

“Because it’s true. So I picked you and then four others. I gave a speech on your first day and I looked at you and my heart stopped for a moment. I thought you were stunning. And afterwards, you didn’t come scrambling over to me to say hi - you just talked to your coworkers as if it was just another day.” 

“Isn’t that rude? To ignore the boss?” 

“You weren’t being rude. You fit right in, there was no point for you to kiss up to me.” 

“But I did eventually?” 

“You never kissed up to me. You talked to me and you worked hard. You stayed at the office really late one night to work on a case and we worked together on it. I kissed you and got really scared but then you kissed me back. And I took you home with me.” 

“Why did I go home with you?” Sam asked, then his eyes grew wide. “Did we play adult games?” 

Lucifer blanched and rubbed the back of his neck, glancing to the back of the room where Dean was now paying very close attention. Adult games. It made sense, Sam had only remembered to around age seven and Dean had made sure he was relatively sheltered prior to then. Lucifer took a deep breath and reminded himself that it didn’t matter, that Sam was a grown man now. 

“You came home with me because we had sex,” Lucifer explained, watching carefully at the various range of responses went through Sam’s face. He looked scandalized at first, as if remembering the word ‘sex’ and realizing it was something adults did, before an odd look crossed his features as he realized that he was indeed an adult. “Are you okay, Sam?” Lucifer asked after a moment, watching Sam nod. 

“I think so.” 

“Do you want me to stop for right now?” 

“No, you can keep going.” 

“Okay, just let me know if it’s too much, okay?” Lucifer asked and Sam confirmed that he would. “So we started dating right after. Do you remember what dating is? Okay, good. So we started dating and after a while, we introduced each other to our brothers,” he explained, pointing to Dean and Castiel in the corner. 

“And they started dating!” 

“Yes, they started dating after that. And me and you, we continued to work together and to fall in love. We said I love you and we were a pretty good team. You were doing a good job in court, we were spending the holidays together. Me and Cas went with you and your brother to Kansas for Christmas, where we met your family in person. I took you on vacation for Valentine’s Day.” 

“Dad says vacations are for rich people,” Sam interrupted and Lucifer could see Dean tense in his peripheral. 

“Hey Sam, we call him John now, remember? I told you that. Bobby took over being our dad,” Dean corrected gently and Sam’s face twisted for a moment before he nodded, still not exactly knowing why Bobby was supposed to be his dad now. 

“Vacations mean different things for different people. But uh, you could say that we have a good amount of money,” Lucifer said carefully. 

“We?” Sam asked and Lucifer sighed. Apparently he hadn’t been too careful. 

“Uh, me and you. You moved in with me and I told you that we could share money.” 

“How do you share money?” 

“You put it in one spot and allow whoever you’re sharing it with to know where you put it so they can use it when they want to.” 

“If we’re both using the money, doesn’t that mean we run out faster?” 

“We don’t really run out, Sam. We have a lot of it so we can both use it and it doesn’t run out,” Lucifer explained. Going into detail about how Sam was uncomfortable with him calling it ‘their’ money and just the existence of it in general was too much for right now. 

“Are we rich?!” Sam asked, almost excited. Lucifer couldn’t help but chuckle and he nodded. 

“You could say that,” Lucifer confirmed. Sam smiled for a moment, then looked down towards the end of the bed and then at Dean before his eyes lit up. 

“Oh! Does that mean we have enough money for shoes? Mine started hurting so Dean gave me his other pair but now the ones he’s wearing have holes in them. Can we get Dean new shoes?” 

Lucifer had planned on talking to Sam until the younger decided that he had enough, that he couldn’t accept any more new information in his brain. But Sam’s question knocked the air out of him so badly that his hand was shaking when he lifted Sam’s hand to his lips, pressing a kiss to the back of it before letting go and nodded. 

“Yes, Sam. We can get you _both_ new pairs of shoes,” Lucifer said, his voice shaky as he got to his feet. He gave a quick excuse before exiting the room, leaving Dean to gently remind Sam that they both had everything they needed. 

By the time Lucifer had calmed down enough, had stopped crying, Sam was asleep. He walked into the room, finding the young man passed out again, exhausted after an evening full of new discoveries. Ellen, Bobby, and Jo had gone out for dinner and Castiel and Dean were half-asleep on the sofa. Lucifer sighed, wanting nothing more than to crawl back into the bed beside Sam and wrap his arms around him; he refrained because he didn’t want Sam panicking when he woke up. So he grabbed a chair and pulled it up to the side of the bed, taking Sam’s hand in his. He laid his head down on the edge of the bed, falling asleep right there. 

\-- 

Lucifer woke up to a large hand in his hair and he blinked his eyes open, bewildered until he remembered that Sam was awake. He then smiled softly, closing his eyes again for a moment, relishing in the touch before feigning waking up. Sam’s hand pulled away and he tried not to look disappointed as he sat up. His back _screamed_ at him, reminding him that he was an idiot for sleeping like that through the night. 

“Why didn’t you go home to sleep?” Sam asked quietly and Lucifer rubbed his eyes, ignoring the pain as he looked at him. “Everybody else did - except Dean.” 

“I haven’t been home since you got hurt, Sam,” Lucifer said honestly, watching Sam’s eyes widen. 

“Why not?” 

“Because I didn’t want to leave you. I wanted to take care of you and make sure there was someone here if you needed it.” 

“But I just slept?” 

“Yeah, you just slept. It was okay. I read you lots of books.” 

Sam seemed to think for a couple minutes before looking back at Lucifer, tilting his head a bit. 

“And then I didn’t remember you… I’m sorry.” 

“It’s not your fault, Sammy. We’re going to get your memory back.” 

“How?” 

“I… I don’t know yet,” Lucifer admitted sadly. He glanced about the room, noticing the empty formula bag on the bedside table. “Who gave you breakfast?” 

Sam lifted his hand to the tube in his nose, frowning a bit, and Lucifer couldn’t help but smile, slightly amused. 

“Dean did. They tried to get me to drink something.. A shake? But I couldn’t. So he had to push something into this tube,” Sam explained and Lucifer nodded. 

“Yeah, that’s how we’ve been feeding you while you were sleeping. We had to make sure you were getting all the nutrients you needed so your body would stay strong,” Lucifer confirmed. 

“And Dean said you kept me clean?” 

“I did. I washed you every day and your hair every few days and I brushed your teeth every morning and night,” Lucifer confirmed, watching as Sam blushed. “See Sam, I love you, and I wanted to be the one to take care of you. I know you didn’t want strangers cleaning you.” The sentiment didn’t really help now, considering _Lucifer_ was now a stranger to him but he had at least tried. And while Sam was still embarrassed, he seemed to realize the effort that Lucifer had tried to put forth. 

“Can you finish telling me about you? And us?” Sam asked and Lucifer smiled softly, nodding. 

“I can, yeah. You want to know about me in general?” Sam nodded. “Okay. So my name is Lucifer Ross Alighieri and I just turned forty-three. I-” 

“Just? While I was sleeping?” 

“Yes, while you were sleeping. And you gave me the best birthday present of all by waking up - it was just a tiny bit late,” Lucifer confirmed with a smile. 

“Were we going to do anything for your birthday?” 

“We didn’t talk about it. We were planning a trip soon though because your birthday and your graduation are within the same week.” 

“Graduation?” 

“You’re done with school. You were in your last year of school and now you’re done.” 

“Do I still graduate after sleeping?” 

“See, we told you that you’re really smart, yeah? Well, you’re so smart that you finished all your schoolwork before you got hurt. So yes, you still graduate after sleeping,” Lucifer confirmed. Sam had actually finished his thesis right before they had broken up and Lucifer knew that it had been turned in. When he had gone through Sam’s emails a few days ago, he saw that his graduation application had been accepted. Sam would still get his degree, despite not remembering his education - Lucifer would deal with the ethics of that at a later date. 

This got them on a tangent, discussing Sam’s education and career. Apparently Dean had told him a bit about his childhood this morning and, excluding details on why, explained that Sam had learned how to properly read after moving in with Bobby and Ellen. There were a lot of questions that Lucifer deferred him to Dean to answer, knowing Dean should be the one to tell him. 

Dean actually ended up being the first person to join them for the day and explained that he had gone back to Lucifer’s after helping Sam this morning and had gotten ready for the day with Cas before they both came back to the hospital - Dean coming to Sam’s room while Cas went off to the pediatric ward. The rest of Sam’s family joined soon after, talking for a little while before the nurses came to retrieve Sam for intensive physical therapy. In the end, Sam confirmed that Lucifer and Dean could join, and Lucifer pushed Sam’s wheelchair down the hall, merely feeling appreciative that he was able to do so. 

Sam was in that room for hours as he was assessed with task after task. The therapist would list three objects and have Sam repeat them back to her in order. When he finally got it right, she upped the number to five. She had him looking at pictures on flashcards and naming what it was, she had him trying to hold a pen, she had him holding and throwing a ball. Sam was made to sit up on his own (without the bed or chair propping him up) and later she strapped the one pound weights on his wrists before getting him to copy her arm movements. As Sam was giving up for the day, already absolutely exhausted and teary-eyed, she urged him to try to stand. Dean quickly jumped in to say that it was enough for today but she was determined to have him completely upright for a few seconds, even if he was being held up. So Dean helped Sam, practically holding the entirety of Sam’s body weight up as Sam gripped onto the railings. He was crying, past his mental and physical threshold for the day, and Lucifer murmured encouragements to him as he held him get settled back into the wheelchair. 

“Shh, shh.. Come on. It’s over today, it’s over. Come on, let’s get you back to bed,” he promised, wiping Sam’s cheeks before pushing him out of the room. Lucifer tried not to get too angry, knowing that the therapist had merely been doing her job, but he only succeeded in making sure Sam knew that he wasn’t upset with _him_. 

They were supposed to try again with another shake for Sam’s dinner but Dean and Lucifer quickly agreed that they were going to leave him alone. So Lucifer used Sam’s ng-tube to push his formula through while Dean laid beside him on the bed, running his fingers through Sam’s hair and humming quietly to soothe him. It was only five in the evening, but Sam fell asleep in his brother’s arms and didn’t wake until morning. 

\-- 

Sam had been awake for the three days before Lucifer got his chance. 

The day after his extensive therapy assessment, Dean had spent the morning telling Sam why Bobby and Ellen were their parents and helping Sam begin to process everything. Dean and Lucifer practically had to force Sam to go to therapy that day and, while it turned out not to be as horrible as it had been the day before, Sam was still in tears by the time they finished. Dean had chosen to push Sam back to the room while Lucifer walked beside them, Sam grasping his hand tightly. 

To everyone’s surprise, Sam didn’t immediately fall back asleep. He managed to get down half of a protein shake before laying in bed to talk to all four members of his family for the first time since learning the truth about how it came to be that they were in his life. Castiel and Lucifer had elected to have dinner together in the hospital cafeteria in order to give the family some time alone. 

So all in all, by the time Lucifer finally sat down to tell Sam, Dean was getting impatient. Lucifer knew it had to be done that day or Dean would tell Sam before he could. So Lucifer sat on the edge of the bed and began to explain where things went wrong while Dean brooded in the corner of the room, preparing for Sam’s reaction. 

“We started fussing after that,” Lucifer explained, finding Sam’s hand. “I started listening to what other people were saying about me and you and my capabilities as a leader. And I let it get to my head… I wasn’t very nice to you after that,” Lucifer told him quietly, trying to force himself to look Sam in the eyes. 

“What did you do to me?” Sam asked, looking scared. It may have just been the residual effects of Dean telling him about his father but it hurt to have that look directed towards him. 

“I didn’t hit you, Sam. I was just kinda mean to you. I got an attitude with you and I made you do a whole lot of work, which made you upset. I wasn’t being fair and you realized that but I didn’t. So we got into a fight and… and when I came home that night, you weren’t there.” 

“Where was I?” 

“You had packed your things and gone to stay with Dean and Castiel, Sam.” 

“I left?” 

“Yeah. You left me,” Lucifer confirmed, hands shaking a bit. Sam frowned and forced a tighter grip onto Lucifer’s hand. 

“But it was okay? I came back? Stop looking so sad.” 

“You didn’t come back to me, Sam,” Lucifer whispered and confusion passed over Sam’s features. “You broke up with me. You left me.” 

“But you’re.. You’re my boyfriend? You said you love me?” 

“I do love you, Samuel Winchester. I love you so, so much. But we weren’t boyfriends when you got shot. You had broken up with me and moved out.” 

Sam looked at Dean in the corner, attempting to understand as he let go of Lucifer’s hand. 

“I was mad at you? I didn’t like you when I got hurt?” 

“It’s not that easy, Sam, you-” Lucifer rushed to defend and Dean huffed, coming over to them. 

“Yes, Sam. You were mad at him. When you got hurt, you were in his office because you were fighting with him. You had left him,” Dean confirmed and Sam looked over at Lucifer, a look of betrayal on his face before looking back at Dean. 

“Why is he here? Why did you say he was my boyfriend? You let him lay with me and touch me but we weren’t together anymore?” 

Lucifer sighed and got up while Dean defended himself, grabbing his laptop from the windowsill and opening it, finding the file he was looking for before going back over to Sam’s bed. 

“Sam, I never stopped loving you. We were fighting and you left but I still loved you. And you still loved me. And I have not left your side since you’ve been hurt,” Lucifer explained cautiously. “Now, I have proof of how you felt about me right before. I do but to see that also requires you to see what happened to you and how you got hurt.” 

Before Sam could even process that, Dean was yelling. 

“Are you fucking kidding me? You aren’t showing him that. You’re going to traumatize him!” 

“I spoke with his therapist, Dean,” Lucifer explained before turning to Sam, deciding to talk to him about it first. “I talked to your therapist. Diana, the one you like? The one you talk to, not the one who makes you do stuff. And she said that she thinks it could help you to watch it. She said it could help trigger your memories and even if it doesn’t, it will help you from feeling like you don’t know anything about why you’re in this position. You don’t have to watch it yet, Sam, if you’re not ready but-” 

“Of course he isn’t ready! It’s been three days, Lucifer, he’s not-” Dean yelled. 

“I want to watch it.” Sam’s quiet voice cut Dean off and Dean looked at his brother, slightly betrayed. “I want to watch it, Dean. I want to know what happened to me.” 

It took a few more minutes for Dean to give in and allow it before Lucifer placed the computer on Sam’s lap. Dean sat down in the bed beside his brother, not wanting to see it but also not wanting him to watch it alone - Lucifer had offered the footage to everyone once he had it, wanting to clear his name and Dean was the only one who chose not to watch. Lucifer stood on Sam’s other side and shyly asked to hold his hand. Sam shook his head in refusal and, feeling gutted, Lucifer started the video of the security footage. 

The clip started with Sam storming into the office with the recommendation letters and went through the following fight. All three of them flinched as a gunshot sounded from the computer, signaling Meg’s death in the next room. Sam watched, entranced, as Michael entered and his own voice came through the speakers, telling the man that he wasn’t going to leave. After security footage Sam took Lucifer’s hand, Sam found it okay to do the same in real-time. Lucifer clung tightly to it as they watched as Lucifer tried his best to get the gun off of Sam and Sam jumping in front of him, his body jerking and falling to the ground as the bullet entered him. The footage went smoky after that, the SWAT team’s smoke bomb filling the room and the noises were loud as they grabbed Michael. But because of the location of the security camera, Lucifer’s voice was still picked up: 

“ _Sam? Sam, open your eyes… You gotta keep looking at me, Sam, open your eyes… Sam! Don’t you die on me, don’t you fucking dare! Look at me, baby. Open your eyes and look at me. I’m right here, I’ve got you… I love you, Sam, please, you can’t do this to me. You can’t... Please, Sam, look at me. Just open your eyes… You fucking idiot, why would you be so stupid? Come on, open your eyes, goddammit!_ ” 

Dean leaned forward, slamming the laptop shut to end it and they all three stared at the wall for a few moments, trying to remember how to breathe after watching it. Because they hadn’t been looking at him, they had yet to see the tears sliding down Sam’s face. But it was Sam who broke the silence with a loud sob, “I still can’t remember!” 

Dean’s arms wrapped around his brother and he rocked him carefully back and forth until he stopped sobbing so violently, assuring him that it was okay and his brain was just still too tired. 

“I’m sorry, Sam. I’m sorry. I’ll pack up my stuff and go, okay? I know that your recovery will go well, you’re so strong, Sam.. I’m sorry, I’ll leave,” Lucifer rambled, remembering the promise he had made to Ellen about not pushing his luck if Sam decided he didn't want to see him. Despite that, he was still crying himself as he grabbed the laptop and began to put it into his bag, along with articles of clothing laying over the chair. "You'll be okay, Sam. I'll talk to Dean, I'll get all your stuff to you, I'll make sure you're taken care of, okay?" Sam had lifted his head to watch him, tears slowly sliding down his cheeks as he tried to decipher the pained feeling inside of him as he listened to this stranger say goodbye to him. 

“Lucifer?” Sam mumbled quietly after watching him for a moment. The older man turned to look at him, face making it obvious that he expected to be yelled at. 

“Yes, Sam?” 

“Stay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're nearing the end of this journey, my loves! 
> 
> I have some drabbles in mind for the aforementioned holidays and vacations spent together - is there interest in that? 
> 
> And again, thank you! xxx


	21. It's All About Compromise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Life's been busy lately, to put it simply. Not gonna lie, I probably won't have the next chapter up within a week, unfortunately, but it will be up as soon as it's ready! 
> 
> Heads up for panic attacks and mentions of PTSD.

“Don’t you have work to go to?” Sam asked him one day, as Lucifer walked out of the bathroom with wet hair and clad in a pair of sweatpants and an oversized t-shirt. Dean snickered as he grabbed his own phone, wallet, and keys, dressed for the garage. 

“I.. I haven’t been to work since you got hurt. I stay here with you. I needed to take care of you,” Lucifer explained, running the towel over his hair. 

“But I’m awake now,” Sam expressed, making Lucifer smile. They both paused to tell Dean goodbye before getting back to the conversation at hand. 

“I’m quite aware that you’re awake, Sammy. But you still need taking care of.” 

“The nurses are nice and my.. Mom and sister.. They’re still here. You would still come back after work, right?” 

“I mean, of course, Sam, but I-” 

“It can’t be good for you to stay here with me all the time.” 

“I like being with you, Sam. Work isn’t as important as you are.” 

“If I could leave this hospital right now, I would. I’d go on that trail you showed me pictures of, with all the trees and the bird’s nest? And the water? If I had the opportunity to leave, I’d _run_ ,” Sam said wistfully, looking at the window. This didn’t bring the effect that he thought it would, as Lucifer just grew more concerned. 

“I wasn’t aware you were so miserable. What do you hate? I’ll get it taken care of. You said the nurses are nice; is it the physical therapist? I know you think she’s mean but she’s just-” 

“Lucifer!” Sam’s voice was loud, trying to get him to stop rambling. When the older man gave him a deer-in-the-headlights look, Sam laughed and Lucifer couldn’t help but smile at the sound. “I just meant that I don’t want to be here in general. Nobody’s being mean, there’s nothing to fix, I would just prefer to be outside of these walls. So do it for me? You don’t have to go hiking for me but just get outside of this hospital.” 

“I can’t help you with your P.T. if I’m at work.” 

“You can do half days, like Dean! You can come back in time to help.” 

“Can’t I just-” 

“Lucifer.” 

“What about in the mornings then?” 

“Ellen and Jo. And Castiel pops in when he can, you know that. I won’t be alone. Please, for me?” 

\-- 

And that’s why, forty-four days after Sam had been shot and eight days after he had woken up, Lucifer left the hospital for the first time. He and Sam agreed that he would stay that day and then the next morning, he would go to work for half the day. 

Lucifer almost didn’t even regret it when he saw the look in Sam’s eyes when he stepped out of the bathroom in a navy blue suit the next morning. He tried not to let it mean too much to him - it was just a natural response, not one consciously made by Sam, but it was nice to know that the man still found him physically attractive even if he didn’t remember him. He had still fussed over Sam for a bit before Sam had Dean drag him out, grinning as he watched. Lucifer walked to the parking lot in silence as Dean rambled, attempting to assure Lucifer that Sam would be fine but sounding like he was trying to convince himself more than anything. 

“And we’ll meet back here by one-thirty so we can join Sam for P.T. at two,” Dean reminded as they got to Lucifer’s car. It had been brought here by someone - maybe Ellen and Bobby, maybe Lily, he didn’t know - and it felt odd to slide behind the wheel for the first time in so long and even weirder to drive in the morning traffic. 

At the office, his employees were very surprised to see him. Pleased, it seemed, but surprised. They treaded carefully, having been fed updates on Sam’s condition through Gabriel but not knowing exactly what to say now. Deciding not to even mention Sam, most just said hello or that they were ‘glad he was back.’ Lucifer was very tense, uncomfortable but pretending not to be. 

A hand clapped him on the shoulder and Lucifer turned suddenly, finding it to be Gabriel. At the sight of his old friend, he calmed, and they hugged tightly for a moment. 

“You’re a sight for sore eyes, old man.” 

“I’m only two years older than you, shut up.” 

“Three years, for the next few weeks,” Gabriel corrected. “You just come to grab some things?” 

“I promised Sam that I’d start coming back to work for half days.” 

“Oh! That’s great… Do you uh, want me to go upstairs with you? To your office?” Gabriel offered, looking slightly nervous now. Lucifer shook his head though, declining the offer and making his way up. 

The first thing that hit him was the sight of a redhead sitting at the desk. He hadn’t had time to properly mourn Meg’s death and selfishly, he had barely thought of her in the mess with Sam. Regardless, seeing someone new there hit him hard. Stopping short, he merely stared at the young woman, taking a few deep breaths. She eyed him, concerned for just a moment before her eyes lit up and she stood, coming around the desk with her hand out. 

“Mr. Alighieri! Hello! I’m Anna. I’ve been assisting Mr. Novak in taking on your workload but I’m looking forward to assisting you with anything you need, Sir!” Not Meg. Not Meg, not Meg, not- 

“It’s nice to meet you, Anna. I appreciate it, although I won’t be taking much on just yet. I’ll be spending my time catching up on paperwork and the business side of things,” Lucifer said, never taking the woman’s hand. 

“Okay! Well, you know where I am if you need me,” she replied, looking a bit dejected at Lucifer’s rejection. He couldn’t help but think that Meg would’ve taken something like that in stride, maybe even questioning if Lucifer thought he was too good to touch her. So he merely gave her a tight-lipped smile, nodded, and headed towards his office door. 

The door was new, he could tell, and he briefly wondered if it had been that damaged. He carefully shut it behind him before looking around, his eyes scanning his surroundings as he stood with his back to the door. 

Lucifer’s eyes found the carpet first. It must’ve been replaced because the last time he saw that carpet, it had been stained with Sam Winchester’s blood. In fact, it looked as if the desk and maybe even his bookshelves had been replaced too. Someone - Gabriel, most likely - had taken the initiative to try to wipe away everything that had happened. 

As he took a few steps forward, he saw red on the floor out of the corner of his eye and his head jerked, finding nothing there when he properly looked. Shaking his head, he took a deep breath and moved over to the desk, sparing a glance at his security camera before taking a seat in his chair. He sat for a few minutes, staring at the wall until he could’ve swore he saw red again. His entire body jerked as he tried to look, succeeding in knocking a stack of books off of his desk with a loud crash. 

Lucifer forgot how to breathe. 

He stared up at the door, expecting it to come rushing open as he fell into a dark place in his mind. The gunshot, the door, Sam refusing to leave. Lucifer experienced the entire thing as if time had rewound and as the gunshot went off in his head and Sam’s body jerked, Lucifer fell to the ground with a loud scream, seeing nonexistent blood pooling up on the floor. 

“No, no, no, Sammy, no, you’re not allowed to leave me, you can’t leave me here, you can’t!” Lucifer yelled, looking at his hands that now looked as if they were dripping with blood. He could _feel_ the sticky liquid on him and he continued to scream, wrapping his arms around himself. 

\-- 

The elevator door opened and a stone-faced Dean Winchester stepped out, immediately seeing a girl who couldn’t have been older than twenty being comforted by a short man with long blonde hair. 

“Where is he?” 

“You’re not Castiel,” Gabriel responded, protective over his boss. 

“I’m Sam’s brother and Castiel’s boyfriend. Where. Is. He?” 

“I don’t know what happened! I heard him scream and I tried to knock but he didn’t answer, he just started screaming even more at the sound. I opened the door and he was grabbing at the ground, saying something about an idiot and not to die. I said his name a few times but he didn’t acknowledge me - I didn’t want to touch him. I got Mr. Novak and he couldn’t pull him out of it either!” Anna exclaimed as Dean Winchester stormed past her desk and followed the direction of Lucifer’s sobs. 

Dean found the man in a ball on the floor, violently shaking and mumbling the words ‘Sam’ and ‘blood’ in between choked sobs. 

“Lucifer, come on man, it’s over. It’s over, Lucifer. Sam’s alive,” he said firmly and Lucifer didn’t even flinch. Dean sighed, getting down on the floor beside him and pulling the man in tight against his chest. Lucifer’s screams got louder and Dean just tightened his grip on him, holding his arms down so he couldn’t hit him or anything. “Lucifer, it’s Dean. Michael’s not here and Sam is alive. He is at the hospital, remember? He’s waiting for us to come back to help him.” Lucifer stopped fighting the mechanic but was still sobbing, far too out of it. 

“Please don’t, please don’t,” Lucifer sobbed and Dean sighed, tightening his grip even more and continuing to assure him that Sam was alive. At one point, Gabriel and Anna came and stood in the doorway, but one look from Dean had them both scurrying away. Dean sat there for a long time, waiting for Lucifer to come out of it; it took longer than he expected but eventually he calmed down enough for Dean to get up and practically carry him to the elevator and then to the Impala. They were almost at the hospital when Lucifer spoke properly for the first time. 

“Dean?” 

“Yeah, Luce, it’s me. You with me now, bud?” 

“Is Sam-” 

“He’s fine. He’s waiting for us to get back, we’re almost there,” Dean confirmed, taking a brief glance at the man in his passenger seat. It had been a while since he had seen him looking that small. The ride was quiet for a few more minutes before Lucifer cleared his throat. 

“Why… how did you know?” 

“To come and get you? Your secretary tried to get you out of it then told that Gabriel guy, who called Cas. Cas was going into surgery, so he called me. Not the Winchester you wanted but the one you got, nonetheless.” 

“I’m sorry.” 

“It’s no problem.” 

“It is.” 

“Look, Sam cares about your ass. Or, he did, and now he’s taken a liking to you again. And Cas cares about your ass. Which means that I care about your ass.” 

“You don’t have to have my back just because-” 

“Sam was in love with you. And you may be the son of a bitch who broke his heart but he forgave you for that. And look, you’ve gotten my brother the best care that money can buy. Hell, I wouldn’t have the garage anymore by now and my parents wouldn’t have the Roadhouse if it weren’t for you. The least I can do is save your ass when you get stuck in your head,” Dean explained, his voice making it clear that his word was final. Nobody spoke again until they got out of the car and were headed up to Sam’s room. 

“Thanks, Dean,” Lucifer said quietly. Dean turned his head, looking him over before nodding and slapping a hand on his back. 

\-- 

“Dean! You’re back early,” Sam said excitedly as his big brother walked through the door forty-five minutes before he was expected. It wasn’t until Dean had given him a hug and moved back that he saw the state of the man who had walked in behind his brother. Lucifer’s suit was wrinkled, his face was tear-stained, and his bloodshot eyes still looked a bit cloudy. Sam frowned, patting the side of the bed for Lucifer to sit. 

“What’s wrong, Lucifer?” 

“I… It was too early to go back.” 

“I thought it’s been a month and a half.” 

“It was too early.” 

“But Lucifer, you-” Sam tried and Dean reached out, putting a hand on Sam’s arm and giving him a look that told him to stop pushing. 

“It was too early for him, Sammy.” 

Sam paused, looking Lucifer over for a minute before holding his hand out, almost shyly. 

“You can hold my hand if you want to,” Sam murmured, watching the slight smile that found Lucifer’s features as fingers intertwined with his. 

* * *

“I’m an idiot, Dean, I should’ve realized,” Cas mumbled, standing outside of Sam’s hospital room that evening. Lucifer was spoon-feeding Sam mashed potatoes in the room and then held gently to his wrist when Sam wanted to try to do it himself. 

“Look Cas, I told the dude to go to therapy on week one.” 

“As an insult. You also punched him in that same conversation.” 

“It still stands! I told him to see a therapist!” 

“I should’ve seen it, Dean. I’ve been so focused on Sam and helping your family and then making sure that Lucifer was at least getting his own basic needs met that I didn’t even realize he had PTSD.” 

“You’re a surgeon, not a mental health specialist. Nobody expects you to know-” 

“He’s my brother!” Cas exclaimed, tugging at his messy hair. “I’m all that man has left Dean, you know that. Out of all of us, it’s just me and Lu now and I even added to the pressure for him to go back today.” 

 

Back in the room, Sam and Lucifer could hear the conversation outside of the door. They tried to ignore it but the curiosity became too much for Sam, who started asking questions again. 

“Why are they fighting?” 

“They’re not fighting, Sam. Cas is just worried about me.” 

“Why?” 

“Because of what happened when I went to work today.” 

“What happened? You never told me.” 

“I… I uh, had a flashback. The last time I was in that office, I was holding you and trying to keep you from bleeding out. And I got trapped in my head, I thought it was happening all over again,” Lucifer explained and Sam got quiet for a minute, messing with the spoon. 

“What is PSDT?” 

“PTSD. It’s post-traumatic stress disorder. Some people get it when they go through something stressful like we did.” 

“Do I have it?” 

“Considering you don’t remember what happened…” 

“Oh… What did he mean, that it’s just you two now? Do you not have parents?” Sam asked and Lucifer’s face immediately darkened. “Oh. Can I not ask that?” 

“No.. No, you can ask anything, remember? Anything at all, it’s just.. That’s a touchy subject on my end.” 

“You don’t have to-” 

“You knew before. I’m okay with you knowing… Um, to put it short, no, I don’t have parents anymore. See, we had a big family. Our parents, two sisters, and two other brothers. But they all.. They died.” 

“How?” 

“I came home from college for Christmas break and while I was there, I convinced Cassie to go out with me. See, I was the oldest and I loved all my siblings but I had a real soft spot for Cas. He preferred to stay in but I wanted him to uh, live a little. So it comes down to it and when we’re leaving, he tells me he’s not feeling too good. I thought he was trying to get out of it or it was just nerves, so I made him come with me anyways. It was a little past midnight when he almost passed out from the pain in his side. So I rush the kid to the hospital and call our parents - Cassie’s appendix was close to rupturing, he needed emergency surgery. They gave permission over the phone and packed everyone in the car to come meet us at the hospital. I promised Cas that they were on the way and they wheeled him off to surgery,” Lucifer explained, glancing towards the door. They could no longer hear their brothers fighting. 

“They uh… they got in a car accident on the way to the hospital. Our parents and our brothers died on impact and then our sisters died in route via ambulance.. Cas went into surgery with a family of eight and woke up to just me.” 

Sam was quiet for a moment, looking sad as he stared at their intertwined fingers. 

“How old was he?” 

“He was seventeen. I got custody of him so he wouldn’t be placed in a home and then I took that second semester off to stay at home with him so he could finish out high school. I had to take care of my dad’s estate anyways.” 

“And after he finished high school?” 

“We sold the house and he moved into the apartment I was living in here in Palo Alto. I finished law school, he started undergrad. I bought my - and now _our_ \- house and he lived with me throughout med school before buying the townhouse that he currently lives in with Dean. He coped pretty damn well, a lot better than I did, but he’s right - it was just us.” 

“Cope?” 

“It means how he dealt with it. He dealt with the situation really well.” 

“How did _you_ cope?” 

Lucifer grew quiet after that, not as open to sharing his own personal failures as he was his tragic backstory. Sam had known, of course, but not until after he had secured him, not while he was courting him. 

“Uh, to put it lightly, I turned to alcohol.” 

“My dad - uh, John, he did too. He would drink a lot and then he got mean. Did you get mean?” 

“Nah, I don’t get mean when I drink. If I’m in a bad mood and I’m drinking, I get sad. If I’m in a good mood and I’m drinking, I get really sexual,” Lucifer explained, smirking at the look that crossed Sam’s face. “I get handsy with certain people - like you - or make suggestive comments, stuff like that. You obviously don’t remember, but we had an office party, before me and you got together, and I definitely sought you out when I was tipsy enough to get the courage to do so,” he added with a grin, appreciative to slip away from the real question regarding his coping mechanisms. “You later described it as rather flattering and said you didn’t know what to do when I started flirting with you because you didn’t know if I was really interested or if it was just the alcohol.” 

“Did we always like each other?” 

“I mean, I’d say so. From day one, like I’ve said, I definitely felt something the first moment we locked eyes and you’ve said previously that you already had, and I quote, ‘an intellectual crush’ on me before we met.” 

“What does that mean?” 

“I’m good at what I do and you appreciated that. But it only took a month and a half before we got together. Prior to that, I had stayed after-hours with you a few times to assist you with your thesis and then there was the office party and then just general day-to-day. I often found excuses to make my way down to your office.” 

“So we were in love from the beginning?” 

“I’d say we were attracted to each other, physically and mentally, from day one. It grew pretty rapidly into something more though. I knew very, very early that you were going to be my last-” Lucifer paused in the middle of his statement, the feeling in his stomach not allowing him to go through with saying the phrase with Sam not knowing how intensely he meant it. “That we were going to be something real, something special.” 

The door opened before Sam could respond and Dean and Cas came in from the hallway, followed by the rest of Sam’s family coming back from dinner. 

“We need to talk, Lu,” Cas said firmly before Lucifer could even greet anyone. Lucifer rolled his eyes, looking back at Sam and mouthing, ‘Sounds like I’m in trouble.’ He squeezed Sam’s hand tightly before letting go and making his way out into the hall with his brother, knowing exactly what this conversation was going to be about. 

\-- 

Castiel had Lucifer in with a therapist the very next day, much to Lucifer’s disapproval. But Cas had convinced Sam that it would be best for Lucifer and got Sam to pressure him into it - and Lucifer didn’t have the heart to argue when it came to Sam’s puppy-dog eyes. 

A week later, Lucifer walked into Alighieri Law while facetiming a sleepy Sam. He sat down at his desk in his office, one earbud in and his phone propped up so he could see Sam’s face, and quietly got some paperwork done as Sam read him children’s books with Ellen’s assistance. 

The doctors were optimistic. Sam had retained more of his memory than they originally believed. While he had woken up with conscious memories up to age seven, he had maintained his adult personality traits, suggesting that his memories were right below the surface. 

Like he had so many years before, he picked up on reading easily and fairly quickly. His physical therapy was going well and he was back on his feet with the assistance of a cane and the attribution to Lucifer’s extensive work with him while he was in his coma. And they had all picked up on a new routine: Lucifer still stayed at the hospital overnight while everyone else went back to his home to sleep. Come morning, Bobby would go to work with Dean at the garage, Cas would come into work at the hospital, Ellen and Jo would make their way to Sam’s room, and Lucifer would head to the firm. Lucifer still wasn’t taking on any new cases but there was still plenty to do at the office. He had Sam on video chat every day for the first week he was back at work - both of them continued about their mornings separately but Sam was always there in case Lucifer began to slip. He actually had a few times but Sam’s voice would come through when the younger man began to notice and it would bring him back to reality. He tried a few times to get through the morning without the video but he always ended up with Sam’s face on his phone, gently reminding him that he was okay. Lucifer was becoming less and less of a stranger to Sam and while Sam still didn’t remember their previous relationship, he felt comfortable; in addition, Sam wanted Lucifer to be okay. He felt guilty for the trauma that Lucifer was going through even if his therapist tried to assure him otherwise. 

Other than the constant facetime, Sam’s mornings consisted of talking with his mother and sister, reading books, going through photos and videos, and therapy for his own mental health. Lucifer and Dean would meet Sam back at the hospital after lunch for his P.T., they would all have dinner together, and if Sam was up for it, they chat for a while before everyone except Lucifer made their way out for the night. Lucifer would curl up on the sofa or in the chair by Sam’s bed and read quietly to Sam until the younger man fell asleep. 

* * *

Fifty-nine days after Sam had been shot and twenty-three days after he had woken up, their routine was broken. 

“You have to see this car that was brought in today, Sammy, she is beautiful!” Dean exclaimed as he walked through the door, Lucifer following him. Dean was already unlocking his phone and going to Sam’s bedside as Lucifer shed his suit jacket and tie, greeting Ellen and Jo. There was a brief knock on the door before it opened, the doctor stepping inside. 

“Sam! How are you this afternoon?” 

“Feeling good, Sir.” 

“Good, good. I’ve come to tell you that you finally get your freedom.” 

“What?” Sam asked, voicing the question everyone immediately had. 

“There’s no need for you to stay here anymore. You’ll still have to come in daily for your P.T. but I think it will be good for you to get out of here.” 

“But he still doesn’t have his memory back yet,” Lucifer protested. 

“And this hospital is not an environment conducive to regaining his memories. The best thing to do is resume life as normally as possible - that will be your best bet for getting your life back, Sam.” 

And just like that, they were being told that a nurse would be by with discharge papers. 

 

“I’ve gotta call Cas and see if he can come up here. He should know. Are you excited to come home with us, Sammy?” Dean asked and Sam was grinning ear-to-ear. 

“With you and Cas?” Lucifer questioned, raising an eyebrow. 

“Yeah, with me and Cas. Where else?” 

“He should be coming home with me, Dean.” 

“Says who?” 

“The doctor said he should resume life as normally as possible!” 

“He was living with us before it happened.” 

“That wasn’t his normal life, Dean.” 

“Look, I don’t care. He’s coming home with me.” 

“Dean-” 

“You can’t possibly expect me to just hand my baby brother over to you when he doesn’t even know who you are,” Dean tried and Ellen and Bobby shared a look before sighing. 

“Dean, why don’t you let Sam decide?” Ellen asked carefully. Both men looked at Sam, who turned his attention down to the blanket on his lap instead of the ping-pong conversation happening over him. “Sam, what are you thinking?” Ellen nudged and Sam sighed, chewing on his lower lip for a while before looking up at Dean. 

“Do you think Lucifer loves me?” 

“Wait, what?” 

“Lucifer. Does he love me?” 

“I mean, I..” Dean trailed off, looking across the bed to Lucifer. The man didn’t have a threatening look on his face, urging him to say yes. As a matter of fact, he still looked torn at the idea that Sam would be taken away from him. 

“Dean, can you look me in the eyes and tell me that Lucifer doesn’t love me?” 

“Sam, it’s not that simple.” 

“Can you?” 

“No, Sam, I can’t. He loves you.” 

“Can you tell me that he won’t take care of me?” 

“He will, but-” 

“Dean… I think I should go home with Lucifer,” Sam whispered, feeling awful for the look that fell on his big brother’s face. 

“You don’t even know him, Sam!” 

“I’ve had three weeks to get to know him. And I want.. I want my memories back. And he might be the best way to get them.” 

“Sammy, you can’t.. I’ve just gotten you back, you can’t leave me.” Dean sounded broken and Sam’s face looked stricken. 

“Dean, look at me,” Lucifer started, sighing. “I’m going to regret this, I know, but… look, you’ve been living at my house for two months already. There’s no reason you have to leave. I’m going to need help with Sam anyways, especially if I’m to keep going to work. Everyone is more than welcome to stay at our home for as long as it takes for Sam to get better. Does that sound fair?” 

Dean was quiet, still pouting, but Sam smiled and offered his hand to the lawyer to hold. 

“Thank you, Lucifer.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sam Winchester's going hoooooooome.
> 
> And Dean and Lucifer are eternally shifting from enemies to friends and back to enemies.


	22. It's Your Love That Brings Me Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I mean, at least I warned that it was going to be a while? I started it multiple times, hit a brutal writer's block, rewrote it a million times, and have been too busy with college to give it the attention it deserved. 
> 
> It's the end of the road, guys. 
> 
> Enjoy! xxx

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song mentioned is I'm With You by Vance Joy.  
> The quote near the end is from To Kill a Mockingbird.

“This is where we live?!” Sam exclaimed as Lucifer pulled up to their home. “This is a joke, right?”  


“I’m too eager to have you home to play jokes,” Lucifer defended, rolling his eyes.  


“How did I react the first time I saw it?” Sam asked and a devilish grin spread onto Lucifer’s face.  


“You weren’t really paying attention to your surroundings the first time you came here.”  


“What do you- Oh!” Sam’s cheeks warmed and Lucifer couldn’t help but laugh as put the car in park and got out. He ignored their bags in exchange for going around to the passenger’s side, opening Sam’s door and handing him the cane. “Well, when I realized, what did I say then?”  


“You just kinda panicked and started talking about how it was too big for one person.”  


“It is!”  


“Well, it came in handy, didn’t it? Five people have been living here while I was in the hospital with you and now there’s going to be seven of us - at least until your family goes back to Kansas.”  


“Did you do that the first time?”  


“Do what?”  


“Make excuses.”  


“You bet your ass I did. I bought a big beautiful house because I damn well wanted to,” Lucifer said with a grin, giving him the same answer as he had almost a year prior. Sam smiled, gripping tightly to his cane and slowly making his way to the front door. It opened before they got there and Dean stepped out, enjoying the look of amazement on his baby brother’s face. The last homes Sam remembered were a string of shitty motel rooms that consisted of peeling wallpaper and mysterious stains. And while Dean personally thought that Lucifer’s place was obnoxious as hell, it made him happy to think about how Sam was mentally going from one extreme to the other.  


“Welcome back to your not-so-humble abode,” Dean greeted when they got close enough, smirking slightly. “Where Lucifer will be quick to tell you that the house is one-hundred percent paid for and hope that you forget that annual property taxes, utilities, and upkeep still leave him with monthly payments,” he snarked, glancing pointedly in Lucifer’s direction. Sam had asked after agreeing to move in with Lucifer about monthly costs, informing him that he wanted to at least pitch in. Lucifer had tried to get away with telling him that the house was paid for and even though Sam was far smarter than that, Lucifer made it very clear that he wouldn’t be accepting a dime from the man. He had told Sam to save it and they eventually ended up on a compromise that Sam would take over paying back his student loans and wouldn’t concern himself with the cost of living. But despite the accusatory remark, Sam didn’t question. He still seemed to be in shock, which Lucifer found adorable.  


“I’d ask for a tour but I don’t think I can walk that much,” Sam finally admitted, looking over at Lucifer.  


“Well we’ll let you know where the most important things are and you can worry about the rest later, yeah?” Lucifer assured, leading Sam inside. It was like the first time all over again, Sam taking the time to gawk over his surroundings. And, as promised, Lucifer showed Sam how to get to the most important spots. He started in the master bedroom and ensuite, then walked him to the rooms that his family members were staying in. He paused at an empty guest room and knocked his knuckles against the door. “I’ll uh, be in here. Close enough that you should be able to get to me rather easily if you need it and I can get to you.”  


“We don’t sleep in the same room?”  


“Well, I mean, we typically do. But I figured you might want to have some space to yourself.. I don’t want to push, you know? I want you to feel comfortable.”  


“You should at least take that other room then! It’s your house, you shouldn’t have to sleep in another-”  


“It’s _our_ house and I’m just following doctor’s orders, Sammy. As close to your normal routine as possible.”  


Lucifer won that round but only because Sam wasn’t sure if he was allowed to tell the handsome man that he would’ve been okay with sharing a bed. 

\--

As a result of Sam finally coming home, Lucifer ended up taking more time off. He was more productive this time around though, getting work done in his home office, but his main focus was getting Sam settled back into a routine. Mornings consisted of breakfast with everyone and then Dean, Bobby, and Castiel went to work while everyone else stayed with Sam. They read books, they told stories, watched movies, whatever it was that Sam wanted to do. Dean and Bobby came home after lunchtime and they’d all head to the hospital for therapy. They’d all have dinner together and Sam would stay up for a bit longer before going to bed. All in all, the days functioned relatively smoothly minus one small problem:  


Lucifer couldn’t sleep.  


The last time he had slept without being in the same room as Sam, they had been broken up and Lucifer had been using copious amounts of alcohol to put himself to sleep each night. Now he just lied awake, staring at the ceiling until it was time to start on breakfast. Which resulted in him typically falling asleep right after they ate, curled up in an armchair as Sam read quietly or even having his head fall slowly onto Sam’s shoulder as they watched a movie.  


Ellen, Bobby, and Jo stayed for a week after Sam came back home before making the ultimate decision to head back to Kansas. It was a tearful goodbye and Lucifer hugged Ellen and Jo, promising them that he’d have them on the next flight out to California whenever their hearts desired. And it was when Dean and Cas left to drive them to the airport that Sam turned to Lucifer, biting his lower lip.  


“Why aren’t you sleeping at night?”  


“What? Of course I am.”  


“I thought you said we don’t lie to each other,” Sam answered with a deep-set frown. Lucifer sighed and rubbed the back of his neck.  


“We don’t, Sam. And I… I’m not used to sleeping without you. Even while you were in your coma, I typically slept in the bed with you and if not, then in a chair pulled up to the bed.”  


“So you would sleep better if you slept in our bedroom with me?”  


“I don’t want you to feel pressured to accommodate me, Sam. It’s fine if you don’t want me in there.”  


“You can.”  


“..What?”  


“You can sleep in there with me. There’s no harm in it.”  


And that night, back in his own bed with Sam lying two feet away, Lucifer got the best sleep he’d had since Sam left him.

\--

A few days later, Sam and Lucifer were finally alone in their home again. Sam had actually been the one to urge Dean and Castiel to go home, telling them that they deserved to continue their lives as normal just like he was supposed to do. It still took Dean some time to feel comfortable leaving and even then, he had made Sam promise to call him if he felt uncomfortable for even a second - whether he was at work or asleep or anything in-between.  


The first few minutes that they were alone together were… awkward, to say the least. Had it been a few months ago, prior to the shooting, prior to the breakup, having time alone for the first time in ages would’ve resulted in practically ravishing each other the second the door closed. But now, this time? The two of them hadn’t done anything more than hold hands since Sam had woken up. And now, with the absence of loud hospital machines, nurses coming in and out, and five other people always nearby, it was deafeningly silent as they prepared for bed.  


Lucifer retrieved Sam’s handful of nightly pills and the materials necessary for checking Sam’s sugar. While Sam had ample time to heal while in his coma, there was no amount of sleep that could reverse the effects of his missing and damaged organs. With the nightly medical routine finished, the overhead light was turned off in favor of their bedside lamps and they both got in on their respective sides, leaving plenty of room between the two of them.  


“Do you want to read?” Lucifer asked softly, having gotten used to assisting Sam in reading a chapter aloud or, if Sam was too tired, reading one aloud to Sam, before going to bed. The man yawned though and shook his head.  


“Think I’m just gonna go to sleep tonight,” he murmured in response, pulling on the blankets.  


“Goodnight then, Sam. I love you.” Lucifer had made the conscious decision that despite the fact that Sam didn’t remember their time together that he would not stop declaring his love for the man. If Sam didn’t say it made him uncomfortable, Lucifer was content to remind him whenever necessary. He was keeping his hands to himself and refraining from making comments that might feel as if he were pressuring Sam into something (and he avoided the last first kiss title like the plague) but Sam Winchester would know that he loved him, no matter what.  


Lucifer grabbed the three case files that were sitting on his nightstand along with a pen and a highlighter, beginning to slowly read through them.  


“Is that work stuff?” Sam asked after a while.  


“Yeah. Am I bothering you? I can turn off my light.”  


“No, you’re fine… What do you do, as a lawyer?”  


“That’s a big question.”  


“I’m curious.”  


“Well, I’ve done a lot of different things with my law career. Straight out of school, I worked as a prosecutor and that means that I was the one telling the judges that a criminal should go to jail,” he explained, oversimplifying it immensely. “I worked my way up and did a term as the state district attorney - it’s like the top prosecutor of a state - but it was more political than I wanted. It only took a handful of death penalty cases before I was done. I turned towards defense work after that, became partner of a firm before deciding to start my own. And Alighieri Law was born. So now I’m the one telling the judge that someone _shouldn’t_ go to jail,” he explained. Sam got a kick out of the change and laughed quietly.  


“So should they go to jail or not?”  


“Well, our entire careers are _currently_ based off of 'not.'”  


“Even if they’ve done bad things?”  


“If it’s extremely clear that they’ve done the bad thing, then I make sure that the prosecution stays within their limits and doesn’t violate my client’s rights.”  


“I do that too?”  


“As an intern in a defense office, yeah, you do. But it’s just your stepping stone - granted, you’ll be doing it in the future too, but in a different way.”  


“What does that mean?”  


“It means that you have bigger goals.”  


“Like what?”  


“You want to defend children who need your help,” Lucifer explained. Sam nodded, growing quiet for a minute and thinking about what Lucifer said.  


“Like the kind of help I needed when I was little? And Dean?”  


“Exactly like that,” Lucifer confirmed.  


“Oh.” Sam took a long pause. “What about now? What am I going to do now?”  


“What do you mean?”  


“I can’t be a lawyer now, can I? Where can I get a job now?”  


“We’re staying optimistic, Sam. You’ll have your memory back and be kicking ass in the courtroom before you know it.”  


“But what if I don’t remember?” Sam asked, distressed. His hands found his hair and he tugged at the long strands, rocking a bit. Lucifer frowned - he had never seen this behavior out of Sam before the incident but now it had appeared rather often. Even when Sam was stressed beyond relief, he hadn’t reacted like this. Lucifer wondered if it was something he had grown out of as a child and had resulted back to now with the trauma.  


“If you don’t,” Lucifer started slowly, gently moving Sam’s hands away from his hair. “If you don’t, then we’ll figure out where to go from here after you’re physically better. Okay?” Lucifer didn’t want to face the realities of that possibility right now. “You’re going to be okay. Sam, you have a really big support group here for you. We’ll figure it out.” 

* * *

Lucifer started to try everything he could think of. He took Sam back to their favorite restaurants and restaurants that they had celebrated big moments in, to Sam’s favorite museum, to the mom and pop bookstore he loved, to the library on campus that Sam had spent many, many hours in throughout the years; Lucifer managed to take him back to the apartment he had lived in with Dean and even took him to Castiel’s with the small sliver of hope that perhaps it could help trigger _something_. Lucifer showed him news reports of their ‘scandal’ and then their response, he played footage from the courtroom; they’d watch reruns of their favorite shows and Sam would make similar comments to the ones he had made the very first time he’d seen it, signaling that there had to be something right below the surface, but in the end, it still didn’t work.  


With permission from Sam’s therapist, he even took him back to Alighieri Law. They went late one evening, where the risk of Sam being flocked by well-wishers was minimized, and he walked Sam around. He started in the intern’s office and had Sam sit down at his desk and go through things there - it hadn’t been touched other than to retrieve Sam’s active files for them to be reassigned. Lucifer was practically jittering with anticipation and nerves - Sam had to remember. If not because of this office then Lucifer’s office had to trigger memories. He was so convinced that it was going to work that he even got nervous about how to handle it if the first thing that came back to Sam was the shooting.  


They got back in the elevator - because the flight of stairs up to Lucifer’s office wasn’t the best idea for Sam - before Lucifer carefully ushered him out and into his office, practically bubbling.  


But.  


Nothing.  


Happened.  


The evening ended with Lucifer ushering a distressed Sam back into the car while pretending that he himself was still optimistic. And if Lucifer found the bottom of a bottle later that night after Sam fell asleep, he definitely made sure to ditch the evidence before crawling into bed beside a sleeping Sam. 

\--

“How long are we going to keep trying this?” Sam demanded one night from the passenger’s seat. They had just left physical therapy and it had been clear that the younger man had been distressed while they were there. Lucifer had assumed it had been because the therapist had been pushing Sam particularly hard today but it was now clear that there was something else going on.  


“Trying what?”  


“How long are we going to keep pretending like I’m going to wake up normal? Because I’m not. It’s time to give up.”  


“I’m not giving up on you, Sam.”  


“I just need to go back to Dean’s,” Sam muttered.  


Lucifer’s blood ran cold and he glanced over at the other man briefly, seeing that he was staring out of the window now. He looked so collected for someone who had just shoved his hand into Lucifer’s ribcage and pulled his heart out.  


“I’m not keeping you with me against your will, Sam. I thought we made it clear that you are free to leave whenever you so choose.”  


“I can’t give you what you want, Lucifer. I can’t. I’m attracted to you but I.. I can’t give you the relationship you want. You’re always going to be looking at me like you’re waiting for something and I can’t give you an answer. You’re asking for a _lifetime_ of that panic felt when you forget a birthday or an anniversary. There’s so much gone and I can’t fix it,” Sam explained. As he was talking, Lucifer had found a place to pull over so he could look at him.  


“Sam, I am so sorry if I have placed an unthinkable amount of pressure on you. I just… I love you, Sam. I love you and I want to be with you and I want you to want to be with me. But I’m not going to make you. I will wait to the end of times for you, Sam. If I can’t have your love, I’d be fine with your friendship. But if you want to leave, my love, I will help you pack your belongings and I will take you to Dean’s.”  


Sam was quiet for a long time, carefully wiping tears as they slowly slid down his cheeks. Lucifer handed him tissues but didn’t touch him otherwise.  


“Give up on me. Please. This would be so much easier if you would just give up,” Sam finally muttered.  


“I told you: I’m never giving up on you, Samuel,” Lucifer said firmly, finding Sam’s hand and squeezing. “We don’t give up on each other.”  


“We did once.”  


“You gave up on me because I wasn’t deserving of your attempts. I will spend the rest of my days trying to make up for that.”  


“You have.”  


“I haven’t, Sam. You would’ve never been in my office if I hadn’t fucked everything up,” Lucifer reminded, sighing.  


“I probably would have, you know,” Sam said after a beat or two of silence. “If we hadn’t broken up, I’d have every reason to be in your office, right? We were over and I went up on my own accord - to yell at you, right? You can’t blame yourself for me being there. You can’t blame yourself for me getting shot. Because you’ve told me the stories and I’ve seen the footage. I’ve watched that footage over and over and over and it definitely looks like everything that happened that morning happened on my own accord.”  


“We will always view that morning differently, Sam. Always. But for now… Do you want me to take you to Dean’s?”  


There was a pregnant pause, the air in the car thick with anxiety.  


“No… No, I’ll go back home. With you.”

* * *

“It’s probably going to be a pretty full day for me at the office today, okay? But if you need anything, you call me. I’ll answer no matter what I’m doing. And Dean and Castiel are available to you as well,” Lucifer reminded Sam for probably the tenth time as he dried their breakfast dishes.  


“You’re a lot more worried about today than I am,” Sam pointed out from his seat at the breakfast bar. “I’m going to be fine,” he assured, his fingers tapping along to the beat of the quiet music in the background. Lucifer had taught him how to select music on his phone and have it play on the speakers in various rooms of the house. He had liked the access to music but found he also had no clue what to play, so Lucifer had put Sam’s entire list of music on shuffle and each choice seemed to be successful so far.  


“I don’t like the idea of leaving you alone all day.”  


“I’m a big boy. I think I can handle it,” he assured him.  


Lucifer rolled his eyes and poured from the pot of coffee into his travel mug, listening as one song ended and another began. 

‘I saw you standing there,  
Sandy blond hair-’

Lucifer tensed ever so slightly before going over to Sam’s phone in order to skip the song.  


“Lucifer? Do we dance?” Sam asked before he could hit the next button.  


“Why do you ask?” Lucifer questioned, looking at him with wide eyes .  


“I just… it sounds like a good song to dance to. Do we?” Sam asked and Lucifer was quiet for a few moments before nodding very slowly.  


“We do. We dance to this song,” he confirmed quietly, watching as Sam got up and came over to him. 

_“I don’t think it’s fair that I’m cooking breakfast and still have to suffer with your music choices,” Lucifer whined as Sam wirelessly connected his phone to the speakers._

_“How you can go from basking in the afterglow to complaining so quickly, I will never understand,” Sam shot back, preparing two mugs of coffee._

_‘I saw you standing there,  
sandy blond hair-’_

_“Lu, dance with me,” Sam said as a song began to play, grabbing the man’s arm.  
_

_“I don’t dance, Winchester.”_

_‘-I was just coasting ‘til we met,  
you remind me just how good it can get-’ _

_“You do now, to this song only. I will never make you dance to anything else.”_  


_“Look at you, picking out a wedding song so nonchalantly,” Lucifer pointed out, earning himself a smack on the arm._  


_“I’m serious!” Sam claimed, giving Lucifer his puppy dog eyes. It had Lucifer setting down the spatula in his hand and wrapping his arms around the man with a sigh._

_‘Well I've been on fire, dreaming of you_  
_Tell me you don't ___  
_It feels like you do_  
_Looking like that, you'll open some wounds_  
_How does it start?_  
_And when does it end?_  
_Only been here for a moment, but I know I want you_  
_But is it too soon?_  
_To know that I'm with you_  
_There's nothing I can do’_

____

_The next few minutes found the two men moving about the kitchen, eyes locked as Lucifer listened to the words of the song for the first time. And as the song ended, Sam’s grip on Lucifer tightened._  


_“‘There’s nothing I won’t do… Oh darling, I’m with you,’” Sam sang in a whispered, kissing the man in front of him. When they finally came up for air, Lucifer pursed his lips._  


_“At least you used your one song on a good one,” Lucifer pointed out, beginning to grin as Sam laughed and pushed him away._

 

Their frames melded together in the most intimate embrace they had since Sam had woken up and everything so inherently _Sam_ flooded Lucifer’s senses - the weight of his large hands on Lucifer’s waist, the scent of his shampoo, the feeling of his hair tickling his skin. Lucifer closed his eyes, finding that his entire body was trembling by the time the song came to an end. And because Sam didn’t do it, Lucifer tightened his grip on Sam and whispered:  


“‘There’s nothing I won’t do… Oh darling, I’m with you.’” 

Sam’s head jerked up, eyes wide, but Lucifer was already pulling away with a fresh burst of panicked misery, snatching his keys off of the counter.  


“I’ve got to get to work, Sam. I’ll be back this evening,” Lucifer called as he rushed out of the door and into the car. Sam followed, opening his mouth but finding that there were no words coming out. He moved as quickly as he was able, but merely watched as Lucifer sped off with a squeal of the tires, leaving Sam staring out at nothing for a few shell-shocked moments before he found his phone. He called Dean first and when there was no answer, he began to type. 

[To: Castiel]  
I need you to come and pick me up. Please. SW 

Are you okay? Where are you? CA

Home. Please come. SW 

I’m on the way. CA

Castiel called Dean as he made his way out to the car, sighing when the man didn’t pick up and calling the shop. It took a few minutes, but he finally heard the other’s voice on the other end of the line.  


“Hello, Dean. Is there any way you could meet me back at home?”  


“What? Why?”  


“I’m not sure exactly. Sam has texted me to ask me to come and get him. Hopefully I’m overreacting but I’d like to have you there when I get back to the house with him.”  


“I swear to God, Cas, I don’t care if Lucifer’s your brother, if he-”  


“Let’s wait until we know what’s going on, Dean.”  


“...fine. I’ll wrap up here and be on the way.” 

Sam was sitting on the porch when Castiel pulled up and the first thing that the surgeon noticed was that he seemed physically fine. That helped calm him as he watched Sam slowly make his way to the passenger’s side of his car and get in, staying silent.  


“Sam?”  


The man didn’t respond to him, just buckled his seatbelt and stared out the window.  


“Sam, are you okay? Did Lucifer do something to you?” Castiel asked and Sam didn’t verbally answer but shook his head. The younger man seemed to be in an almost catatonic state and Castiel sighed, making his way back home and hoping Dean wouldn’t take too long. 

Once Sam was sitting down inside, Castiel set about making the man tea, wanting to help but assuming that Sam wasn’t going to talk unless Dean was there.  


“I just want you to know that you’re more than welcome to stay here, Sam. We have a bedroom waiting-” Cas started as he handed over the mug of tea.  


“I remember.”  


“...Excuse me?”  


“My memories are back.”  


“Does Lucifer know?”  


Sam finally started explaining how they had spent the morning and how Lucifer had danced with him per his request and how Lucifer’s repetition of the last lines of the song had triggered the floodgates.  


“And you didn’t tell him?”  


“He was rushing off.”  


“Then you should’ve said it over him talking.”  


“I couldn’t.”  


“Then you should’ve called _him_.”  


“I panicked.”  


Castiel stood up, taking a few steps away from Sam and the situation, trying to calm himself down. Dean came in right then, calling out for his little brother but finding Castiel instead, a distressed look on his face.  


“Cas? What’s wrong? What did Lucifer do to him?”  


“Lucifer didn’t do anything. I’m trying not to harm your brother.”  


“What? Why?” Dean demanded, moving past Cas in order to get to find Sammy. “Sam, what’s going on? Whose ass do I have to kick this time?” He asked, not understanding why Castiel was upset with Sam. His younger brother looked distressed as it was.  


“Dean, I remember,” Sam whispered and Dean continued to stare at him with a concerned look for a moment before the words hit him and his eyes grew wide.  


“You… everything?”  


“Everything,” Sam confirmed, his voice breaking. Dean immediately wrapped his arms around his brother, pulling him in tightly.  


“Hey, hey, this is a good thing, Sammy. It’s a good thing,” Dean promised, rubbing circles on Sam’s back.  


“He was going to kill him, Dean. I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I know I upset everybody but he was going to kill him,” Sam mumbled repeatedly and Dean watched over Sam’s shoulder as Castiel’s resolve broke. Cas came to sit on the other side of Sam, sighing.  


“But he didn’t because you were a selfless idiot who jumped in front of him,” Dean reminded.  


“He was going to kill him!”  


“And he almost killed you instead,” Dean shot back, letting go of his brother. “But both of you are alive and doing as well as can be expected. Do you want me to call Lucifer? I won’t give up until I get an answer. It must’ve been fucking terrifying to get your memories back when you were all alone.”  


Cas cleared his throat pointedly and Dean raised an eyebrow at him before looking at Sam.  


“He was there when I remembered,” Sam admitted.  


“And the bastard just left anyways?” Dean demanded and Sam sighed, shaking his head.  


“No. He rushed off for work and I could’ve said it but I didn’t. I didn’t tell him and that’s why Cas is mad at me.”  


“I’m not mad at you, Sam, I’m disappointed. Lucifer has moved mountains for you in the last few months and he deserved to be the first person to know,” Castiel pointed out carefully.  


“Let’s take a second though, Cas. Sam, do you even want to be with the guy? Because I know that the reasoning behind the break-up in the first place has been downplayed. You don’t have to stay with him just because you got emotional when a gun was pointed at you. It doesn’t change anything,” Dean said, reminding everyone of the situation at hand. Sam was quiet for a long time, staring at the wall over Dean’s shoulder, and Cas and Dean kept sharing concerned looks as the silence continued.  


“Sam? Sam, are you with us?” Castiel finally asked, slightly worried that Sam could be sent into a full-blown catatonic state. His memory coming back was wonderful but it was also the equivalent of a brutal assault on his brain. Sam nodded slightly, but didn’t speak. “Sam, do you remember the question?” Sam nodded again and both of the men relaxed a bit. “Do you want to try again with Lucifer?”  


“He stayed in that hospital room every single day, while I was in the coma?” Sam finally broke his silence to ask.  


“Couldn’t even be forced out. He bathed you and did physical therapy with you multiple times a day. He read to you all the damn time, even got pretty close with Ma and Jo,” Dean confirmed.  


“And since we’ve been home, he’s… Are you going to be mad at me if I want to stay with him?”  


“No, Sammy, I won’t be mad. Not if he treats you well,” Dean assured. In the end, he wasn’t fond of Lucifer, but the man was crazy about his little brother. So when Sam didn’t respond, Dean nudged him a bit. “Sam? What are you thinking?”  


“I’m thinking that a love like this… it’s rare. Isn’t it?” Sam asked and Dean locked eyes with Cas over Sam’s shoulder, nodding.  


“Yeah, Sam, it’s rare,” Dean confirmed.  


“I can’t give up on this, on him.”  


“That’s fine, Sam,” Castiel told him, placing a hand on Sam’s shoulder. “You don’t have to end it.”  


Sam didn’t answer, but merely stared at the wall. They were less concerned this time, as it was evident that there were gears turning in Sam’s head.  


“Whatcha thinking, Sammy?”  


“You approve of him? You approve of me being with him?” Sam asked again, needing that confirmation.  


“The son of a bitch pisses me off at least twice a week. But Cas is right - he’s moved mountains for you. I can’t say that I don’t approve of a guy who would do anything for you.”  


“Then… Then I’m thinking that I’m going to need some help.”

* * *

“Hello! How can I help you, Sir? Are you here for Mr. Alighieri?” A chipper redhead greeted Sam that evening when he stepped out of the elevator, now dressed in his work clothes. “I’m afraid he’s about to take off for the night - is he expecting you?” Despite the kind girl talking to him, it sent a pang through his chest not to see Meg sitting there giving him a smirk.  


“He’s not but I’m the one he’s about to rush off to come see,” Sam explained and she gave him a confused look. “I’m Sam Winchester,” he clarified, holding a hand out to her. She hadn’t known his face but his name was enough, as her eyes grew wide and she came out from around the desk in order to take his hand.  


“Mr. Winchester, of course. My apologies. I was told it would be quite some time before I would be meeting you - I wasn’t aware you were back!”  


“I’m not. I’m just here to see Lucifer,” he said, a little on edge at her reaction. He wouldn’t be able to handle it if people were going to start treating him like that - and she didn’t even know him.  


“Yes, yes of course, I’ll let him know that-”  


“No need, I promise. He’s not in with a client, correct?”  


“All clear, Mr. Winchester!”  


Sam nodded, giving her a curt smile before going to Lucifer’s door. He paused for a moment, seeing that it wasn’t the same as before. He obviously hadn’t noticed the differences when Lucifer had brought him up to test his memory but now, as he opened the door, he realized how the entire office had been done over. The sight of it made his breath catch and he stood there, dumbfounded for a moment, forgetting the reason he had come in the first place.  


“Sam? Sam, what are you doing here? How did you get here?” Lucifer questioned, getting up from his desk and coming over to him once he realized who had just rudely come into his office without knocking. When he noticed that Sam wasn’t answering his questions, he paused. “Sam, are you okay?” He asked carefully.  


Sam tightly shut his eyes, taking a moment before opening them and nodding.  


“I’m good. I’m okay. I… I had Dean drop me off.”  


“Is everything okay?”  


“Yeah, everything’s fine, I just-”  


“Wait!” Lucifer interrupted, taking a step back and staring at Sam with wide eyes. “You reacted to being back in here. You didn’t… last time, you... Sam, are you.. Did you-” he tried and Sam nodded when Lucifer couldn’t get the words out.  


“Hey babe,” Sam said softly, causing Lucifer to cry out. He lifted his wrist to his mouth, shaking his head slightly and taking a few steps backwards. Every PTSD attack he had suffered from occured in this room and now, while he wasn’t reliving the misery of losing Sam, this hallucination could easily be considered worse.  


“Lu, I’m here. I’m right here. I’m going to touch your shoulder, okay?” Sam warned before gently placing his hand on Lucifer’s right shoulder. “Do you feel that? I’m here, Lucifer. It’s me,” he promised. Lucifer looked up at him now, locking eyes, and Sam smiled. “That’s it. I’m right here. It’s me,” he whispered softly, wiping tears.  


“You remember me?”  


“Yes.”  


It took that one three-lettered word to make Lucifer’s arms wrap tightly around Sam, burying his face in Sam’s neck as he tried to remember he still had to be gentle with him.  


“And you still… Do you still want to be with me, now that you remember?” Lucifer asked nervously after a moment, lifting his head but not letting go.  


“If you’ll have me.” Sam’s answer made Lucifer laugh and Sam smiled back in response, tightening his hold on Lucifer’s hips.  


“What made you remember?”  


“‘There’s nothing I won’t do,’” Sam whispered in a sing-song voice.  


“You’ve known all day and you’re only telling me this now?”  


“I’ve been busy!” Sam defended, lifting a hand to cup Lucifer’s cheek.  


“What could you have possibly been busy with?”  


“I had our brothers help me go purchase something.”  


“You went shopping instead of- Sam!”  


Sam had pulled a black velvet box out of his jacket pocket with the attempt to interrupt Lucifer - and had done exactly that.  


“I hope you understand that I can’t exactly kneel down, as I will never be able to get up,” he started, smiling until he realized Lucifer was backing away from him.  


“Why?” Lucifer asked, looking almost hurt.  


“‘With you, life is routine. Without you, life is unbearable,’” Sam quoted, hoping Lucifer would find the answer amusing. However, it had no such effect.  


“I’ve read that damn book to you enough times that I can quote it in my sleep and you think it will help you fake a proposal?”  


“ _Fake_ a proposal? What do you mean, _fake a proposal_?” Sam asked, confused now as he held the unopened box in his hands.  


“You’re angry with me. You’re angry that I treated you badly, you’re angry that I provoked Michael or that I had the nerve to stay with you in the hospital. You’re just angry at me and you’re trying to get back at me. Fake a proposal and then rip it all from me,” Lucifer accused and Sam’s heart broke. He put the box back in his pocket and stepped forward, reaching for Lucifer’s hand.  


“I need you to stop thinking that you aren’t worthy of having good things happen to you,” he whispered to the older man. “Because you are. And yeah, we broke up. But it was because you were ignoring me and when I did get your attention, it wasn’t positive. I think you’ve made up for that with months of your undivided attention. Hell, I definitely owe you at this point.”  


“I was just trying… I was being a good person.”  


“No. A good person would’ve come to visit me every now and then and checked in on me after I woke up. You were devoted to my wellbeing, Lucifer. So if your answer is no because you don’t want to, that’s fine. I understand. But if your answer is no because you don’t think you deserve it or you think I feel pressured into this, we have a problem.”  


“I’m not saying no,” Lucifer rushed to say and Sam smiled, tracing the pad of his thumb over Lucifer’s cheekbone. “Aren’t you the one who said that we moved in together too fast?”  


“I am. And what did you tell me?”  


“Probably whatever it took to get you to say yes,” Lucifer admitted with a small smile.  


“You told me you knew that I was your forever and why bother waiting with forever. And personally, I think that after everything, we know better than anybody that life is short. I always thought that saying was stupid, you know? Because life is the longest thing we ever take part in. But near death experiences and months of amnesia really puts things into perspective,” Sam explained and Lucifer paused for a moment.  


“Life is short, so let’s get married?” Lucifer asked, questioning Sam’s logic. The younger man nodded and pulled the box back out, opening it for the first time to reveal the ring.  


“I had it engraved,” Sam explained, pulling it out of the box and handing it over. Lucifer raised an eyebrow but tilted the ring until the light hit the inner circle to reveal _My Last First Kiss_ engraved in a beautiful script.  


Lucifer dropped the ring in favor of wrapping his arms around Sam, kissing him for the first time in months.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe it's over! There's an epilogue coming (and it's already almost done, so I promise it won't be very long this time around) and I have a few drabble ideas, so I guess it's not completely over. Be on the lookout! 
> 
> Let me know your thoughts!


	23. Epilogue - What Comes Next, Winchester?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Last First Kiss has been in the works since around February and the first chapter was uploaded at the end of June - it's hard to believe that it's officially over. 
> 
> Enjoy! xxx

_[Three years later]_

Sam dialed Castiel’s number for the third time, muttering to himself about answering the phone as he watched the paramedics move the gurney into the back of the ambulance. Right before going to voicemail again, the phone stopped ringing. 

“Sam? What is going on? I’m at dinner with-” 

“I need you to meet me at the hospital.” 

“What? Why?” 

“I have a two-year-old girl that needs your help.” 

“How have you gotten to her before the- Sam, we’ve all discussed this, it isn’t safe for you to-” 

“Yell at me, later, Cas. She’s going to need you,” Sam muttered, hanging up. 

Sam turned to Jody, the social worker who brought him to the scene, and gestured towards the ambulance. 

“Let’s go.” 

As Sam followed the paramedics pushing the gurney into the emergency room, he heard his name being yelled. He ignored it in favor of going with the little girl as far as he could before turning back around and seeking out his brother. 

“Hey Dean. Sorry I interrupted your dinner, I mean, my dinner was kinda interrupted too and-” 

“I don’t give a shit about dinner, Sam. Look at you,” Dean complained as he went to the nurses station for tissues to clean the dried blood from Sam’s nose. “Look, this part is not in your job description, Sam. You’ve gotta leave this up to the cops.” 

“I was having dinner with Jody when she got the call, Dean. Domestic disturbance, police were told a child was involved, could she meet them at the scene. I wasn’t going to let her go alone and we ended up getting there before the cops did. I couldn’t just stand out there and listen, Dean. Had I waited, that girl could be dead!” Sam defended. 

Sam had taken his own advice about life being short and had chosen not to go back to Alighieri Law. Instead, with Lucifer’s assistance, he had opened up his own nonprofit defense agency for children. He worked closely with Child Protection Services, which had gotten him in some pretty sticky situations - and as a result, had pissed off his loved ones. But he’d much rather have an angry man trying to beat _him_ instead of a helpless kid. 

“Sam, you’re going to be in the wrong place at the wrong time one day with this shit. You have to-” Dean was cut off by the sound of Sam’s phone ringing and the younger man looked relieved as he slipped his phone out of his pocket. 

“Sorry, gotta take this!” Sam excused, leaving his brother there to grumble as he walked down the hall, answering the call. 

“Hey Lu,” Sam greeted. “Sorry, I know I planned on being home by now but something came up.” 

“Something like…?” Lucifer probed. 

“Well, I’m at the hospital and I’m waiting to see how this little girl-” 

“Samuel William Winchester-Alighieri, you _didn’t_. Really?” His husband did not sound amused. 

“I did not deserve middle _and_ hyphenated names. What I did was necessary given the circumstances.” 

“And reprimanding you with your full name was necessary given the circumstances. But are you okay?” 

“Pretty sure my nose is broken. But Cas ended up dragging Dean with him so he’s doing his grumpy big brother thing. I’m fine.” 

“I’m coming down there.” 

“You really don’t have to. Jody and I are going to have to sit down with the cops while we’re here, give a statement.” 

“And pray that you don’t get charged for trespassing? Or assault?” Lucifer asked dryly. Sam looked down at his bloody knuckles, almost amused at how well the man on the line knew him. 

“Crime of necessity, babe.” 

“I’m on my way,” Lucifer muttered. 

“I love you.” 

“You better.” 

\-- 

Despite how nonchalant he was able to be with Dean and Lucifer, the second that he found himself alone, he leaned against the wall, trying desperately to breathe as his chest tightened. He didn’t regret going in there but the mother had been DOA and the child… well, Sam had known that whichever surgeon was at the hospital wasn’t going to be enough. The extent of the child’s injuries was something that only the patience and steady hands of Castiel could handle. So he let himself take a few minutes to collect himself before seeking out Jody and then the cops to find a private area to talk. Sam was writing down his statement when Jody nudged him. 

“Your lawyer’s out there,” she told him with a smirk. 

“You didn’t have to call your lawyer. You’re not in trouble. Man’s looking at a death sentence - a judge would laugh him out of the courtroom if he tried to sue you,” one of the officer’s piped up. Sam vaguely knew the officers from previous interactions, so their conversation hadn’t been too formal. Sam glanced up, looking at the window at the door before rolling his eyes. 

“I didn’t call my lawyer - I called my husband. My husband just happens to be a lawyer - I’m married to Lucifer Alighieri,” Sam explained, shooing his husband off with a gesture. The officer nodded in realization - and his eyes had widened slightly in recognition - before Sam got back to writing. 

Once they were finally finished, Sam sought out Dean and Lucifer, whom he found in a private waiting room. 

“You’re an idiot,” Lucifer greeted, getting to his feet. He took Sam’s face into both of his hands, inspecting him for a moment before kissing him softly. “A fucking idiot.” 

“I love you too,” Sam promised, hands finding Lucifer’s hips. “I’m fine. I promise,” he murmured before leading him back to the chairs, ending the fight before it could start. 

 

Castiel joined another hour later, in hospital-issued surgical scrubs, and pulled the strings of his hat, tugging it off. 

“It was touch-and-go there for a bit but she’s a fighter. There was some pretty bad internal bleeding. I hate to say it, but it’s good that you got to her when you did,” Cas announced. 

“Don’t encourage him, Cassie,” Lucifer chided and Sam merely pulled the man in closer to his side. 

“What happens now? For the kid?” Dean asked and Sam and Jody shared a look. 

“Grace’s mom didn’t make it and there’s no way she’ll be put back with her dad. We went through files with the cops but we only found a grandparent and they can’t take her. We’ll keep looking but if nobody turns up…” Jody trailed off and Sam sighed. 

“Then Jody and I take over her case,” Sam finished. “Cas, how long do we have before she’s out of the hospital?” 

“It’s going to take a while. You’ll have a bit of time,” Cas confirmed. “In the meantime, I think it’s time for everybody to go home and go to bed.” 

* * *

While Sam cared about Grace’s case, finding a relative was Jody’s job. He didn’t get much time to focus on Grace in the next week - he had a list of cases in addition to his own side project that he was working on. 

So with that, Grace’s first visitor that wasn’t hospital staff or CPS was Dean. 

 

Dean stepped out of the elevator on the pediatrics floor and glanced at the clock before looking around. He finally looked over at the nurse’s station and raised an eyebrow. 

“Hey Charlie, you seen a surgeon in Mr. Incredible scrubs? Yea high, messy hair, blue eyes?” 

“Yeah, Elastigirl, Dr. Winchester is in with a patient. He’ll be all yours soon enough,” the nurse answered with a smirk. 

“Why do I have the feeling that’s not the first time you’ve called me that today?” Dean asked, leaning against the counter as he spoke. 

“The jokes started the second he walked in the door this morning,” Charlie confirmed with a smirk. 

“Unfortunately,” a deep voice chimed in from behind him. Dean turned around, smiling at the sight of the man. 

“I’ll be your Elastigirl anyday, Doc,” Dean told him with a wink, earning himself a look. 

“I just have one more patient to check on and then we can go. It’s actually Grace, the little one that your brother brought in.” 

“Yeah, how is she?” 

“She’s a fighter. I’m sure she’d like to see a new face, if you’d like to join me.” 

Dean agreed and as soon as Cas turned his back to head to the room, quickly pocketed a blue-raspberry sucker from the candy jar hidden behind the desk before following him. 

In the room, there was a toddler snuggled under a Toy Story blanket with a tiny bright blue cast on her arm and a large fading bruise on her cheek. She had a head full of blonde curls and when she looked up at the two men entering the room, Dean saw that her eyes were a shade of blue that could only be matched by the man in front of him. 

“Hi Gracie,” Cas said softly, going over to her. “I just wanted to see how you were doing today. Do you want some company for a minute?” 

The little girl nodded her head. 

“Good. This is my husband, Dean. He’s really nice - do you want to say hi?” 

“Hi Dee,” she said, looking over at him. “Dirty,” she added, pointing to his jeans. Indeed, there were streaks of black grease on his jeans and he nodded, laughing quietly. 

“Guess I am. I need a bath, huh?” He asked and she nodded. “Who’s that you have with you?” 

Grace lifted the stuffed animal beside her, showing off the plush green dinosaur. With the hand poking out of her cast, she pointed to the dinosaur on her Toy Story blanket. 

“Rex!” 

“Miss Jody was nice enough to bring you some of your things, isn’t that right, Gracie?” Cas asked and she nodded. 

“Play?” She asked Dean and he sat on the edge of the bed, taking the dinosaur and handing her the sucker in exchange. Her eyes lit up and she glanced at Cas before Dean nodded, granting her the permission. She struggled to get the wrapper off so Dean removed it for her before handing it back over. Dean voiced Rex, making her laugh as Castiel checked her incisions and vitals, making sure all was well. 

“Okay, Miss Gracie, it’s time for you to get some rest,” Cas announced as she handed over the stick for Dean to put in the trash. Dean did so and grabbed a wet wipe, cleaning off her sticky chin and hands. 

“Wanna play,” she whined and Dean frowned, picking up the dinosaur. 

“‘Losing health units. Must rest,’” he quoted in a mock attempt at Rex’s voice, making her cackle as she recognized his words from the movie. “You heard him, little one. Both of you need to rest!” Dean assured her. She nodded, taking the dinosaur back and wrapping her arms around him. 

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Grace. Tell Dean goodbye,” Castiel said with a smile, fixing her blanket. 

“Bye-bye, Dee. Come back?” 

“Yeah, kid, I’ll come back,” he assured her, ruffling her hair before following Castiel out. 

\-- 

Sam handed his card over when the waitress slipped by his and Dean’s table at the diner near the garage, glancing at the time. 

“I could’ve paid,” Dean muttered, never one to be quiet about that kind of thing. 

“I asked you to come get lunch with me!” 

“Whatever, bitch.” 

“Jerk,” Sam smirked. “I’ve gotta get going, I told Cas that I would be stopping by to check in on Grace after lunchtime.” 

“Yeah? Cute kid. How is she?” 

“Cas says she’s doing great but she’s getting restless being bound in that hospital bed. I haven’t had a chance to stop by yet.” 

Dean glanced at the time on his phone and shrugged. 

“I don’t really have much for the rest of the day - the guys are finishing up the final touches on a restoration. I’ll go with you.” 

“You sure? You don’t have to, I can-” 

“Hey, I’ll take any excuse to potentially see my husband,” Dean explained and Sam rolled his eyes, laughing. 

“As long as you behave yourselves - you’re in the pediatrics wards, for God’s sake!” 

The brothers headed outside to the parking lot and all it took was a look from Dean before Sam was getting into the passenger’s seat of the Impala. They had been driving for all of five minutes before Dean turned off the main road. 

“Where are we going?” Sam asked, looking up from his phone. 

“I’ve just gotta go grab something real quick, man. Five minutes.” 

“You’ve gotta grab something… at Target?” 

“Five minutes!” Dean reiterated, closing the creaky Impala door behind him before jogging into the store. When he returned, he was carrying a bag that he placed in the backseat before quickly pulling out of the parking lot. 

“That took eight minutes,” Sam pointed out. 

“Shut up.” 

“Oh my God, did you get condoms? I know you didn’t stop to get condoms for office sex, Dean, that’s-” 

“Sam! I didn’t get any damn condoms!” Dean interrupted, shooting his brother a glare. “I married the man, you think I still buy fucking condoms?” He added, getting joy out of the disgusted look on his little brother’s face. 

“I did not need to know that.” 

“And I didn’t need to know that you _never_ used condoms with Lucifer,” Dean snarked back. 

“Are you ever going to let that go?” 

“No! He could’ve had something, Sam!” 

“And it would’ve been a criminal offense not to disclose that information.” 

“If you think your husband has never committed a damn crime, you have some serious blinders on.” 

“Shut up. All is fine and we’re done with this conversation,” Sam huffed, turning back to his phone. Dean smirked to himself as he drove, pleased that he had gotten Sam’s attention off of the impromptu stop. 

\-- 

“Dee!” Grace yelled when the brothers walked into the room, immediately lifting her arms up. Sam couldn’t help the surprised look on his face as he watched his brother very gently hug the toddler, wary of her cast and injuries. 

“Hey kiddo. How you feeling today?” 

“Good!” She chirped, eyes catching on Sam. She stopped for a moment and it seemed as if she knew that she had seen him before but couldn’t place him. 

“This is my little brother, Sam. He helped you out the night you got your boo-boos,” Dean explained and Grace nodded, still staring at him for a moment. 

“Made better?” She asked and Sam nodded, coming closer now that she seemed to approve. 

“I tried. I made sure you got to Dr. Cas,” Sam explained. 

“Docta Cas!” Sam thought she was just excited at the thought but it turned out that Castiel had actually come into the room. 

“Hey Gracie. Did Dee come to see you again? And Sam?” Castiel asked and she nodded with a smile. 

“Je-o?” She asked Dean, pointing at the cup of red jello on her bedside table. 

“You want your jello?” He asked, picking up the cup and peeling back the lid. 

“Help?” 

“Sure, kid, I’ll help,” he confirmed, spoon-feeding her jello. Sam watched for a moment, entranced, before stepping out into the hallway with Castiel to get an update on her status. He explained that she was doing well and due to the nature of her injuries, would need to stay in the hospital for at least another week and a half. Due to her age, it was the best way to guarantee she didn’t overdo it when playing. 

“How about you, on your front?” Castiel asked when he was done and Sam sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. 

“There’s nobody, Cas. She’s going to have to go into the system. I’m going to try my best but the foster families are full, nobody’s taking on any more kids right now because nobody’s adopting. She’ll have to be placed in a group home.” 

“She’s only two!” 

“Which means Jody may have a family or two in mind that may say yes when she gives them details. But there’s no guarantee.” 

“She’s not going to get the attention she needs in a group home.” 

“She might. You don’t know for sure..” Sam trailed off, looking through the glass window of Gracie’s room. Dean was sitting on the edge of the bed and was taking a Mr. Potato Head toy out of its box, the now-empty Target bag discarded onto the floor. Gracie was squealing with delight and pointing to the character on her blanket. Sam sighed, pressing his fingertips to his temples. 

“What about you, Sam? Your project? Can’t you take her in?” 

“We’re not ready to bring kids in yet,” Sam responded with a frown. “It’s just not possible right now.” 

“How long until it is? Sam, I won’t discharge an injured two-year old just to be thrown into one of the damned group homes around here. After you’ve preached relentlessly about how bad of a shape they’re in, I don’t see how you could possibly-” 

“Castiel, don’t. You’re getting too emotionally invested.” 

“Says the man who ran into her home and fought her father.” 

“You’re the doctor here. You can’t afford to get this invested in all of your patients, Cas.” 

“She’s not just another patient!” Cas argued and they both looked through the glass to watch Dean put an eyeball into the ear slot to make the girl laugh. They were both silent for a long time, watching the two play together. 

“The staff isn’t completely finalized yet,” Sam muttered. 

“But the building is ready?” 

“Building is just a building without the staff, Cas.” 

“She’s two. You wouldn’t need the entire staff there, just-” 

“Castiel, if there is one thing that Lucifer has nailed into my head it’s that I can’t save everyone. Neither can you.” 

“Sam, I just want-” 

“I know, Cas. I’m trying. I’ll do my best. But you have to remember that I’m just trying to make sure these kids get a fair shot at life.” 

“You’re helping, sure. You’re getting their cases taken care of. But what happens next, Sam? When you get them out of their abusive homes or off the streets, what happens then?” Castiel pressed and Sam’s face hardened. He was quiet for a minute, taking a few deep breaths. 

“What happens next is that I’m going to go home,” he finally muttered. “Tell Dean that I had to go and I got an Uber back to my car.” 

\-- 

“Sam, it just sounds like they’ve both gotten too attached to the kid and Cassie doesn’t know how to handle it. You can’t take any of it too harshly,” Lucifer assured, his hands working at the knots on Sam’s shoulders. 

“Luce, he’s right. I’m getting these kids out of bad situations and most of the time, they’re going into group homes where nobody is monitoring what’s happening.” 

“You’ve said some of the local group homes are amazing.” 

“And others aren’t.” 

“And you’re already working on providing an additional resource,” Lucifer reminded gently. 

“And it’s not fast enough, apparently.” 

“Something like that doesn’t happen overnight, Sammy,” Lucifer calmed, running his fingers through long strands of hair. 

When Sam had first learned that Lucifer was into real estate, he didn’t think too much of it. It was a solid investment, especially when done right, and in the end, most of the time it was probably a purchase that regularly sent profit into his bank account. It had honestly helped Sam to relax about the money, knowing that Lucifer wasn’t merely spending it on material things. It hadn’t really come up again until a year and a half ago, when Sam started playing around with the idea of starting his own sort of group home. Lucifer, ever supportive, had flatout purchased an entire empty apartment complex - it had just been built and they hadn’t even started handing out leases yet - and told Sam to make his dreams come true. 

They had worked on having the complex redone, leaving one whole building as it was and then various full apartments in each of the other buildings before having it rearranged as more of a dormitory-style. The plan would be to hire on full-time staff who would live there for free to help with the children - one worker per every four kids, maximum. Lucifer had come up with the idea of also interviewing some of the mothers at the battered women’s shelters - they’d be given free housing for themselves and their own children (if applicable), they’d receive a steady paycheck, and it would clear up space in the shelters at the same time. 

They’d have part-time staff to help with the younger children during the day and a kitchen team to cook meals. In addition, the biggest concern of Sam’s was education. There was the potential that some of the children would be in the same situation he and Dean had been in - out of school for quite some time and far behind where they should’ve been. Instead of throwing them straight into the public school system, they’d have their own ‘homeschool’ until it was deemed that they had caught up. If the child then wanted to go to public school, they could, but they also had the choice to continue their private studies. Essentially, it would be a free boarding school targeted to a very specific group of children. 

To address the issue of children turning eighteen and immediately being kicked out of the system with no assistance, they had decided they’d be given the opportunity to stay. They would live rent-free with the only stipulation being that they had to either get a job or go to college. If they would like (and seemed right for it), a job at the home would be provided for them. 

It was naive. The entire thing was absolutely ridiculous - the amount of money to start it and then run it was going to be extravagant and there would be no profit in return. In the grand scheme of things, it was an idiotic business move. 

But as Sam kept throwing out his ideas, Lucifer had gotten more and more excited along with him. And before Sam could even start to doubt himself, even start to remember the exorbitant cost of something like that, Lucifer had squeezed his hand and murmured: 

“Let’s do it, Winchester.” 

 

And in a whirlwind, dreams were becoming a reality and they were both coming home from a full day at their respective offices to work on this project. Lucifer worked the business end of it, dealing with the finances and picking out donors that he was sure would want to have their names associated with something like this. He also worked as a sounding board for Sam’s ideas and a life coach when Sam got discouraged. At first, Lucifer definitely said that he was on board because it was something that his husband was passionate about. Now, it was very clear that he was just as excited at what was to come. 

They were reaching the final stages, which meant that excitement was now turning to nerves. One of Sam’s biggest concerns was that no matter how meticulously he interviewed staff members and how wonderful they seemed, neither he nor Lucifer would have the time to keep checks on them as tightly as they wished. In the end, the issue had been solved relatively quickly, during a weekly videochat with his family. It took all of half an hour for it to be decided that Jo would be joining her brothers in California, housing and a job already secured. It would give them the safeguards that they wanted and it’d get Jo out of Kansas, which was something she had been talking about for a while. 

So they _were_ reaching the end of the planning stage and preparing for implementation, but there was still plenty to be done before they brought in occupants. And Sam knew that Castiel just had clouded judgement when he talked to him about it, but he still felt guilty. Lucifer’s hands worked the muscles in his back and Sam shivered when he felt Lucifer’s breath on his ear. 

“Why don’t we go grab a shower before bed, babe?” 

Sam couldn’t think of a better way to relax. 

* * *

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* * *

Sam and Lucifer had broken their resolve relatively quickly. For Lucifer, it didn’t take much pushing from his little brother; for Sam, Dean just had to talk about having always wanted a family and about wanting to give Grace the same kind of opportunities that they have been given. Therefore, less than a week later, Sam and Lucifer brought home a rather tiny human. Dean and Castiel were going to be staying with them until their paperwork went through to make sure that Grace got accustomed to the idea that she would be with the two of them. The last thing they wanted was for her to get comfortable with Sam and Lucifer just to be uprooted. 

Sam lifted Grace out of the new carseat and carried her as he followed his husband inside. Their house wasn’t childproof. It wasn’t even child-safe. Therefore, they had to keep a hawkeye on her, at least until their brothers got there to take over. 

“Cup?” Grace asked, looking around as they headed towards the kitchen. 

“Are you thirsty? We can get you a cup,” Sam assured her. 

“Can she drink out of a cup? We don’t have sippy cups,” Lucifer pointed out and Sam looked down at the little girl in his arms, shrugging. 

“She’s old enough for a cup. The question is, can you find one that isn’t glass?” 

“I’ll look… What do we give her? Can she have the orange juice in the fridge?” Lucifer questioned, sifting through their cupboards. 

“There’s a lot of sugar in that… We can, as long as it’s watered down.” 

“Gross. Why can’t she have sugar? She’s a kid, isn’t that the point?” 

“It can mess with her teeth. Plus, we don’t need a sick, _hyper_ child on our hands. Let’s just give her milk.” 

“We only have your weird almond milk,” Lucifer protested, wrinkling his nose. 

“And?” 

The next two hours continued like this, both of them questioning each other on exactly what to do with her. It just ended up further confirming their no-children policy and Lucifer handed Grace over as soon as Dean and Castiel walked through the door. Dean took her, laughing as Lucifer offered to take their bags upstairs in an attempt to disappear. Castiel joined Sam in the kitchen, raising an eyebrow at the glasses of wine that he found Sam pouring. 

“What do children eat for dinner?” Sam asked, ignoring the look as he put the bottle down. 

“Just fix her a small plate of whatever you planned on making tonight,” Castiel said with a shrug. 

“Shrimp alfredo is on the menu tonight,” Sam informed him. “Do we know if she’s allergic to shellfish?” 

“It’s not in her medical file so I guess not,” Cas answered with a shrug, moving to assist with the cooking. 

When they finished setting the table with full plates, three wine glasses, one beer, and a small cup of milk, Sam sent Castiel upstairs to retrieve Lucifer while he went to get Dean and Grace. When he walked into the living room, he found Dean nodding off in the corner of the sofa with a fully-asleep Grace in his lap and tucked under his arm, some cartoon playing on the television. Sam smiled softly at the reminder of what this chaos was all for - and if Ellen’s phone alerted her to a new message that included a photograph of her eldest son and her new granddaughter, well, Sam knew nothing about it. 

* * *

_(Three months later)_

“Sam, I swear to God, I am not above drugging your coffee to make you calm the hell down,” Lucifer called to his husband from the foyer, listening as the man scurried from one end of the house to the other. 

“This is the biggest day of my life and you want me to calm down?” Sam shouted back, sounding as if he were making his way up the stairs now. 

“Oh, I’m sorry. I thought that day was perhaps our wedding day. Or the day you were accepted into Stanford or the day you were adopted. Or when you woke up or maybe when you got your memory back,” Lucifer listed, leaning against the wall and sliding his phone out of his pocket. 

“Don’t be like that!” Sam called back and Lucifer laughed quietly, reading a few emails. 

“What are you even doing? We’re going to be late, Sam!” 

“I had to change my tie,” the younger man announced as he finally appeared in the foyer. 

“Why? I liked the red one.” 

“This one matches your eyes better.” 

“Why does that matter?” 

“Well, we’re going to be photographed together and I thought it might be a nice touch,” Sam explained sheepishly. 

“Aren’t you adorable?” 

“Shut up. Let’s go before we’re late,” Sam griped, moving past Lucifer and going outside. Lucifer laughed, mocking him before setting the security alarm and heading out as well. 

\-- 

“Sam, Lucifer. How are you feeling?” Castiel asked, walking towards them. They had just stepped inside the main building of the new group home. There were currently thirteen occupants from a home that had been shut down almost two weeks ago but today was their grand opening. It was a big deal, with family and friends and coworkers, along with the press, CPS employees, and a handful of LEOs that Sam had grown close with through this line of work. 

“I’m fine. This one, on the other hand…” Lucifer answered, earning a smack on the upper arm. 

“Stop it. I’m fine, Cas. Where’s Dean?” 

“He was parking the car, he won’t be but a moment,” Castiel answered, glancing towards the door as Jo came running up. 

“Sam!” She called out and Sam smiled, pulling his little sister in for a tight hug. “Today’s the day. Are you ready?” 

“I have no choice but to be,” Sam pointed out. 

“It’s going to be fine.” 

“If they don’t like-” 

“The kids are happy, Sam. The kids are safe and healthy and happy and that’s all that matters. _Right?_ ” 

Sam smiled, placing his chin on the top of her head as he hugged her once more. 

“Right, Jo,” he confirmed quietly. 

“There he is, the man of the hour!” Dean’s voice broke through. Sam let go of Jo to turn around, seeing Dean with Grace on his hip, followed by Ellen and Bobby. 

“What are you guys doing here?” Sam asked, kissing the top of Grace’s head before hugging his parents. 

“We wouldn’t have missed it for the world, Sam,” Ellen assured him. 

Sam quickly caught up with his parents and Dean handed Grace over to Lucifer in a wave of lace and crinoline so he could fix Castiel’s tie. 

“Your mother is right there,” Lucifer complained, knowing Ellen would’ve gladly taken the child. Despite his complaints, Lucifer began fixing Grace’s hair. 

“And if I hand her over, my mother will take my daughter back with her to Kansas,” Dean pointed out. 

“Damn right I will,” Ellen shot back. The lighthearted bickering helped Sam calm down and he wasn’t as nervous when Jo nudged him, telling him that it was time. His sister led his family outside to the row of chairs on the platform behind the podium and Lucifer cupped Sam’s cheeks, pressing their foreheads together. 

“You did it, Winchester. It’s done, you did it. Today is just about letting other people know that you did,” he reminded softly, pressing a kiss to Sam’s lips. “Come on.” 

Lucifer took Sam’s hand, leading him outside and to the platform. He dropped him off in the corner though, striding towards the podium on his own. As a man with a general powerful demeanor, the crowd grew quiet in Lucifer’s presence. 

“Ladies and Gentlemen, my name is Lucifer Alighieri and I suppose I’m the cofounder of Eden. From the most sincerest of places, we want to thank you for coming out here today to celebrate with us. Here at Eden, we value the transparency of our actions and the privacy of our resident’s. This is the reason we are here today - to make our objectives clear to the community in which it creates the largest impact. But that’s enough from me. Let me introduce you to the man who planted the seed for Eden and has nurtured it into what you see and will hear about today; without further ado, I introduce you to my husband, Mr. Sam Winchester!” 

The crowd clapped at Lucifer’s introduction while one Dean Winchester chose to loudly root for his little brother from his spot behind Lucifer on the podium. This excited little Grace, who proceeded to scream, “Sam!” in an absolutely delighted tone. Sam grinned at her as he walked towards the podium, sticking his tongue out to make her laugh before taking his spot beside Lucifer, wrapping an arm around his waist. 

“Don’t let him fool you, he’s had just as large of a part in this as I have and has most likely been the point of contact to you all regarding today’s event,” Sam said into the microphone, quick to give Lucifer credit where it was due. Lucifer smiled widely and kissed Sam’s cheek before stepping back and sitting down beside Ellen. 

“First and foremost, I want to make it clear that this was not a mere act founded by the passion of a social justice warrior that will be forgotten now that it is up and running. The idea for Eden comes from a very personal place,” Sam started, his eyes scanning over the crowd. “When I was a young child, I-” Sam faltered, his eyes catching on a particular attendee in the crowd. There was a tall man about Dean’s size with black hair and salt and pepper scruff staring at him, an undistinguishable expression on his face. It had been twenty years and it definitely showed but John Winchester was looking him right in the eyes. Sam stared back, silent in front of the crowd as he tried to wrap his head around seeing his father again for the first time since he was eight. He was knocked out of his trance by the sound of Lucifer clearing his throat behind him and he blinked, breaking eye contact and looking at the rest of the crowd. 

“When I was young, eight-years-old in fact, my biological father abandoned my older brother and I. For the next two years, we survived on the streets, not to be discovered until I was near death and taken to the hospital,” he restarted, growing confident in his words as he targeted them towards the man who had led him to that place to start with. “From there, my brother and I went from group home to group home, sometimes together, sometimes apart. They varied in quality but for two kids who had been alone and homeless for years and not much better prior to that, it didn’t seem that bad. In that home is where we were given the opportunity to meet the couple that I am honored to call mom and dad. They stepped in when the person who was supposed to let us down the most.” Sam watched as John turned around, pushing through the crowd to get away from the targeted attack. 

“It was this experience that led to my hopes of being able to advocate for juveniles in the same situation that I was once in. Eventually, I realized it wasn’t enough. I wasn’t advocating solely for children whose parents had abandoned them or something devastatingly awful had happened - I was advocating for children who had thought they were safe in a group home. That, ladies and gentlemen, is why Eden was created.” 

Sam continued for a few more minutes, explaining the mission of Eden and the extent of what they offered. Lucifer joined him for questions before the crowd was dismissed, being given the option to tour through the facilities, excluding the building with occupants. 

“Sammy, what happened, man? You looked like you’d seen a ghost,” Dean questioned once the crowd had dismissed. Sam opened his mouth to explain why he had frozen but before he could answer, he noticed Lucifer, Castiel, Grace, Ellen, and Bobby standing in a circle, laughing and joking around. He paused, smiling at the sight, and then shrugged towards his brother. 

“I did see a ghost. But he’s not important anymore.” 

\-- 

“What’s next, Sam? Where do we go from here?” Lucifer questioned later that night, speaking out into the darkness of their bedroom. Sam hummed, pulling Lucifer in tighter to his chest. 

“I got an email the other day from an old professor, asking if we’d be interested in co-teaching a class next semester on the importance of being diverse as a lawyer. Said he thought it’d be quite the treat. M’sure it was only a way to get to you, but-” 

“If we taught a class together, can we make it so attendance isn’t mandatory?” Lucifer interrupted, turning in Sam’s arms so he could look at him. 

“I mean, I guess we can? I don’t have a problem with that at all.” 

“And I don’t want there to be a final.” 

“Then why would they have any incentive to-” 

“There should be two pop quizzes in the entire semester and that’s what their entire grade is based on,” Lucifer said, his eyes glowing with mischief. Sam laughed, rolling his eyes. 

“You are such an asshole,” Sam muttered. 

“I know. You love me anyways.” 

“That’s debatable.” 

“No, it isn’t. Stop arguing and kiss me,” Lucifer demanded. 

And, well, who was Sam to deny him?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who read and loved and supported this and me. It's been a journey and I couldn't have continued without the loving support I've received. You all are utterly amazing and I love you each and every one of you! xxx 
> 
> P.S. I'm @beyondthebarrier on Tumblr - feel free to come and say hi! (Just ignore the fact that I haven't visually updated my page in AGES.)


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